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vereelimee Archive

View 0 posts and 149 comments by vereelimee on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
15

Right now you are trying to break a habit. The easiest way is to pick up a new habit. Really anything goes as long as it is not destructive. I mean if you want to break some stuff that is ok but don't break yourself. You do want to go and express your emotions. Art can be helpful and at the end there's a concrete thing you may like keeping as a reminder. Anything that will make you feel good about yourself. From cleaning to exercise to volunteering, there are lots of ways to get your brain to re…
/r/askFDS25/10/20 07:11 PM
3

So frustrating. It's one thing to discuss your various food preferences. It's another to ask if I am really a starving hot mess because I don't know how to turn a knob on the stove or oven. Every day I hope a man wants to take me to dinner because otherwise I have no way of feeding myself! I will never forget the kindness of this meal that cost you $20 plus tax./s I could maybe understand asking if you bake. Baking and cooking are different. Lots of chefs I know do not bake. They hate baking for…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/20 11:08 PM
2

Even then you can go to a great restaurant. Expecting top level meals out of your partner all the time is a crazy high expectation. If he is a foodie, then he should know how to cook the food he enjoys eating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/20 10:59 PM
131

There is a lot of anger there. A lot of anger. She definitely made the right call. Remember ladies, don't make an excuse. Block and delete. You do not want to witness or experience anger firsthand. You have no idea what a random man is capable of doing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/20 10:52 PM
8

Absolutely. It is good to express those emotions. Recently I have been using Intellect. A free app to improve aspects of your mental health. I'm working on my procrastinating habit but I think having an outside method of accountability helps me. Daily check ins have made me feel some control. I'm not sure if it will work but I want to change my bad habits. There are other paths based on relationships and security. At this point, I'm willing to try anything that will help me level up. I'm not sur…
/r/askFDS24/10/20 05:06 PM
21

Make a friend. If you like animals, then a cat or dog can be a wonderful companion and provide emotional support and connection. If you know that you lean towards SADD, then get a special light or heater. Do whatever you need to feel safe and secure. Whatever you decide, don't base your choice on a man. You certainly don't need a man to survive. There are all sorts of things you can do to fill your time. Pick up a new hobby that you have been considering or seen others do but never took the plun…
/r/askFDS24/10/20 04:28 PM
25

I have been through this pattern. No matter the reason, this is proof he isn't wholly invested in you. If he was, then he'd be direct and reschedule right away. Or he would have told you directly how he didn't know when his work would end. Or he'd have still gone on the date even if he was busy because he wanted to see you. He would not be stringing you along. So it could be a one off but take a few steps back. You should not be confused or stressed about dating someone. If he wants to date, the…
/r/askFDS24/10/20 04:04 PM
69

I think it's a weird control/boundary push. If you answer that means you have lowered your standards because it's such a ridiculous question. You would never answer it in person unless the person were visually impaired. Even then only in a specific context would you tolerate such a question. So the fact a woman answers means she did what they wanted. Also they're so low effort they can't possibly imagine that women wear a variety of clothes. I mean what even are pants do they cover your arms? Ar…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/20 07:17 PM
19

I don't think you can ever understand someone that does not respect you. If you could understand, then that means you changed your own mindset. I feel like the best analogy is a bag of chips versus a fridge full of fresh ingredients. A person should choose to cook a full well balanced meal but that requires washing vegetables, chopping them, preparing the meat. Cooking everything in steps to build layers of flavor. Setting the table. Washing the dishes afterwards. Cleaning the kitchen counters. …
/r/askFDS21/10/20 08:32 PM
83

Read what you wrote. He made you feel anxious and uncertain. That is not something you want in a relationship. He went out to find someone else that is "better than you". He failed and came back to you. He was with other women because he doesn't really like you. He thinks you are beneath him. This is a huge red flag. This is not love. He said whatever he thought you wanted to hear. You mention no action that made you feel secure in a future with him. Then he had the audacity to say you will reco…
/r/askFDS21/10/20 06:23 PM
84

You're both the reason you are not together. This isn't a one way street. For reasons, you couldn't make it work. That's ok. You got help and healed. Ask yourself why you were unable to do that when you were together? I'm guessing a part of you didn't trust him to support you 100%. You were able to do it alone. So something about your relationship held you back. That means that you are ultimately not compatible. That's totally fine. It's not your fault or his fault. At the time the two of you co…
/r/askFDS18/10/20 09:48 PM
5

Good for you! Keep working it is worth the effort. One step at a time is the way to go.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/20 03:55 PM
19

If therapy isn't an option, then there are loads of books you can read. The FDS wiki has a list. Most of all you are not broken. Give yourself time to adjust. It may take time to associate warmth and affection with sex again but you can do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/20 02:53 PM
147

Yes the eternal cringe of men talking about "dating a girl". This is only ok if you are both still minors. In any other circumstances 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 Leave the girls alone they're underage and you're yucky!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 11:29 PM
7

Your looks don't matter. Men act like they do but it's not the end all be all of relationship success. Gorgeous stunning women get mistreated and cheated on all the time. Of course it's a red flag if a man mentions your looks all the time. That's a sign he isn't valuing you as a human being. Your attitude matters. You not tolerating bad behavior and low effort matter the most.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 05:35 PM
16

