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yolo_tomassi Archive

View 3 posts and 230 comments by yolo_tomassi on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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4

Too much room for interpretation for consensus on this stuff. Just to play devils advocate: At The Jacobim Mugatu School for Supervillains Who Want to Literally Enslave Mankind by Force I learned to do good things like: give employment & a sense of purpose to the disenfranchised apply cutting edge technology to effect change on a global scale how to keep captivated predatory animals truly happy push forward the field of laser surgery manage and scale an organization from grass roots to global in…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 07:53 PM
2

"Pro choice-woman & Pro financial-abortion man trade rhetoric." https://thumbs.gfycat.com/SparklingPeacefulAtlanticridleyturtle-mobile.mp4
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 07:24 PM
1

mine's definitely a pain in the ass. May be worth the effort sometimes but personally I just end up going for the big perfect cube trays with boiled distilled water.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 06:29 PM
1

yeah I agree how necessary it is, but if say 80% of women don't do it, then they're still not exposed to the mechanics despite not being attractive. Just wondering though really, I have no idea how often that happens but suspect it's the default way it plays out considering.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 05:47 PM
1

oh it's absolutely not always malicious, I'm definitely of the whole "we're always manipulating each other all the time and it's definitely not all malicious" school of thought, though there's a big variable on how aware we are of it at different times. The woman in your post is def overgeneralizing and apparently unaware of this though.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 05:42 PM
1

Yeah I wonder how much reaction to RP comes from women knowing what their own emotional experience of "getting what she wants out of a male" is like and wanting none of that shit near their own heart.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 04:18 PM
3

I do wonder how common it is for unattractive women to engage in wooer mode when they aren't the wooed rather than just "learn to live with it" and still not experience what wooer mode is like.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 04:12 PM
2

The concept of strategy inherently pollutes the idea of genuine emotional connection for a lot of people. Incidentally you can also shoot yourself in the foot with it too - there really is a tipping point between something genuine you're doing and "just running the algorithm". It's yours to manage. She could also be projecting her own use of 'strategy' Sometimes I wonder if there's a relationship between someone's own use of strategy and manipulation and their reaction to seeing it used for some…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 04:03 PM
1

casual sex: best movie I've seen in the last 6 months continuous ltr sex: one or more whole seasons of really good show on netflix I guess for a lot of women casual sex is like above but the cinema's in a dodgy part of town and you have to pick your film by the title/poster only once you're there.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 03:38 PM
1

lol the lack of oxford comma at the end really makes this
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 07:03 PM
3

Heh I think this post's pointless aggression might be an actual example of "toxic masculinity".
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 06:24 PM
2

I mean, whatever else his posts are they are good lightning rods for counter-argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 04:20 PM
1

Pinkers' work on violence (better angels of our nature) showed that there's a pretty good correlation between pathological terminology (vermin, disease, snakes etc) and some pretty nasty treatment (trying to avoid going full godwin here) and it's inflammatory cause it may not be the same ballpark but its definitely the same sport.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 04:12 PM
8

You're burying the points in your post in so much disrespect it's really really hard work to take it seriously. I think you'd get some real mileage out of re-evaluating that strategy. It's not the high-roading you think it is. To answer the question I basically had to assume was at the core of this rant - I have a problem with 'toxic masculinity' as a rallying meme for misandry. I don't care about it in the way you define it, I care about what it does when amplified and twisted by commercialized…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 04:04 PM
2

What framework are you getting these labels for relationships/attachments from? Asking for a friend...
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 02:42 PM
1

That wacky 80/20 space thread got me thinking about the whole apex fallacy/invisible men thing & I remembered that "Moon" is a great ad absurdum sci-fi story with these themes: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twuScTcDP_Q
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 05:07 AM
1

feel like theres a good fast women joke in here somewhere but too drunk...
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 04:40 AM
1

Oh my god dude pretty big leap from "women reported higher levels of incivility from other women than their male counterparts" to "Women are bigger assholes than men". What constitutes asshole? What constitutes bigger? How are women more or less sensitive to getting shit from each gender? How much does "incivility" depend on intention? Making massive simple leaps like this is going to lead you deeper into a miserable world - you have to do better.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/18 10:58 PM
5

Mostly the way the observations are explained or instantiated. Like I def believe in alpha/beta distinction - to me it's so trivially true that male groups are typically arranged around some sort of leader that it almost doesn't bear discussion. What I disagree with is that that guy has to be some rustic individualist Ron Swanson wet dream caricature for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/18 08:35 PM
3

