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watermelonstrong Archive

View 1 posts and 67 comments by watermelonstrong on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

I wouldnt go to the therapy session. Start working towards your divorce
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/26 02:50 PM
1

I feel like the advice to not move out is assuming home ownership. You're renting, honestly I'd advise you move out be the bigger man in this situation. Get off the current lease and find a new place. Kids can move with you if they want, or split between both parents , etc Men take more action than women I feel like. She may do nothing and drag her feet. If you start the process and move out you'll feel better for it. If you do nothing and both coexist in the toxic environment, paves the way for…
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/26 08:26 AM
3

I find people don't ask what happened? Friends and family, of course tell them / they already know what happened Even bumping in to an old acquaintance, I've found people don't ask. So I'm not sure what context this is for OP. But any way, id answer truthfully if anyone asked. My wife was having an affair. Why would I say any different? I'm fairly open about why my marriage ended, it's not a secret I hold
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/26 03:11 AM
2

It's so hard to see and understand this while you're living inside of it, but he is not the problem, your wife is. He is no doubt a piece of shit who doesn't deserve any good words whatsoever. Complete total piece of shit. But it's your wife that is causing harm to you and your family, including your kids. Id advise get a lawyer and start the divorce process asap. Find a way for you or her to move out to parents house etc during the seperation. Those are the two most immediate logistics. Start t…
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/26 04:57 PM
5

Just some advice bro. Youre posting on your profile not in subreddits, people arent really seeing those posts. Now the post at hand - she doesnt care. Leave her alone. Your posts are all over the place. She still has control over you. You need to actually cut her off and cease contact to move forward.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/26 04:13 AM
6

Damn good catch lmao
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/26 02:05 AM
1

>I don’t want to turn this post into a woman bashing; I know given what this sub is it’s probably a short journey though 😂this is a divorced men sub. If you're seeing women bashing, I'd say thats more on you than a reflection of what is actually happening here. We all have a mother, some of us have sisters, and daughters. Is this really just reduced down to women bashing because we are divorced? You're on your 2nd marriage and only now just realising perhaps natural roles and that women don't te…
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/26 02:04 PM
4

You'll be fine man. You may not see it now but you're doing the work. Crying is part of that. I felt the feelings, cried, did all that. I feel I'm a stronger and wiser man now on the other side of it.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 01:41 AM
11

>obviously I’ll eventually find a divorce attorney Incase things get sour You need a lawyer now, call on Monday
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 01:17 AM
3

I wouldve said the same at the start of my process, but not anymore. You cant stop a woman leaving, you cant change her mind. Show her the door, if she leaves she leaves
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/26 11:17 AM
1

No kids? Id guess for her, the marriage isn't really going anywhere . Women are always levelling up to the next stage. I don't post this to be hurtful
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/26 01:45 PM
10

Sure I did shit wrong and would do some differently next time. But honestly some people just aren't cut out for till death do us part. She's a party girl , got bored with 3 kids and a house and husband, had an affair (guy was 20 yrs older and unemployed) and now she isn't with him but she goes nightclubbing every other weekend without the kids So it doesn't fucken matter what I did wrong, I mean it might help me in the future if I want another relationship (I don't) But don't ever beat yourself …
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/25 04:07 AM
2

Your post isn't coherent
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 03:22 PM
6

>Separation was my call after years of silent treatment as conflict resolution and failed counseling. >Go ahead and bash me for the infidelity—I can take that. In fact, it's hard for me to understand her mentality on it. I know the truth of what actually happened, but she told her family I was having affairs left and right for the entire marriage 😂 cheaters say the most narcissistic shit lol
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/25 01:04 PM
23

>I'm 40, my ex wife is 29 >We were married 3 years, together for 9 Might be unpopular in this sub, but a 20yr old woman getting involed with a 31 year old man, recipe for disaster from the start. You were old enough back then to know not to seriously engage with a 20 year old
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/25 11:52 AM
3

Did you read his post? He's tried, she's done, gone. My position has changed quite a bit since I started my divorce process but it really takes two in a marriage. Fight and kick and scream for your marriage all you want but if the other person is done , it's time to call it a day and part ways
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/25 02:12 PM
16

not sure I'll ever trust another woman again. This is the way
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/25 08:21 AM
1