I have tried that and really it makes me more stressed. Possibly from being introverted, but being in a room with a stranger and then they touch you. That feels stressful...the same with getting a haircut. Acupuncture did relieve stress for me, but that isn't touching but rather needles. I just get interaction from dogs and cats. Not exactly the same, but there is no awkwardness. Or tension of I am paying this person for a service...but what if I don't like the result? That part is always the wo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 02:31 AM
11

Ohhhh noooooo. I hate seeing that setup but it is so common. Hope she gains some perspective.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 09:15 PM
115

Honestly touch starved is the only part you cannot really simulate any other way. I mean a cat isn't really the same. Plus the cat always has to have the last word and hard boundaries. Currently, I am without cat and really I feel like getting a new cat would be a better time investment than dating. I feel the same as you. I have dated but that feels more like a pitfall than usual. I really don't want to tie myself to a desperate guy because he is lonely. Fall and winter dating lean heavily towa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 09:08 PM
5

That is difficult. However, I want to ask you why you are considering anything but your own happiness? You can always make changes to your lifestyle. You can find a job somewhere outside of the peer pressure. Don't forget, you get to choose what you want to do as an adult. It may feel nearly impossible to escape a controlling family or religion. I don't want to assume either is harming you, but if that is the case, then ask yourself if you really want to stay there. I don't know what your life i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 03:50 PM
29

Give it some time. When you internalize FDS, your outward attitude changes and people notice. If you use OLD, then it's more obvious. You'll still attract LVM but when you find someone that has dating potential you will ask yourself if you like him. If you don't, then you block and delete. It's all about standards and not tolerating low effort. You don't respond. You don't explain. You just block. I won't settle for someone that is bored and only cares about his needs. It's not worth my time or …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 03:06 PM
19

If you're not already familiar, Terry Pratchett's Discworld has a variety of characters. From maturing witches to DEATH to cowardly wizards to gods with only one follower to conmen turned mailmen. There's probably something you may like. A few of his novels have been turned into series or movies. Last year Good Omens came out and was a hit. Usually I watch a lot of science fiction. I particularly love Stargate Atlantis with some badass women in the cast. There's no vampires but the Wraith do suc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 04:26 AM
15

Yes The Good Place is generally in line with FDS. However you need to get through the first season before it really fits with FDS. There is major character growth and leveling up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 04:12 AM
19

Narcissist's Prayer That didn't happen. And if it did, it wasn't that bad. And if it was, that's not a big deal. And if it is, it is not my fault. And if it was, I didn't mean it. And if I did. You deserved it. If this sums up his behavior, you may have dated a narcissist. This really only matters so you can recognize the behavior pattern and avoid it in the future.
/r/askFDS12/10/20 02:30 PM
23

Basic human decency is something we give to complete strangers on the street or in line at the grocery store. You wouldn't make them cry or hurt them. That is the least a partner can do while being a part of your life. This is the harsh truth. If someone treats you with less respect and basic human decency than they do to a complete stranger, then they don't care about you. They are actively doing you harm on purpose. You don't deserve to be in that kind of relationship. No one deserves it. I'm …
/r/askFDS10/10/20 09:51 PM
110

You're not the only one. I would date multiple men, but it's near impossible to find two that I like at the same time. If it happens, then after a few days, they throw a red flag so you are back to looking again. Granted I'm catching a lot more red flags thanks to FDS. So I'm not investing time into LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 04:31 PM
2

The audacity! Plus you could not politely turn away strangers. Or you would be known as a poor hostess! Women have always had unfair expectations to be nice. Granted the specific case for Martha is different since they both agreed on a relationship. She could have easily remained a single widow. Although two meetings seems quick for a marriage even at that time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 02:41 AM
6

Well that is definitely atrocious. Can't condone that at all. Thanks for the info
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 01:04 AM
8

Ok I'm not as familiar with Magic but HIV isn't always contracted through sex. So in that case I see no reason to leave a partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 06:44 PM
29

Definitely give him time to ask again. I do suggest a phone/video call to further screen before meeting in person. Also you can always ask about quarantine and extra precautions they are taking. That would cue you are interested but thinking over the risks.
/r/askFDS08/10/20 06:41 PM
2

Thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 02:59 PM
8

Right but they also lived in those fields or grounds of a large estate. Unless you lived in a major urban area like London. With no electricity and seldom running water or proper sewage. There were not endless choices or even many restaurants to dine out. It was absolutely normal for a man to come to your house on a "first date" and meet your entire family. I can't imagine letting a man meet my family on a first date. Half the time you find out he's not worth the effort of the date 😔 then you bl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 02:38 AM
21

Gross.... At least he told on himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 02:12 AM
11

Maybe the first line of P&P It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. At the very least demonstrates he may read books... Yeah I'm grasping at straws...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 01:54 AM
121

First red flag, dating for 6 years! She never stood a chance at getting a real ring. He clearly does not value her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 08:10 PM
6