Not disagreeing with your assessment but answering "why is this so hard to understand."
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/18 05:22 PM
8

hurr durr feminism is about equality for EVERYONE!!! Seriously though I'd say its even simpler than that - it's just straight up a womens' special interest group that doesn't even have to be consistent in its own premises. Like people want thing a, maybe for reason x, but premise y supports it too so they add that to the argument list. Then along comes thing b that people want. Suddenly premise y happens to be an argument against it. An individual can keep these somewhat consistent but a whole g…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/18 04:51 PM
3

Prime means best part of your own life curve - men in their prime are still going to be subjective to womens' selective nature in a way that women simply aren't.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/18 03:35 PM
1

I'm not sure that's true if I understand what you're saying - take predators and herbivores. Natural selection doesn't work on an "is an herbivore or predator better" but more like, 'this given environment & resources will resolve to some ratio of predators to herbivores that turns out to be the stable one'. What sort of space colony are people expecting is going to happen 5 yrs down the road populated by 80 perpetually pregnant women with say conservatively 160 children to care for and just 20 …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/18 03:26 PM
1

I think a converse argument here may be something like "back when I was a beta bitch" stories come from men's lives for whom EWALT is true. edit: I def think that the real gold to be mined from AWALT is "There's a good chance that for your life Enough Women Are Like That, so find out and RP will probably help with that." I think having to have "what do we really mean by AWALT" arguments all the time is a liiittle bit of a case of play stupid games win stupid prizes for using such a hyperbolic te…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/18 05:16 PM
1

I think it's something to do with the notion of objective/universal truth and where people source their notion of it. Like STEM is almost entirely built on "stuff that no one can disagree with" so the more of your own world that's populated by that stuff the easier it makes it to think (feel?) that "stuff I hear all the time in my culture" is just as universally true.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/18 04:51 PM
1

Can't change your view there man - def why I'm purple though to be fair this is more I think a property of tribes/ideologies than of "The Red Pill".
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/18 03:44 PM
5

[pretend automod] https://i.imgur.com/eNS3AZl.gif
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/18 02:27 AM
5

Why do you think we didn't evolve to the 80/20 ratio?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 10:54 PM
1

If you think there's value in talking about something I hope you put it on the table. Remember henry ford's quote: “If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses.” Here's the thing, you never really get to know if what you're saying is just drivel or pearls to swine when you get the tumbleweeds. Hopefully truly saying what you think needs to be said gives you enough peace to balance that out. You can hopefully use those tumbleweeds as feedback & try again & decide fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 06:46 PM
1

I agree waking up to all that stuff is an experience worthy of what the term means. But still the term applies to just about any awakening from mental frameworks - those guys made the choice to use the term's gravitas & global relatablility & resonance. It's that same thing that causes confusion. It's just overreaching in the subject matter it can apply to. I honestly really like seeing it spread to other topics cause I think that it helps people be more critical of ideas they're bought into.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 06:38 PM
1

To be fair using such a universal term is overreaching & deserving of some confusion. I can't run around calling my movement "education" and just be teaching bowling without expecting to have to explain it a few times.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 06:01 PM
1

yeah they shot themselves in the foot with that one
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 05:58 PM
1

Honestly the stuff I think you're talking about is super useful way of sorting out stuff like AxALT vs APALT so I think you should just do it. If you want to discuss some concept like "all reasoning is motivated." I'd just say go for it and tie it to how both male & female hamstering works. Sorting something like that would be a nice step away from people accusing each other of gender specific bullshit. Just do it man.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 05:47 PM
2

Whatever the answer turns out to be I think it's need to provide some sense of meaning & sense of value for people like this outside of female validation & family providership. Like setting up some sort of healthy version of MGTOW embedded in mainstream culture. Also something something improve mental health culture.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 02:31 AM
4

Yeah it's easy to armchair quarterback others' love life when you're not the one who has to live it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 01:10 AM
1

Yeah finding that shit out can be a bit of a shocker depending on how you're raised & how much of your life you've invested in that plan.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 01:08 AM
2

yeah I'm interested in what your red pill is and my red pill is. Mine and the bitterness I've seen is kind of having been sold some sort of lie about the income/stability/family man thing. I think it's generational maybe. Like it'll just take a generation or two for marriage 1.0 to really soak out.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 12:48 AM
8

This is one well known redpiller's answer I think https://krauserpua.com/2010/11/21/defining-higher-beta/ I've often heard in redpill circles 'higher beta' literally defined as 'the sort of guy you want your daughter to marry' I think rpw also aim for higher beta. I feel like you're trying to expose the idea that RP men are encouraging themselves & each other to be the sort of men they'd keep away from the women that they love. This is a big root of RP angst - the idea that women want to bang me…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 09:15 PM
1

No one wants to be uncool and say teacher.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 07:39 PM
3

relevant xkcd: https://xkcd.com/927/ I think the reason why people try to salvage the terms/distinction is that everyone seems to have their own version that fits in some sort of meaningfully useful way in their worldview... For example just because "good table service" isn't backed by some ISO standard doesn't mean it's a useless term in day to day life/discussion or that its a garbage concept. It just means you have to treat it with a grain of salt which sadly is the sort of healthy behaviour …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 07:07 PM
2