>I failed them and now im staring it in the face in the most real way I've ever felt. >I lost my family. I ruined it. >Im sitting in my own sorrows holding the smoking pistol that killed the life I was fortunate to have. What did you do bro.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/25 01:56 PM
1

I disagree, when they say they want a divorce, they want a divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/25 02:01 PM
21

You're the enemy, you're not part of her future, she has discarded you and you are now simply a threat to her finances and access to money, housing, children. You are no better than a criminal robbing her or assaulting her family in the street. You are a relic of the past, you are an obstacle to her future goals
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/25 03:36 AM
5

Lol a bit heavy handed, but I agree with the premise - don't do joint activities with your ex, period
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/25 04:14 AM
12

My mum died in April 2023 after a long illness. The wife started her affair in February, sucked him off for the first time in March. Found out all of this later on from AP's wife who had the messages etc. In March mum was rushed to hospital and I thought I thought she was going to die then. My wife met us in hospital, consoling me, being there for mum, you know like a family. Found out the timeline later on she and given this guy a blowjob the day before. It's just a betrayal I can't get my head…
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/25 07:41 AM
4

I assumed you were already divorced , reading the first part of your post , but you're actually still married to her? Not acceptable, and yeah the marriage is over.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/25 10:56 PM
12

As per this forum, the guys viewing her tiktok know this. Men know this. If someone wants to play with her, so be it, it'll happen. But no-one is simping and committing their lives in a rush to a divorced single mother. Don't stress over it. Mine is doing the same.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/25 07:09 AM
10

She won't care what you have to say Stay level headed and carry on with the legal process for child access and asset division, and all the rest Yes it's hard, but maintain the self control. You will lose out if you mouth off at her in any way, whether it's text or in person , she doesn't care about you or what you have to say
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/24 01:55 PM
6

Time, time and more time. You will 100% get there dude. You just need time and more time, trust me you will get there. I could have made your post 10 months ago, a year ago. Im one year separated now. I've gone through it all. I don't miss her. I only regret she destroyed the family unit, I always will, for the kids sake. But I don't give a shit what she's doing though, I don't pine for her at all. I'm moving on with my single dad life and genuinely looking forward to Christmas, the new year, al…
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/24 03:36 PM
2

2 years is a long time to still be feeling this way. I would suggest therapy or something, because by now 2 years later you should naturally have been able to grieve, cope, move on, etc, rather than still thinking of her I wouldnt often recommend therapy as I dont think its particularly useful, but 2 years in and youre stuck on this cycle, reddit wont be able to help with some magic comment that changes your psyche. I think you need some proper help to move in a different direction
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/24 05:59 AM
7

I empathise with this, but I don't think divorce men has the answers here There's a lot of challenges with special needs children as well which the average divorce men user here isn't privy to I'd suggest communication, communication. Get yourselves in to some sort of therapy or counselling to try open communication. Shutting down isn't really acceptable inside a marriage, or it's not really a marriage is it? Good luck
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 02:46 AM
1

I don't mean to be harsh, but maybe provide direction - if this is the kind of stuff you mull over in your mind, then post on reddit - should you acknowledge your anniversary to her while going through a divorce - it's kind of an indicator to me, an anonymous outsider, that you need to sort some shit out Maybe you are posting the question here because you don't have a strong friend network and you're just chatting to the void on reddit? If so, address that situation You might think I'm over anal…
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/24 01:51 PM
3

No dude. Come on. What kind of answer are you looking for with that question any way - do or dont and it doesn't matter a damn either way as it's so insignificant. If you do she won't care. If you dont she wont care. Best of luck
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/24 01:44 PM
1

This is not really of any help, but here in Australia we have child support (no alimony) if I lose my job tomorrow, I call centerlink (government) and immediately request re assessment , which will assess both of our incomes and adjust my payment. You can't squeeze blood from a stone, I don't understand paying alimony after losing your job for example. I assume in USA you would do much the same, contact the appropriate government branch yourself, no lawyers, and reassess your earning ability Lik…
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 08:46 AM
4

Dont go to the birthday party. Just have to suck it up that the birthday parties dad hosts won't have their school friends at them. Kids will still enjoy it. Get some balloons, cake, presents whatever and do your own birthday when you see the kids next. It's what a lot of us have to do. There's no more happy catch ups at joint events.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 11:49 PM
2