Exactly this! With or without a man, we will be fabulous. Nothing will change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 07:31 PM
15

Pick up some fiction as well. Reading is a great way to distract yourself by immersing yourself in a different and safe world. I highly recommend rereading any old favorites from your childhood. Personally I love Ella Enchanted as she slowly becomes fully independent and overcomes her 'blessing' to be obedient. The movie is a sad representation. I love Howl's Moving Castle for similar reasons. The main character is undervalued by people and sets out on a journey of self discovery. The movie vers…
/r/askFDS07/10/20 07:06 PM
15

Right. I always felt awful for Bella's dad. Poor guy had to stand by and watch while supernatural creatures fight over his daughter like a toy. He clearly wanted her to have a happy and healthy life. He moves them closer to a community support system he values. Then all of a sudden the new people in town are vampires. Awful luck on his part.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 06:44 PM
1

Definitely. That series needed more dogs being petted. Really the main let down is what happened to those direwolves. It started with wonderful dogs and they didn't all get spoiled rotten.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:32 PM
1

Same to you queen! Enjoy being awesome.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:30 PM
19

Seriously that would be excellent. You send it to them and it has a second set of results for women to point out red flags. Like warning high levels of possible narcissism when questions 7, 13, 20, 31, 39, 52 are answered positively. It is probably harder to do than I think but I can dream. It would be a time saver at least to avoid narcissists since others are not as consistent with answers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:53 AM
23

Ok but I'd like an orange dragon. I could use it to invoke pain upon the unworthy and immoral. All while stopping to pet all the dogs along the way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:41 AM
14

Yeah.. You eat the ugly ones warm out of the oven. Then everyone sees the perfect ones leftover
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 03:01 AM
78

I'd like to point out that over in r/sex there is a post about a man receiving oral for the first time in his 12 year marriage. He at no point criticizes his wife. However the comments section has a lot of angry men. They are upset for no reason. They aren't involved yet they are triggered at the thought of not receiving oral sex. It's absurd. The standards are not equal. Keep that in mind, that lots of men feel entitled to your body. They will put in low effort if you allow it. Yet they expect …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/20 08:49 PM
57

Wow. That hurt to read. I'm glad you are free of that clown!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/20 08:31 PM
29

Make a list of all his bad qualities. Include any mean and judging things he said to you. The list needs anything he did to hurt you and how it made you feel. Add the reason why you broke up with this man. Then make another list of how much better your life is without this man. All the freedom you have without him in your life. If that isn't enough, then break down why you want a partner. List the qualities of your ideal partner and all the value they would add to your life. Compare that to your…
/r/askFDS06/10/20 06:41 PM
6

You need to be comfortable in your own skin. This takes time. Forgive yourself. You are allowed to make mistakes. Don't wallow and collect yourself before trying again. I also believe you need to find what makes you satisfied with life and happy. If something in your life is dragging you back to a negative place, then consider replacing it. Not everyone is going to care about you. That's ok. However the vast majority of people are not out to get you or do you harm. I do suggest meditation. Mindf…
/r/askFDS05/10/20 03:15 PM
7

When will they learn the vagina has muscle?!? It expands and contracts. It is not "tight" for all eternity. There is no only one size forever. There is no "stretching it out". It's one of those facts men are too dumb to figure out. They keep telling on themselves how bad they are at sex. This is basic female anatomy. His poor wife.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 02:57 AM
13

It works extremely well. You can google 'grey rock' to get a sense of how to word replies to seem extra boring.
/r/askFDS04/10/20 06:47 PM
75

Just 'drop the rope'. Don't make efforts to contact him. Limit in person interactions to boring small talk. There is a technique called grey rocking, which is to be as uninteresting as possible. This is to make toxic people think you are as boring as paint drying on a wall. Essentially give him no personal information. Give vague answers and say phrases like "I don't know" or "that's nice" or "I have plans". Don't promise any of your time to be around him. You can outright ignore him at social e…
/r/askFDS04/10/20 06:32 PM
8

I was thinking along the same lines as you. However, a few weeks of using OLD reminded me how tiring it is. Also men can be soooooo boring. I swear talking to myself is more entertaining. So some of these guys look good on paper, but a lot of them are bored and trying to entertain themselves while pretending they are a catch. Beware it may be a snoozefest out there. There are lots more desperate men as well. I have come across more 'what do you like in a man' over confident and composed human be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/20 09:38 PM
28

Now the urban ladies have the option of a 'field he knows' or a 'deserted alley by the dumpster'! How will she choose? Stay tuned after this public service announcement about Tetanus vaccines...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 06:35 PM
18

Congrats on your glow up!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 06:29 PM
13

Exactly. It's like they see the word 'hookup' and can't see anything else. If anything it is that word means a woman knows what sex is and since they don't know they need to talk to her. Maybe she can explain how sex works because we all know they are at best on a pass/fail curve.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 06:28 PM
1