This is the poster that the adult entertainment industry is going to use to bring the teacher industrial complex to it's knees and take over childcare forever: https://imgur.com/a/9nEo1
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 06:18 PM
1

Sort of agree with this? It's hard to pin this stuff on the red pill itself as a set of descriptions of how things work because a lot of what you're saying is referring to the mindset of an individual. That being said do I think that mindset is ocurring in like 80% of redpillers, yeah there's a super good chance of that and you're describing a super legit paradox.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 06:00 PM
4

Yeah one thing that I think really contributes to infidelity is how well a couple are dialed in in terms of what they feel is reasonable "passion decay". I forget where but there was some super good description I read on here about sex as a connective experience and how intrinsic that is to long term relationships compared to sex as a passion/lust experience. and how smoothly the transition went was a great indicator of the health of the relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 05:52 PM
2

I guess my core argument would be that the confusion comes from varying definitions of those terms between individuals rather than their relatedness. Just for example for me assertive categorically excludes obnoxiousness, it intrinsically includes the social adaptation component or else it just -is- obnoxiousness, which in turn categorically ties it to "social skills". So in a discussion each person's going to have their own little network of these terms, and once you mix in people's tendency to…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 05:27 PM
0

A fun thing here is if you gender flip it and write it 3 times it summons Pat Robertson. How can a woman who was impregnated by a man she regrets blame anyone but herself? She already knew the possible outcome. Sure he could have lied about vasectomy. That's terrible. But unless (I can't understand this sentence - did you mean sperm?) she knows there is a possibility of him getting her pregnant. So she shouldn't have any recourse and take full blame for her actions.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/18 01:49 AM
2

But she asked for REALITY!
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 11:06 PM
1

Both are happening but people so far don't seem to want to make distinctions between the degrees of harm being done, because they think it somehow makes it ok, or is guided by some sort of "give them an inch they'll take a mile" mentality.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 09:54 PM
1

If she's very good at a particular sex act or two or three, she's very likely that good IRL. first premise can't be verified from a video because the result is in the recipients experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 09:43 PM
8

This convo is going to be a selection biased nightmare. Also from your last line you should have probably tagged this Q4W.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 09:32 PM
3

This seems like this guy's discovered a bunch of negative patterns that can happen and has stitched them together into some sort of frankenstein's monster woman. Here I'll do it with regular people and food: "Satan's Garbage Disposal" There is a type pf person who, when the circumstances are right, will do almost anything - hurt, steal, or kill in order to feed their never ending hunger. Sure when they've temporarily satisfied (and trust me this is only ever temporary) they can be very polite, f…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 08:39 PM
1

couple things going on here, Your male examples are sufficiently high quality to make [less demanding, they nag less, they are less jaded] satiated/disappear in almost any average woman. Elon Musk for example is -literally- and realistically breaking the notion of 'the sky's the limit'. If that doesn't satiate any woman's desire for ambition & achievement in a partner. I'm not sure what will. Another thing is that love relies on being able to relate, and in the cases of these super examples abov…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/18 06:28 PM
9

I think there's a difference between acknowledging privately in-tribe that theoretically men's perspective has to be taken into account and doing it publicly tribe-wide. Ceding time at the wheel to the outgroup rubs so deeply against so many people's cores. I imagine most feminists have bigger (valid) fish to fry than giving men #metoo airtime. I mean that in the sense of active dialogue rather than just passively allowing men to write about it elsewhere. It's a little like hearing all the old w…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 05:48 PM
3

Listening intently would be sufficient Is exactly how a programmer would express a solution.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 05:04 PM
4

Yeah a real ironic trap here is that doing the dishes doesn't actually resolve the emotional disconnect. No amount of dishwashing based on "OK I'll do it cause its important to you." or whatever actually solves "I want you to WANT to do dishes!" Wanting to do them does, which is a whooole different thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 10:41 PM
1

Yeah your two first paragraphs match my own experience perfectly. A trap that I fell into at the beginning of our relationship is through lack of interest or confidence or women-are-wonderful effect, is blindly adopting her standard as the gold standard. Looking at it that way stopped it from reading as a compatibility mismatch but instead as "whelp gotta try harder for the wife cause I'm not good enough". Now trying to untangle like a decade of resentment that's been built up on both sides ther…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 08:29 PM
1

Great explanation, I'll add that this is totally supported by the way our neurology works, in the sense that the entirety of our brains work on neural networks being brought closer or further away from a firing threshold, which is why terms like 'tipping point' are so resonant. edit: another fun variable here is being on the same page about what constitutes 'fair share'
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:15 PM
1