Yes I do call them, they have older hand me down android phones connected to WiFi only and sign in with a Google account managed with parental control. Kids with phones are 6 and 7 and my youngest is 2 and just joins them on the call. Facebook messenger has a kids version as well She had issued a false restraining order against me once I discovered her affair so I'd call our divorce high conflict. The kids are a bit young to have their own phone but it's pretty much fine with the parental contro…
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 02:10 AM
17

You know the answer already, stop the dog visitations Cut her out of your life. if/when you meet someone new, theres no room for the ex wife to pop around to see the dogs. Pretend you're at that stage now even if you arent. Its part of moving on
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/24 12:26 AM
3

I read your other posts, I don't understand how your marriage broke down? Or who left? I feel like that's important to why you feel this way Mine said the same shit to me, at a bar one night by herself during our last month together. That one of the band members was talking to her and wanted her number. I was like, well I hope you told him you have a husband at home? Shortly after that I found out about her 7 month affair (with someone else, the bar/band guy was nothing). So, shit like that does…
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/24 03:15 PM
2

Reading this on paper, yes it looks like she's trying to get back together with you. If you don't want that, that's fine don't do the family catch ups. If you do want it, id suggest an actual date, have the kids stay at grandparents/ babysitter. Getting back together wouldn't be achieved by having lots of family functions I know you said you don't want to get back, and she called the police, etc. but there's my 2 cents if you do go down that road
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/24 03:28 AM
8

Wtf is this lifestyle you've got yourself in to? Sort this out, talk to your daughter, live in the main house. Sorry to say these words but, man up a bit. You're living like a mouse in the basemrnt of your own home writing sad journals. Show your daughter and soon to be ex that you're a man and a father and get out of that basement
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 04:40 AM
6

I don't mean disrespect, but I'll just come out and say you 30 and her 47 it's not a good match. Give yourself time, grow from this and see what life offers you ahead. Get back out there if you can. You're clearly still dreamy and fawning over her, just give yourself time to kill that off and come back stronger
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/24 03:13 PM
9

The past doesn't matter to a woman. The good years don't matter. They can switch off and throw it all away after feeling bad for a week or two. I guess men can do this too, but I mean we're on a divorce men sub here right so we see it a lot. I love women, id love to be loved again, but it's too fickle. Once the spark and dopamine are gone and you're in routine regular life, she goes away for a week long trip and is excited by a new stranger, you have now become worthless dogshit to her. Its just…
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/24 06:39 AM
3

That's not how that part works unfortunately
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 04:04 AM
1

I understand the relationship is over for you, I'm just saying very dangerous situation here with lots of people involved and getting hurt. This other husband doesn't want to lose his wife. Like.. you do understand this right? Take a break from her and separate from your wife. Your friend / girlfriend should take action in her marriage as well. Whether that's leave her husband or stay, but it's outside of your purview. She isn't going to be your savior, you shouldn't be going to a married woman …
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/24 02:21 AM
9

You're playing a dangerous game. You broke up your own marriage and you're contributing to breaking up someone else's. You seem surprised the other husband is not taking this laying down? Just.. finish up your own marriage first, then date non married people. You're just being an asshole right now. It's not going to work out between you and this other girl anyway if/when you both end up separated. You're just being a child "dating" while both still married. It's not special it wont last. Be a ma…
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/24 12:56 AM
14

In my mind theres 2 versions, like, I feel like I'd go crazy if I had to rewrite my history and my own life. There was the version of her that was good - my girlfriend, then wife, then mother of my children. We had good years. But its a different person now. And I'm allowed to look back fondly on the good times of my life, dating, raising kids, without associating that with this new family destroying cheating whore she's become. Not all stories end well, but up until a certain point it was a goo…
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/24 06:06 AM
7

Want to brush my teeth in the morning I like the person looking back at me. I know that person is honor and integrity. I don't know how people can live any other way. Well said, I have no idea what my ex sees - a cheating slut who threw her marriage, house and family away for nothing. Must be some mental gymnastics to reconcile all of it. Anyway, sounds like you're still living together? Change that arrangement ASAP. Live with family if you have to. She will get a restraining order or worse if y…
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 03:00 PM
2