You absolutely described a toxic behavior. This is something you need to stop. Even if it means cutting out people. If you continue, then I think your friendships may implode if the stalking comes to light. I did suggest you reach out to the rest of the gamer group for help. Private chats exist and you can easily start one with a gaming friend you trust. Of course this is riddled with judgement. I'd tell my friends the exact same thing. To stop the behavior and walk away. It's not easy. You need…
/r/askFDS02/10/20 12:59 AM
2

That is a negative view. You're entitled to it. However, I don't think you're doing yourself any favors by not reaching out to anyone. It's up to you to sort out your life. Random advice on the internet only goes so far. You're in charge of your own life. I wish you all the best.
/r/askFDS01/10/20 11:19 PM
30

Only after I buy myself a coffee /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 10:00 PM
2

Like I said block yourself from his account. Google will let you block devices from the account. If you can't do it get a trusted friend to do it for you. One of your other gaming friends. All you need to say is you having access to his account is now making you uncomfortable. You need to stop this. No matter what is going on between you two. This is stalking. This is not healthy for you. I do not care about your reasons. Your logic is broken at this point. You are using whatever you can to just…
/r/askFDS01/10/20 08:46 PM
6

First of all, stop it. Did you ever consider he's messing with you? I know exactly what my Google account links to online. I guarantee he knows as well. He probably knows you are looking through his account. Google logs all history between devices logged into your account. It displays activity by device. He knows you're snooping. Assume that he knows. Assume that he is pretending to be a great guy by allowing you access to his online history. Guess what you can't possibly know if this is his onl…
/r/askFDS01/10/20 06:04 PM
6

No no. Don't worry about sharing "bad news". I've been aware of bad chemicals. It's sort of a trade off though. My family has a long history of skin cancer being pale. So it's good to know what I'm putting on and into my body. I do think everyone has to make that choice. There are risks with everything. You could overdose on almost anything including vitamins if you took large amounts. So it's good to make an informed choice and knowing that the risk is higher than normal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 11:24 PM
7

Darn it. Seriously why are all the skin care products I like bad for me?!?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 10:10 PM
3

Yes! No breakouts from protecting your skin. That is the way it should be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 08:29 PM
21

I want to add sunscreen. Specifically look into Japanese sunscreens. I love the water based sunscreen I use. It is a game changer for me. I don't instantly sweat after applying it to my face. This absorbs quickly and is non greasy. Also it feels moisturizing instead of like I am sealing my face. My go to is the Biore Aqua Rich Watery Essence 50++++SPF They have a different rating system for SPF as well. 50 is the rating for UVB protection while each plus is a rating for UVA protection. Each is a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 07:18 PM
6

This is not a red flag. Besides Reddit I don't use social media. I did in the past, but it adds little value to my life. I have stopped using it and my mental health is overall better for it. If they have the same mindset, then I see no issue with it. If they are lying about using social media, then it is a red flag. Obviously because they lied to you. If you have his phone number, then you can search for social media accounts, but there is no guarantee you would find them.
/r/askFDS28/09/20 09:59 PM
2

The best advice I have. You are evaluating whether you like him or not. Focus on whether you like him and want to date him. If he fits your standards and requirements, then you ask yourself if you like him enough for a second date. Do not think about whether he likes you. He asked you on a date. If he really doesn't want to date you, then he will let you know. So remove that from your mind. All that matters is if you like him and he is treating you well. You are looking for red flags and deal br…
/r/askFDS28/09/20 09:48 PM
7

I agree with your list. I cannot change my introversion so I need someone that respects my space and need for downtime. I would add that he is respectful of our differences but willing to communicate to work out any issues. There are going to be things you do not agree on or enjoy sharing but you still need to be on the same page. Along with that if the relationship is serious, then I would expect him to put me first as his partner over family and friends when I really need him. I've seen many c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 09:24 PM
14

That's up to you. You have to ask yourself if it's worth the possible trouble? Will your SO be upset if he finds out? Why do you want to hang out with this other guy? Are you benefiting from this friendship? You seem to be fine without having him in your life so it's odd you suddenly want to include him. Also read the handbook. There's a section on what you should disclose about past relationships.
/r/askFDS28/09/20 04:02 AM
12

I had some guy ask for cookies that I mentioned baking. As if he was entitled to my cookies. No way I'm showing up to a first date with my freshly baked cookies. That's crazy. I plan on eating those cookies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 12:43 AM
18

Exactly. This is not just a "gamer" it's a LVM. The hobby doesn't matter. His actions matter. I'm glad you have such a lovely relationship with shared hobbies!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 06:21 PM
2

You got a boat?!? Really though it is frustrating. I'm wary because guys that don't share personal info lean towards LVM and no commitment. Then you also don't want them to over share and lovebomb or trauma bond. I feel like my perception of normal is skewed from all the extreme men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 02:28 AM
22

I keep having the opposite issue. They give basic info answers. So I feel like they have little to no personality. I have to specifically ask a question to get a personal response. I feel sometimes like I'm stranded on a mudflat trying to dig for clams but there are no bubbles. So I am pretty sure there is maybe one clam and it's probably 5 miles down the beach. It can be hard to get them to say anything personal. I do think both extremes are not great. One side they are in love with themselves.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 11:20 PM
11