I assume you're talking about infidelity being the behaviour that slut shaming prevents.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 05:27 PM
1

Dude your simulation is missing like a million variables. Like the internal psychology hurting a relationship regardless of ability to execute, ability to execute without getting caught, attitude about marriage to name a few.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 05:17 PM
0

It's unfortunate but there's enough "messaging" out there that men can form the idea. I think the core of it is a basic problem solving approach that if your SO's go-to reason for lack of sex is stress & fatigue, if you take that at face value & genuinely want to sort that out for her and then do it then in theory sex "should" resume. What's just as likely unfortunately is that it's not the real reason, just the most graceful thing she can muster in the heat of any given moment, so the whole neg…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 04:49 PM
3

Well there's "Even the champ gets punched in the face." vulnerable, and there's "Wow even though that dude trains a lot he should probably avoid barfights." vulnerable. I've only really seen people react well to the first kind.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/18 06:00 PM
1

Well honestly if you have enough competency/status you can believe whatever the fuck you want to believe, that includes anything ranging from thetan counts to "the one".
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/18 03:47 PM
1

I'd fund the shit out of genetic research to free us from our outdated firmware. Not sure how far reaching an answer you want but may as well aim high.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/18 03:29 PM
8

don't have the links to hand etc but iiuc one was "pushing my head down towards your exposed penis" while they were in a consensual relationship (according to the accuser) and the other was that someone didn't feel they had the choice to say no to a contracted nude scene. I think its ambiguous whether the 'no' in question was to the contract or to the scene after the contract was signed.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/18 06:09 PM
0

Here's my problem with this - half the purpose of critical thinking is to prevent taking on board stuff that resonates with you. Flat-earthers read a ton of shit and are skeptical AF and are operating on the above principle. To be fair none of us have any other real choice for operating in the world, but I'm just pointing out that it doesn't allow you to determine accuracy. That takes the kind of proof that OP is noting a lack of. I think one of the biggest community problems with RP is that by …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/18 04:27 PM
1

ah yeah I meant paycheck proportion
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/17 06:57 PM
2

proportion as in % of each paycheck not % of the shared expenses.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/17 06:05 PM
4

Yeah this is exactly what the whole proportional paycheck contribution thing solves. We do this and it works great.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/17 04:00 PM
0

yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/17 02:59 PM
1

Yeah that's sort of why I said rationale rather than excuse, and whether it's true or not. In some sense there is no truth to it, there's only what the two people think & say to you about it and what you think about it. I think what I mean is that pretty much no one who ever hurt someone else didn't feel justified doing it. We have a history filled with what people felt was right that's just drenched in blood. Pretty much the only thing that stops this kind of thing is repercussions from a third…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/17 04:37 PM
4

why does it even matter why someone cheated? The bottom line is they cheated, they did it and that is an awful thing to do, in what situation is the excuse going to make it better? Man I wish everyone thought (felt?) like this. Bottom line is at some gut level people can pretty easily find a rationale for harming someone whatever the form takes & whether it's True™ or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/17 12:47 AM
2

yet here you are
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/17 07:28 PM
1

aah ok yup lol
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/17 07:13 PM
1

How?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/17 07:02 PM
7

"Guys aren't you listening I said it's NOT a pyramid scheme!"
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/17 05:17 PM
1

It's acceptable because you support your friend when she's going through a divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/17 01:35 AM
1

Keeping this question in my pocked to diffuse rogue AI situations...
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/17 11:59 PM
1

I think it's more like stuff that shows up as endearing in the early days turns into 'flaws' once the early relationship magic wears off.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/17 11:57 PM
1

Where do I apply for one of those?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/17 10:16 PM
2

maybe I'm getting lefts & rights mixed up here but isn't this an invitation to get backhanded again but with the unclean hand as a double-insult?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/17 12:01 AM
3

Yeah I'm using the term in a layman sense as a label for another thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/17 11:56 PM
9

*Puts on tinfoil evopsych hat I think if you look at the theoretical tribe hierarchy that we seem to be emotionally wired for: leadership > precious cargo (women & children) > worker bees I think you get women who don't bat an eye at receiving care from worker bees, sort of in the same way you don't bat an eye at the friendliness of wait staff, it's just kindof expected and there's nothing malicious going on. I think this is what happens more like the auto-pilot default behaviour that shows up w…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/17 04:52 PM
1

Responsibility for something without the ability to affect it is a fundamentally insane proposition. It can only ever be a prescription for how one should use power that does exist. I think something like MGTOW are a shedding of responsibility due to the shifts in power you described. Of course there's the whole mess of toxic baggage that those guys bring with them around it which clouds the issue a bit for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/17 04:15 PM
2