Excellent write up
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/24 02:09 AM
7

Geez I'm so battle hardened by my own divorce and stuff I read on this sub, Divorce sub etc. If you're both that unhappy, I mean yep time to call it quits. It's just sad to read stories like this at this point. Maybe when I was more optimistic, younger, more love in my heart? Before all this shit? I'd suggest counselling or blah fucken blah. But truth be told when the woman hates you like you're describing, and you're not reciprocating much better, the love and marriage you had is already in the…
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/24 02:19 PM
3

You've got to move on somehow, we can't really help here with much advice in the sense that you just need to move on emotionally get your shit straight and fight for more access to kids She has a new boyfriend, shes not amicable to you seeing your kids more, she doesn't care about you so stop pining for her and separate the two Your wife and the good times did exist and you're free to look back at that fondly, but it's a different person now and you have to let go. And we can't help with that. B…
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 11:58 PM
13

I cant, Id like to, but I cant, in all good conscious. She had an affair for 7 months under my roof. In my bed. She isnt with him now and never will be. She had a false restraining order issued once I discovered the affair. Im out of my own home I still pay my share of the mortgage on. I cant communicate like a human being, under legal restrictions. Why would I entertain mothers day gifts? Thats what her family and the school are good for. Plus any future man she brings along. Its a miracle I ha…
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/24 02:15 PM
6

I have kids, and when Im level headed and sober I have different phases. 90% of the time Im satisifed Im alone now, away from someone who obviously hated me so much and had no regard for me, to have an affair under our roof. The other 10% of the time Im frustrated and miss her for the sake of the family and raising our kids together, thats all gone. But if Im feeling lonely especially after a couple of drinks, I just miss her, period. Not considering the kids, I just miss her. Her company, her t…
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 12:26 PM
5

From what I'm interpreting, you've tried to reconcile more than once with this other guy in the picture? I've been cheated on and it's flipped the word love upside down and inside out for me. I don't know what love is or if it's real. But what I do know is she doesn't love you. And wont stay with you or be loyal to you. There's this fuckwit guy in the picture, and if not him, someone else eventually. Just not you. Your time together has already ended. Im reflecting my own mirror here but it's pa…
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 02:15 PM
5

Im not hearing of any abuse or cheating. Stay true to your vows and loyal to your wife. Your feels and the grass looking greener isnt real. Stick by your family
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/24 01:50 PM
2

Oh I understand mate I'm in a similar situation, she has a false restraining order against me, and up until recently I wasnt able to leave my car at kid pickup/dropoff time. She would open my passenger side door and slam the kids bags inside while muttering how horrible I am, while I had to look the other way (so as to not break any orders, in case shes filming me etc) So.. I get it, and my advice to you isnt just for this situation with her having the mobile phone in your sons face. I think you…
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/24 02:15 PM
2

Pretty toxic if you're both at this stage of a breakdown in communication - the body cam seems ok to me, but her with the mobile phone doesnt make sense and is traumatizing for kids. I wouldnt bother saying anything to her. I'm in Australia so my advice is catering to my legal system, but something along these lines Try get a restraining order against her, if possible More likely - get a court ordered parenting plan that stipulates against this bullshit she's pulling with recording with the mobi…
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/24 02:00 PM
8

yeah that shits me. Im stuck with remembering all the good (as well as the bad at the end) She somehow, whether due to ADHD, BPD or willful ignorance, cannot remember any good times. Its as if she was kidnapped one day and forced to marry me and buy a house and have 3 kids and then sobered up out of it.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/24 01:23 PM
10

Yeah I wanted to reply to this, but ill just piggyback off this one so this guy has 13 years, 2 kids. Go get the divorce, go find that greener grass, spend another X years and find out the spark is gone and go through the divorce process again Id love to have been given a chance to work at our marriage, but mine cheated and didnt want to reconcile. OP the grass is NOT greener, its just more grass
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/24 10:18 AM
6

So sorry to hear this. Stay strong one day at a time and you will reunite with your kids eventually. My story is nothing like yours but I use this to get through some of the hard times - that the things we do and go through now are our story, and when your kids are old enough to understand and care about this stuff, you were in the right here. On all fronts. As a parent, a father, a man, you were the "good" one and she simply wasn't. You will always have that
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/24 03:58 AM
4