Do not forget zoos if they are open in your area. More zoos are having adult nights which can be a perfect date option. Edit: realized I replied to not OP I'll just leave it anyway
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 11:03 PM
1

Then he rules himself out. Easy! On to the next guy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 08:58 PM
21

He probably needs all those red flags to mark a trail in his murder field. Big yikes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 08:57 PM
3

Probably depends on if you are buying your own drinks...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 08:50 PM
13

It's not a date it's a hangout /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 08:48 PM
33

I love a flat pillow. I do sleep on my back so too much poof and it hurts my neck. I draw the line at gross dirty old pillows though. There's a difference between it's flat because of design and flat because it's an ancient germ breeding ground.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 03:39 AM
3

I recommend meditation as well. I feel like it's a good way to check in with yourself and your body. Also if there's something on your mind that tends to come to the surface so you can acknowledge and process it. Also there is a lot of freedom in it. There isn't really a wrong way to go about it if you are being mindful. There are many guided meditations to be found that focus on a variety of topics. Sometimes it isn't until I meditate that I realize that I was holding in an emotion. Being still…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 03:16 AM
8

Dogs always offer to wash the dishes. This seems like a win-win!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 02:48 AM
31

Exactly!! There's no way I'm changing my standard and quality of life for a man. If they aren't adding value, then there is no point. I don't need a man to take me out. I gave him a chance to prove he is worth my time and effort. Somehow these men think we're auditioning for them. It's really not the case. I'd rather be single than settle for a stingy guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:31 PM
14

Absolutely... That makes more sense. Keep on being excellent queen!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:25 PM
17

I believe the spotify playlist is in the sidebar. I know it is embedded into the official website as well
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:19 PM
51

Still mind blowing. Do these men think we don't eat dinner every single day? I cook for myself from scratch. Anything I cook is 100% better than eating out. In terms of flavor, health, and complexity. Agreeing to a date for food is the last thing on my mind. If I'm picking the place, then it's my favorite restaurant. I eat there regularly. Them picking up a check is still less than treating a friend or family member. I guarantee that they don't tip as well as I do at my favorite restaurant. I re…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:16 PM
2

I am 100% with you. The idea of an elaborate wedding does not appeal to me. However, even eloping can be made special. There can still be a small ceremony or action planned to celebrate your marriage. This is not about money. This is about valuing each other and the commitment you are making. This is supremely easy to do and does not need to be over the top expensive as long as what you do is meaningful to both people. Many people find a traditional wedding allows them a detailed way of showing …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 11:14 PM
17

Good on you. I have recommended FDS via PM before. It is up to them if they follow through. I am disappointed you would be banned for trying to give others a different perspective. We all know that women don't get support in male dominated spaces. They push their agenda and ignore the agency of women at times. Although it seems men spread the word on our behalf by hating FDS. I found it through men hating on FDS in a post. Any woman who has spent time on Reddit will notice that men really don't …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 10:11 PM
27

My thoughts exactly! Why would I buy a console for a man? No way are they satisfied with only a game console. Like yeah, here is a fancy box but you can't play with it! It does light up when you plug it in though. They can enjoy watching me play games though! It's fun for both of us /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 10:00 PM
13

I absolutely agree. I do have to say that many romantic comedies are problematic featuring Pick Mes. Those are damaging when she is desperate for a man or ignores all the red flags. There are entire subgenres of romantic comedy that are huge red flags. Like the 'contract marriage' plot which should raise the instinct to run away. As if you can live happily ever after with a man forced into a marriage. Big yikes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 09:36 PM
9

I highly recommend spoiling your dog with some homemade treats. Alton Brown's Stinkin' dog treats are a crowd pleaser among all the dogs I know. Super easy with a food processor and all dog friendly ingredients. Plus you can make cute shapes with cookie cutters. Fair warning this may cause more love and attention from your dog.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 08:16 PM
54

Let's also point out he calls her a 'girl'. He does not respect her. He is not mature. He certainly can not handle dating a woman. Also his reaction is anger. He is furious she would not settle for a murder date in a field with only hot liquids to defend herself. She definitely dodged a bullet here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 02:48 AM
1

That's a tricky blend. Usually better to wear darker colors. If the dog has short fur, then the fur will easily be removed from your clothes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 02:56 PM
12

It's super creepy. It's one thing to post a photo of a pet. If I date you, then I want to see what color fur situation is going in your home. Should I avoid whites or blacks? I will at some point be covered in pet fur. That's expected. I will certainly not be holding a random baby. To expect parenting help or bonding from a person you just met is insane. If you show up with a baby on a first date unexpectedly, first I'm leaving and second I'm wondering if I should investigate you to report to an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 12:36 AM
18

That's right. We can all admire your jewelry! I always compliment pieces that catch my eye. It's great to boost another woman for their good taste and effort. Enjoy treating yourself queen you deserve it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 11:43 PM
66

You're a queen! For those that need to hear it: Sure it's technically "legal" in the states but only on the surface level. Last I checked you can't legally marry multiple people so it's definitely not legal across the board. Maybe in other countries but that's an entirely different cultural scenario. "But it's legal" is one of the dumbest arguments for this issue. So what if it's legal? That has absolutely nothing to do with the prospect of a stable and secure relationship. Marriage is legal but…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 05:46 AM
11