Probably things like boy scouts, male sports teams etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/17 10:49 PM
2

Man I totally will once I live in europe again I'll totally hop over there. Really want to explore the electronic music culture in Germany.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/17 10:38 PM
2

I love them but it's because I love music so much - the nightclubs are just where it's at besides concerts.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/17 04:56 PM
1

oh shit I absolutely remember that movie saw it multiple times as a kid
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/17 06:08 PM
3

Honestly years therapy & meds worked for me. There's a massive overlap between clinical depression & incel mindset. The counseling + meds are what actually enabled a huge amount of standard advice to actually work and for me to execute. Blackpill mindset is firmly in the rearview and has been for close to a year now. Remember that it enables you to do the work rather than doing the work for you but the bright side is if you get your depression solved then all that work should weigh a lot less an…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/17 06:24 PM
2

Seriously even just posting this probably helped a lot. It's not actually what you end up 'doing' as much as seeing that -someone, anyone- seems to genuinely care. This is the kind of shit that pulls people back off ledges.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/17 11:44 PM
1

My wife and I do this and it works great for us - we pay 50% of our paychecks into a joint account and use that for shared stuff, boring and fun. I worry I'm BB a lot because of our DB & I definitely feel more like a piece of infrastructure than a partner in a lot of ways. I can't think of a fairer way of handling money though really. I also don't think choosing to split things that way were the cause of the problems, nor would changing it fix them. A huge turning point for me was noticing that …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/17 06:31 AM
1

What culture are you from?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/17 06:15 AM
2

Well frankly a woman's career choice doesn't entitle her to my money & I don't think anyone really enjoys being 'used' for anything. Your question is missing a lot of variables. Whether there's any real connection between the two people in question. What she "needs" the money for - is it a child? Is it his child? Are they married? Is it for a drink? Is it for gas to go visit her cancer ridden grandmother? How big is the income gap? Why does she 'deserve' his money even if she doesn't have a stel…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/17 09:02 PM
1

https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=a96_1413683127
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/17 10:57 PM
1

hah yeah was like uh yeah usually with drinks & banter & subtle jokes late in the evening and... oh wait you were asking how I game...
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/17 09:21 PM
1

Can't agree with this enough - it's such an easy labyrinth to get lost in
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/17 09:10 PM
1

I think the scarier notion is that the belonging isn't fake but rather it's real and centred around a bunch of horrible shit. Human tribal algorithm working as designed.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/17 04:15 PM
1

I'm explaining the pattern not the scale. It's just garden variety tribalism that spreads via normal ways human beings work and crazy shit can emerge from that. I think a huge amount of suffering in this world comes from people assuming horrible shit comes from outlier pathology instead of people "working as designed" because it allows the same stuff to go unchecked when it's happening in ourselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/17 04:46 PM
1

it's not so much healthy or not healthy its more that these things are patterns that emerge from basic features of how we work - in the same sense that nazism in germany wasn't some special collection of unhealthy people - it was kindof a 'storm' coming from basic features of humanity like the need for certainty, the default illusion of monolithic truth and tribalizing around it, othering etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/17 04:01 PM
1

I thought the purge was over?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/17 03:57 PM
5

I think that people with higher incomes are probably happier to announce it. (full disclosure - still trying to disentangle pay from my identity)
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/17 02:25 AM
3

Well pretty much nothing that gets bought from our joint account goes to her alone. that's the point. it's all stuff that we both share and that I benefit from. I'm not paying for her gas or car repairs or whatever. I'm paying for a nicer place that I live in, trips that I want to go on. If I want some new music gear I pay for that, if she wants a wardrobe upgrade she pays for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/17 10:06 PM
6

purple pill, $100k, wife somewhere north of $60k Wife works a professional job we both put 50% of our paychecks into a joint account that we use for shared costs like rent/utilities/groceries/ nights out that we're both on. The other 50% goes into our personal accounts for us to handle how we want. Sometimes that includes taking the other out etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/17 06:28 PM
1

Cookies are overrated
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/17 03:37 AM
2

my god yes - I swear it has a timespace continuum all to itself
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/17 02:26 AM
8

It's also likely that the good looking people are happier to post their pics so the sample is probably skewed there.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/17 02:09 AM
1

devin townsend - kingdom hecq - bête noire einstürzende neubauten - sabrina covenant - 20hz the beatles - tomorrow never knows
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/17 01:53 AM
2

don't worry man that'll all still be true when you come down!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/17 05:57 PM
3

Jesus I didn't know Steven Seagal was on these forums!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/17 11:53 PM
5

Uh... You should explain your sexual desires to them when you're in the bedroom like a normal person?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/17 11:04 PM
1