I was there, I think we all were, and yes to reiterate it does get better. Time and more time. Sounds simple but it does work because there's no alternative anyway. You will feel better, maybe not today or this week or next month even, but soon
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 11:31 PM
6

I mean without knowing more or the full story, yeah go back. Uphold your vows. I don't hear that she's a cheater, I hear an alcohol problem you admit she is addressing, and lack of effort, which is fairly vague for us internet randoms to interpret and give advice I would give anything back for my family. From what you said she's trying. Now it's your turn. Again just my advice without the full picture. That said I'm going to make some assumptions - you no longer respect or love her. If so, remem…
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 01:35 PM
3

Ive had to move 50 mins drive away to live (in my dad's house) I have them every second weekend, but I can't do 50/50 - I can't get them to school in the morning and home in the afternoon with their school and juggle my job It's easy for her, the school is 3 mins drive away. So yeah I concur. I see the 50/50 mentioned a lot but sometimes the logistics just don't add up. If I lived around the corner I would do 50/50 but I need to try get back in to the housing market and may take me 10+years befo…
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/24 02:02 AM
9

Focus on yourself and the kids, I'd say remove the ladies from the equation. If it happens it'll happen I'm a bit biased though, I'm 35 going through this and couldn't care less about meeting another woman ever again. If it's part of your own roadmap then sure I guess location matters Me personally I'm done, I mean, it would be nice if it just happens one day but it's not something I'm aiming for and doesn't guide my decisions. If I meet someone during my journey to home ownership (as a single d…
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/24 01:41 AM
5

Honestly, it may be better to pay for a couple of hours of tech support and let someone run amok on your computer and phone. Sit with the guy of course. They'll find all your email accounts, whats syncing where, what backup recovery is set, etc.. ​ I work in IT so this was my bread and butter, I have / had access to a lot of stuff she didn't know about (not hacking, just shared out to me) ​ This post is VERY useful information to consider, and I'd take it a step further and pay some good IT supp…
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/24 09:57 AM
5

Heavy stuff, so that aside, let's discuss the points here. I don't see mention of any kids- you've got a leg up on a lot of other men here. Your path to healing is a bit more straightforward. I see you mention here and on other comments you're an 8/10 and she's a 4-5/10? I mean that's a shit thing to say, assuming you're talking looks, and probably plays a big part in your divorce Lastly, of course don't kill yourself, and don't post it for attention either. Get some help dude. The gym is good, …
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 11:52 PM
0

You're the dad? Why are all your posts on mom and pregnancy Reddits? If you're a woman that's fine, just a bit odd coming here for the divorced men's perspective, as if it will be any different here lol Anyway to answer your question, my son has medication for ADHD. Typically we have more than enough to spare so I keep a pack at my house. I think you'll find there's plenty to spare having some at both houses.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 02:57 PM
2

Not sure I understand, so you're selling the 4 bedroom house, she gets an apartment, and you're buying a new place? Where are the kids primarily going to stay? With her in the apartment? Anyway, you'll be fine. You've got the advantage of time to even post this and think about things. You're a man, kids father, you'll be fine empty house or no. I didn't have the benefit, discovered her affair, 6 weeks of failed reconciliation later and she got a false restraining order issued against me and I wa…
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 11:41 AM
1

Pickup Friday afternoon after-work, return home Sunday Because I now have to live 60km, 50mins drive from their house. I can't get them to school in the morning from where I am now, and make it to work. It's just too far. For perspective from our family home the school was 3mins drive away
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 06:28 AM
11

Yes she saw a therapist, at least one session maybe two max, back in May. She invited me to come but something inside me said no this is her fight, I was a good man with not much to do about whatever she was going through. I didn't make that decision lightly, I thought on it, and decided she should go on her own. She was screaming divorce and unhappiness since about Feb. Well in September I found out about her affair (which she admitted to the therapist) which started in Feb. And glad I didn't g…
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/24 11:00 AM
6

Not paranoid at all. Very smart man in fact. As soon as a woman says she is unhappy or direction or divorce, it was over 5 moves ago. I know this might be hard to hear but it's our learned experience. Take council now.
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/24 10:05 AM
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