Your guess is as good as mine. Generally offers of crippling or maiming don't appeal to me. It's a personal preference. You do you/s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 04:01 AM
20

Whitney Cummings has an excellent stand up routine about sex dolls. Watch it on her Netflix special. She did have one made as well in her likeness. It was quite interesting but basically boils down to well hell yes. Let them play with a doll. No women get hurt! Along with a surprisingly in depth look at the communities that use them as far as comedy goes. Also she had the idea that young men should be graded on how they treat their dolls before letting them have access to real women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 10:19 PM
20

How to advocate for yourself especially your sexual and mental health. What standards are acceptable for a doctor and when you should report someone for being 'creepy' or 'inappropriate'. I have seen so many posts on Reddit about should I report fill-in-the-blank professional job. The answer is almost always yes, but our young ladies need to know that it is normal to want to feel safe and respected, especially in a medical or school setting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 10:29 PM
31

I do agree it's not all cases. However there are many stories easily found on Reddit that are the man being unable to find another woman. I think a lot of women get a wake up call after opening their relationship and seeing the disparity. Even if a man finds extra partners, it will never equal the same amount of men a woman can easily find. The pick me gets a chance at seeing how she can level up. Obviously such a situation is horrible in the first place, but it is no longer in favor of the man.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 05:53 PM
63

It's an instant declaration that they do not respect women. Indicating that the sex will be bad and they could never meet your standards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 03:47 PM
181

I think the most interesting part is that men no longer have that same power. At least with polyamory, there are many accounts with men being shocked their partner finds instant options to have sex. Yet he can't get anyone to pick him. So many cases of men being mad that their plan to have all these random women wanting his dick. None of them want him. Except it's not magical and his partner is drowning in offers. Usually the woman realizes how absurd it is to stay with the angry delusional man.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 02:31 PM
2

Wait he has an 8 inch heel? Can he really walk in 8 inch heels? Surely he can't think he's taller any other way unless he has heels. I mean to attach an 8 inch object to his body...how bizarre. Did he like super glue a stick to his arm? His back? His neck? Is it an 8 inch teddy bear that sits on top of his head? A pineapple? Is he cosplaying as the Chiquita banana lady? The possibilities are endless. Personally only a man walking in an 8 inch heel would impress me. Any other 8 inch object is a w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 03:50 PM
61

There's a gritty and dark live action Mulan from 2009, you can find it with English subtitles. She's a total badass and they include her promotion to general and commanding troops. There is a more HVM included as well but it's not necessarily a happy ending.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 02:34 PM
4

Yes. There is a lot of bad erotica. However, there is probably a style or characters or scenes you may like. If it's bad, then no harm done you move on. If it is well done, then you can feel the intimacy/emotional connection that you are missing. At least that is the element that I find lacking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:10 PM
7

Thank you for everything you do to create a safe space. I appreciate having this community and all of our mods! You're all fabulous!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 01:12 PM
30

Bad photos means low effort. Sure flattering photos are not easy for everyone but that's the point. The same thing for no personal information on a bio. It's a blank canvas and essentially he could pretend to be anything to match her interests and lifestyle. Not necessarily the case but it's still best to proceed with caution.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 10:26 PM
13

Heck yes!!! No one needs a man to manage their finances.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:08 AM
41

Absolutely spot on! I rarely if at all see men chastising men for threats against women. Or name calling or rude comments suggesting rape get loads of support. One of my huge annoyances is the men misgender so frequently. They can't even use OP or gender neutral pronouns. This is not hard to do. Even when the gender is specified they misgender others. Imagine having such a narrow view of the world you only respect other men and assume you are always talking to a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 11:11 PM
0

I'm not sure about that. My sister and I have definitely traded shoes/outfits to help the other. On multiple occasions we have swapped. At the very least friends would help you locate something to help you not be in pain. If you're not the same size in clothes/shoes, etc, it's not an option to trade. Dismissing or ignoring the pain of someone else is outrageous. At the very least you could offer a pain killer or bandage. This is not hard to do by any means. This is basic human kindness to recogn…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 10:13 PM
29

Read. Read the classics. Read about main characters from all walks of life. Read different genres. Read because it is one of the easiest ways to gain perspective on how other people live. Specifically read books with female protagonists with female authors. Jane Austen. Octavia Butler. Maya Angelou. Margaret Atwood. Agatha Christie. There are many others you can easily find at your local library. If you are lacking perspective, then reading is the solution. There are infinite stories to be found…
/r/askFDS24/08/20 12:53 AM
27

Ohhhh no 🙃 It's more like I have ten favorite authors. Reading books is not something I considered being a factor in dating. However, it's mind boggling to think of someone who doesn't read. There is a big reward from reading which is empathy. That's like the guy who recited poetry to me on a first date. Except the poems had nothing to do with the current situation or context. Then he was baffled because women like poetry...we were in a public place. I was not the only one fully cringing because…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 06:22 PM
19