If you trying to make someone else do the work to your standards when they don't value what they're doing then yeah you're not going to get sparkly smiles from them. And if you're working to your own standard why are you expecting thanks for it? I mean it's fine to classify that type of work with a name but that doesn't mean someone else has to value it. If you can't own your own values & standards for something then you've got a little growing up to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/17 08:55 PM
1

I'm an ENFP who thought I was INFP for a long time but the "I" turned out to be depression. I was a classic "just be yourself" bp in my younger days and totally experienced being loved "for who I was". I think romantically successful XNFP's are maybe what explains the whole skinny jeans rocker appeal or maybe something like loki's appeal vs' thor.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/17 07:26 PM
1

Wow it's really cool to hear another story about this sort of thing - it really illustrates how this plays out & how strong the pressures that form us really can be. My MIL also did the lightbulb washing thing. Her husband also was a dick & enforced food prep standards etc too. They had cleaning people come in but there was always a big cleanup operation before the cleaners came which my wife told me stories about. This was in Prague & Moscow in the 70's/80's. In terms of feminine/masculine and …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/17 03:38 PM
2

Yeah I tend to agree with the universal elements of culture thing. I think what I was thinking about there was that I personally don't see it nearly as much in the liberal anglosphere. However what's interesting, is seeing how it re-expresses itself in culture that's departed from traditionality. I like this post cause I think it's doing exactly that. Like "Women just wanting to be clean, and men being lazy" - I think is partly that, partly just garden variety marketing catering to the tendency …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/17 05:28 PM
2

Oh man a lot of this is actually overt with my wife and I. For her it's definitely a 'role' which her mother brought her up with pretty adamantly. Her mom kept the place so unbelievably spotless and sterile that she suffers from a whole spectrum of allergies (oddball instance of literal toxic femininity?) now. It's really sad and I resent her mother quite a bit for the way she raised/treated my wife. In this case it seems to be pretty culture borne - she's eastern european/russian and it was exp…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/17 04:34 PM
1

I think you're half right - it came from that first and then got codified into what constitutes female status in traditional culture, and now we're on our way out of traditional culture we're kindof flailing around trying to figure out what's still relevant
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/17 04:20 PM
1

Yeah I do a fair chunk - Saturdays we clean up the place and put in about equal effort. She cooks, I do the dishes/sort the kitchen. She handles finance I handle computers & managing the yard. We both handle our own car issues. That being said my wife had what was basically an emotional affair with my ex best friend who is a 'rusting cast iron with months old grease collected in it is a normal thing' level slob so housework (which I really don't like) has been pretty severed from any connection …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/17 05:06 PM
2

Yeah I think you've described there the healthy model of what goes on & all the issues come from stuff like the guy just being too timid and staying in a holding pattern that goes on too long or whatever pathological stuff may come from the female side. I think there's some correlation between timidness and likely rejection so you just don't get many cases of medium-term friendships gone-romantic. I say medium term cause it's not suuuper uncommon that really long term friends just find themselve…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/17 03:06 PM
1

I think big variable is maturity. I can't really imagine a mentally healthy adult woman demanding friendship from anyone but situations like that are never free of -some- turbulence and it just usually takes a way less severe form of OP Title.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/17 02:54 PM
2

Definitely saw this happen once - I think it's a bigger deal than one might think if a guy has any sense of identity about being on the right side of womens' issues. If that's the case then that sort of thing is just a straight up attack on someone's identity.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/17 02:40 PM
1

I feel like 90% of women I've encountered are in the second group. Though one thing I've noticed is that the whole friendship thing matters way more in continuous social circles. I've lived in a huge city and in a small town and in the huge city group two was the default tacit understanding of the situation from both sides. The other groups seem to show up way more in the smaller town where there's less space to move on to. I imagine that's true in micro in places like high school or university.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/17 02:37 PM
3

Yeah it happens... I saw it happen once when a friend of mine turned some dude down and he didn't want to be friends, she talked a lot of shit about him not being able to handle friendships with women. It happened to me when for some reason I fell back in love with an ex, she was seeing someone and we had this heated talk when I was like 'I feel about you the way I do and I'm convinced we can't manage our way through it and have a friendship' She was adamant we could and didn't take kindly to it…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/17 12:44 AM
1

Hey thanks man!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/17 05:02 PM
1

I have no idea either and couldn't agree more.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/17 07:59 PM
1

oh man hope you succeed good luck
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/17 07:52 PM
1

I dunno man I'm not sure you can just handwave away culture as an influence - we're tribal to the bone. Echo chambers and cultures exist because shared agreement about things is one of the most core parts of our identities. I'd challenge how certain you can be that even 'not blaming society for my actions' isn't an imported meme that came from the values around you growing up.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/17 07:10 PM
1