Wow. He took himself out of the running. That's hilarious. I can only imagine the blundering 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 05:33 PM
33

I always do try to reach out. I'm not sure if it is effective or not. Most don't respond. Either way sharing information is sometimes all you can do for a stranger on the internet. I know we all wish the best for women everywhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 09:42 PM
6

Yes the what was I thinking. Sheer bewilderment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 07:35 PM
5

Kudos to you for sharing! Every experience is helpful for all of us to recognize patterns in LVM behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 10:11 PM
34

This is why vetting and context matters so much. First, he only seemed interested when you let the ball drop. Second, you know he isn't motivated to advance his education when it's essential for his profession. Not everyone needs to be formally educated but if it limits your career, then it's a red flag. Third, you know his situation and that it won't work for you. Maintain your healthy boundary but don't be surprised if he has some misplaced emotion because you were a civil friendly human being…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 08:46 PM
8

So preposterous. As if you'd remember a creepy man's voice when they didn't even have the guts to talk to you in person. Ah yes...you were the sweaty creepy looking guy lurking by the mannequins. I remember the scream you made when security escorted you out of the building. That's the only scenario that has you remembering customers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 05:37 AM
4

I legit had some old man with a cane want to get in my convertible with me. All because I waved him across the street to be nice. It was hot outside. He's at least 30-40 years older than me and struggling to walk. Yet he thought I'd be interested in him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 05:29 AM
21

So ridiculous. Men don't need shelters to the same degree because they aren't targets. Even women living in shelters are at a higher risk. They have been followed from shelters and attacked because they are viewed as no one caring about their well being. Men's shelters do exist. However, men do tend to be homeless more out of choice because they will not experience the same rates of violence living on the streets. Also because they do not want to abide by rules in place at shelters commonly incl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:07 PM
2

Ugh mpreg don't get me started. Such a weird concept. It's bizarre. That's not a possibility so why pretend it's an option. Again like you said that's just a straight relationship in disguise.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 01:03 AM
4

This is oddly why I like gay or BL stories. The couple is two men and generally they seem to have multiple romances in a tv series. Also if either one does something stupid they're a man and I don't feel the same anger at a woman overlooking major red flags. It's not everyone's taste. Still I've always enjoyed romance and drama. This feels like a guilty pleasure to mainline a romance without having to hate the characters' flaws. There's no women usually that are suffering from a man's actions. N…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 04:37 AM
4

Good for you!! I plan to do the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 09:22 PM
11

I am with you in this mindset. Also I feel like there will be more whining and desperate men that feel they deserve attention. I am not a cure for boredom. I have way more fun things to do than weed through all the LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 07:48 PM
14

It's the problem that you need to learn from your own personal experiences. Reading the handbook is one thing but applying it is another. You can read about sex and relationships forever, but it's not same as living and having first hand experience. So even if you give advice, it doesn't always work because they will not 100% trust your account.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 06:47 PM
30

Plus she finds treasure along the way because she's smart too. All while picking up various women with different skills and saving each other. I'd watch the heck out of that movie!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:18 PM
12

Exactly. I am 31 now and I would rather be single than settle. I've dated before plague times and none of those guys made me think I would be happy married to them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 08:01 PM
1

Definitely it's not you. I have never been considered thin or fit by normal standards. My recommendation make an OLD profile not to date but so you realize how many options you have. Granted I didn't believe it right away until I went on some dates. Really it is up to you what to do. However, I guarantee you are not limited at all. If you really wanted sex, then you could easily find it with an attractive fit man within a week. I'm not suggesting that at all but it's certainly possible. Things I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 07:37 PM
10

It's more that the photos are so low effort. It's a sign they aren't willing to put in effort into a potential relationship. Men will complain they never take photos of themselves. As an excuse of why they have fish pictures or obviously cropped out couple photos where the woman is missing, etc. Hell no. At the very least learn to take a good selfie. Plus you'll see "obligatory fish picture" in their profile. This is not a thing that women as a whole are dying to see. We're not excited about dea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 02:55 PM
25

I usually just walk away. I like your option though
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 12:33 AM
2

I understand your anger. However, I do not hate all men. Certainly if I did then I wouldn't even be interested in FDS. Your anger is valid. My disappointment is equally valid. Please don't forget that disappointment is the result of trying to foster change and losing hope because someone could not make the bare minimum effort. Being disappointed means, that I have seen no change and they should feel ashamed. No growth or attempt to foster safe spaces for women. If they do remove this safe space,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 07:27 PM
105

I'm with you on that the anti-women in general Reddit is so depressing. They alarmingly misgender many people. They can't even use OP or neutral pronouns like they. That is such a simple thing to do. Yet I see it so frequently in other subs. At this point I feel such cringe and disgust seeing the comments "women don't exist on the internet" or whatever version they used. Of course women don't want to be in a hateful male dominated space. I'll be pretty disappointed if FDS is taken away. I may no…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 04:36 AM
49

Even worse when the profile has a younger age and then right beneath "haha I'm actually 10 years older". As if you didn't rule them out already from the photo. They never look close to the age they are trying to pass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 12:29 AM
28