Yeah I'm not sure how many women are like that. My experience is pretty coloured in that my wife -is definitely like that- I have no interest in being some traditional white collar household leader/piece of infrastructure. It's crazymaking trying to separate out all the RP bullshit when so much of it applies to apply to such a core relationship. I agree with the individuality thing but if you've got a Just Get It person in an important position in your life on your hands that strategy doesn't wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/17 06:57 PM
1

yeah "helpful, good, and possibly reap some rewards" are massively culturally informed by tweets like that if you're just some well intentioned kid on the internet who then grows up seeing what's in the video as expected.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/17 06:39 PM
1

I agree with the principle I was exactly the same way until I wasn't doing so well in life so I think there's some survivorship bias there. I don't know how many people want an authentic connection with genuine despair & pain but I haven't met any. It's definitely the way to go I think and stepping away from overly concrete ideas on what masculinity & doing well looks like is a pretty healthy thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/17 06:07 PM
1

I agree in general - but the issue I'm grappling with is what that's actually shaped like based on gender differences, ie: If women genuinely and inescabably want to feel led and/or taken care of and a man is genuinely insulted and/or socially lowered by the same sort of actions.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/17 03:47 PM
1

Yeah I can only wish we might eventually find ourselves a world where that's the biggest problem we have. It's hard to imagine a world where I'd prioritize it over a lot of things, but on the other hand if I take people's willingness to vote change in as a measure of the suffering behind it then as long as no human rights violations are occurring I couldn't begrudge it being voted in too hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 09:58 PM
1

Yeah that's why I tacked that on there - I am left wondering though whether it would successfully operate at the same level as common commercial friendliness (think servers, phone staff etc) does. No one's really under the illusion that person in front of you is really that excited to take your order but yet at the same time it does seem to assuage & smooth over some of our basic social subroutines. It doesn't get you all the way there in the same way a universal basic income isn't going to give…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 09:42 PM
3

Honestly don't see a big problem with this as long as its not conscripted and is proportional to the 'social infrastrucure' it provides society with. And if it actually solves the problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 09:21 PM
2

The problem with refraining from benevolent sexism is the fact that women see that action as woman-hating. Man that's exactly the sort of paradox I was trying to surface with the other post.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 09:09 PM
1

Reading this: https://imgur.com/gallery/6gRCnA Looks at history of revolutions not taking it too far: https://imgur.com/gallery/HoYp1cA
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 08:53 PM
2

Definitely not - I'm not just talking about physical strength here but capacity to do harm & agree that women's capacity for that gets less daylight that it deserves.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 08:41 PM
1

I think its due to the proportionality of the harm in question
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 08:25 PM
1

my only regret is that i only have but one upvote to give...
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 08:23 PM
1

I think it's bad to the extent that it undercuts merit and ability based decisions and opens the gate to our common dehumanising subroutines which leads to huge badness if you look not so far into our past.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 08:15 PM
1

absolutely agree with everything here Just to get one step more concrete form your answer, I think a huge part of gender differences live in the area of what they want rather than capability. Given that, and given that basically all nonphysical suffering is rooted in that same realm, what does it look like to even have some sort of objective standard for handling those differences? What does a "right to swing your fist ends at my chin" even look like for that super subjective territory?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 08:05 PM
1

Love the core thought - how do you think that applies if you don't limit that to physical strength? What does that look like to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 07:57 PM
1

My question wasn't scoped to just attraction though - I'm more interested in how gender differences affect how we ought to be treating each other & how we even decide that. We def have individual differences for sure but given that categories of people do exist and part of the difference is how they actually want to be treated what's the way you handle that?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 07:54 PM
1

Agree with the second part but I think this statement as a whole gets a little scary if you dial it back by about a hundred years
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 07:44 PM
1

ok let's define standard as 'treating someone the way you think they want to be treated' Taking gender into account how do do you handle the guesswork around this. For example offering help to someone or say offering to walk them to the bus stop and wait with them? I think there's a pretty strong difference between genders' reaction to this kind of thing. Specifically are you implying they're weak or are you accounting for their likely emotional profile?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 07:42 PM
2

Agree with the framework here. As someone who doesn't experience 'high n disgust' it's hard to viscerally understand why the double standard shouldn't be moved to "Why do studs get all the kudos when no one cares if I have a high n?" From a place of sluts being actively treated worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 07:33 PM
1

Yeah I definitely think (obv) that it's the reasonable position when you have the info that the mrm brings to light. It's pretty much the same reason why I'm not a feminist. There's a no true scotsman minefield here which I was deliberately trying to avoid by using the term 'flavour of rhetoric' rather than people or movement. Basically I don't like positions/rhetoric style that fires up people's victim status & tribal subroutines. Certainly NAMRAALT, but the 'men are the real victims' error doe…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 02:47 PM
2