Sigh the standard of not wanting to live in garbage is such a low bar. That's sad. At least they shouldn't want to live in their garage!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 11:32 PM
106

That's the saddest part. As if a good thing could ever make up for the bad. You're only complaining about him but sure he's wonderful except for the sea of red flags that you listed. It's painful to read.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 06:29 PM
3

That's completely necessary. Good for you! Keep up the good work even when people don't understand! I was an education docent for years at a wildlife park. There's a lot people don't know even about local animals. I remember trying to teach people that slugs and bats are not just pests! Bats have an even worse reputation now
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 08:56 PM
9

Your job sounds awesome and technically skilled. I am guessing you are trying to determine impact of human presence and development projects. You don't need to answer. I don't want to dig into your personal details. I understand the flags are easy to overlook. I was hopeful about the last man I dated before quarantine but I realized that I put in more effort. I gave him slack that he didn't deserve. He was attractive to me and we had common interests. Rare for me to like someone and have somethi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 04:35 PM
56

Yikes. You dogded a bullet there. He wouldn't even treat you decently on your birthday? He gave you all the red flags. So glad you made it out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 10:33 AM
8

No burning during quarantine!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/20 08:18 PM
8

If you don't game, then it makes no sense. When I was little I was unable to beat the games so I'd watch my siblings. Until I got older and could play, but I would still watch sometimes since strategy matters. I never had interest in FPS, shooting style games. The games I play are puzzle based like Zelda or cute like Animal Crossing. Zelda tends to be really hard and we'd take turns trying to get through a hard part and not die. My sister and I still play this way. However, just watching and not…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 03:37 PM
38

This is the Gilmore Girls TV show. Emily is the mother/grandmother to the main characters. She doesn't get enough screen time honestly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/20 06:21 PM
2

It's really easy to customize and hide whatever you don't want to see! I love it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/20 01:18 AM
3

No problem! The app I use allows me to filter my feed directly. It's a 3rd party though. Enjoy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/20 10:57 PM
5

It really depends on what version of Reddit you're using. I mainly use the Boost app. This has a direct option to select the drop down menu (looks like 3dots next to each post) and filter out an entire subreddit. It literally says Filter out r... Or users since sometimes that's a source as well. I know it can be done with regular Reddit. I think it's easier to do with the PC version. This may help https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.reddit.com/r/help/comments/44498b/how_to_hide_or_filter_a_subreddi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/20 09:45 PM
14

I am still filtering out porn subreddits from my feed. There are so many of them. Honestly it has made my Reddit experience so much better. I highly recommend filtering your feed. Depending on what app/version of Reddit you use there's a way to filter out entire subs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/20 08:08 PM
7

Cats are at least soft and can have soothing purr rumbles. A warm cat it's excellent for mild period cramps. They just snuggle up and stay there for hours!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/20 08:51 PM
2

That's awesome! I hope to find the same one day!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/20 04:56 PM
6

Do not stress about this. Personal safety and health is a priority of a HVW. I do the same for similar reasons. I have unusual food allergies that are mild but unpleasant. I still find it hard at times to eat out. Coffee is easy for me. There's the issue of even if you compromise and find safe food, they could order food you can't consume. Then they want to touch you only they are coated in allergens. Face, mouth or fingers are all possible to dose you. If you disclose, then this could be avoide…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/20 03:58 PM
14

I think it only works if you propose that as the location. I prefer coffee dates because I actually like coffee. There's a great upscale cafe near me. I have had second dates after a coffee date. I have not been on a coffee date that I had to pay. Then again my love for coffee is real. So if a potential partner isn't willing to go along with me to something I enjoy, then there's no way I'd spend effort on him. It's a lowkey way for me to weed out lvm who will dismiss my hobbies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 09:04 PM
5

I agree. However it won't just disappear easily. So if a woman is going to be casual she can still be smart about choosing a partner. She shouldn't opt for the lowest value man. Plus the man that engages in casual relationships isn't a match for the long term relationship dating pool. So it may impact options overall but you wouldn't settle for LVM, in this case with lack of commitment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 07:13 PM
26

I completely agree. Yes casual sex happens but why would any woman want endless random casual sex? All the risk with very little rewards. Casual doesn't mean that you are ignoring your safety. It just means that you are ruling out emotional attachment. Even with casual you are still looking for HVM who will treat you like a human person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 01:57 PM
3

This is entirely valid. I've had the same thought myself. Mention of a death in the family and funeral explained his lack of time the past week. Under such circumstances I am hesitant to immediately call BS. Every other interaction has been good. I certainly haven't invested in one guy. Talking to others and seeing someone else Wednesday night. I can't wait around after all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 12:09 AM
3

I'm in a similar position. I find it hard to draw the line when the guy I went on a date with had great behavior. The workaholic trait though is a real conflict. However, I feel a red flag if I would have more face time with the cashiers at my local grocery store than a person that wants to date me. Brenda knows at least the same level of personal details and she started working there a few weeks ago. It's hard because you can't plan dates on your own. So if you are the only one putting in effor…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/20 05:21 AM
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