Well in my case the answer was definitely undiagnosed depression & self esteem issues. When you think you're the problem and don't value your own opinion you'll be forever trapped in someone else's definition of your problems. I think there's a real pitfall in STEM where you can get detached from your own source of truth because of how solid a lot of the external info is. Like yeah you can go through the motions (even the social ones etc etc) but if you're not living in & comfortable with your o…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/17 10:41 PM
1

Yeah I'm trying to set up a life now of contracting with NGOs for some months and then just making music & touring between contracts. Should be pretty cool if I can execute it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/17 10:27 PM
3

not feminist but mostly disagree with the flavour of rhetoric that says men are the -real- victims of society and feminism. It just breeds victim identity. It's more like we're all victims of (and enforcers of) the legacy social/gender roles that were once necessary but probably aren't now because we've out-teched their value by orders of magnitude. It just takes time & freedom to figure out how to handle all this shit properly. That includes the stuff that men have had to face but it's not like…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/17 10:21 PM
5

right? When I tell old high school friends what I do for a living they look at me like lobsters are crawling out of my ears. The answer is "oh my god shoveling popcorn really sucks, if I -have- to do something to earn money i want it to at least be mildly interesting. Well, I make music with computers so maybe I can work with them for my day job." Add 10 yrs of depression masked as introversion and scripts about what growing up looks like and voila. Holy fuck that stuff looks great in the rearvi…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/17 09:36 PM
8

Pretty sure I'm BB at this point. I'm a bohemian ENFP recovering from 10 yrs of undiagnosed depression and 12 yrs of STEM career & culture osmosis. I was 26 and her 20. She was about a point or two up but we got married 6yrs into our relationship. No kids. I made way more than her as she was a student but she's from an extremely well off family so she defacto had more money available than I did. Sex was fine, she was a virgin so didn't know what she liked and I was in retrospect a little too int…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/17 07:02 PM
1

I think the key is whether the humour is a veiled complaint vs a real joke demonstrating actual self acceptance.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/17 11:34 PM
1

This is like saying everyone's actually christian and won't admit it because there's a bunch of overlap between codified law and the ten commandments. edit: actually do partly agree with first premise - there's no shortage of blue pill ad-hom on that front.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/17 11:10 PM
4

agree - its like saying punching a black dude makes you racist. Sure you could be racist and doing it could be motivated by that but all that lives in you & your intention not the action itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/17 07:27 PM
1

hah the real LPT is always in the comments
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/17 06:17 PM
1

Did I miss a meeting? I don't understand all this reading into what seems to me to be a pretty innocuous (of pretty shaky relevance to be fair) hypothetical question that's not making an assertion.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/17 04:46 PM
1

sorry my post came off way more aggressive than i intended - It's a genuinely good point and a useful distinction its just that logic and reason are only ever going to be garbage-in garbage-out, and are ultimately fed by instincts and emotions. The irony is particularly apparent in STEM where people get convinced they're right just because they've chained some conclusions together on top of a hunch.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/17 08:59 PM
2

HAHAHAHAH one of the first things I learned is how much religion is in tech. Technology is based on certainty but decisions aren't, not at the heart of it. I promise you the moment you say in the right meeting "we're going to do this in javascript" you'll find more religion than you ever wanted.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/17 07:50 PM
3

Here's a good stacie rant: https://vimeo.com/133805536 edit: To answer the question - I think the whole 'what's an alpha female' question kinda crosses too many gender-unique boundaries. Like "What's a female at the top of the male hierarchy like?" isn't really an answerable question. I think stacie is more meaningful as a placeholder for a woman who's super attractive and gets away with a lot because of it (and probably isn't super nice about it with other women) and is bitterly envied by less …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/17 02:39 AM
1

Familiar with Sapolsky's lectures on depression and stress mostly; background reading for me here is Pinker's Blank Slate and Better Angels of Our Nature, and a peppering of Ken Wilber. Will have a look at the others you mentioned. So your hypergamy paragraph - are you saying that the proximate stuff should just be taken at face value as a collection rather than extrapolated to 'hypergamy'?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 04:21 PM
1

Probably? I was deliberately loose with the language there because the detail doesn't matter so much. The point of the example was to highlight the different kinds of causes. I don't buy these distal evo psych causes I think that's pretty healthy? They really are guesses that aren't that verifiable but they can be a pretty good source of things to check for in the actual territory if you treat them that way instead of them being gospel.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 04:12 PM
1

Dude where in my post does it say that? How did you get the central character of my flair wrong it's like right below the title.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 04:03 PM
2

Both /u/writingtoc above and this are actually super helpful critiques of the post in terms of how to spur a conversation that gets somewhere - I actually feel like I learned something here from this so thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 03:59 PM
2

That's exactly what I was aiming for with this post!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 03:56 PM
1

It's just a phrase to keep a sense of entitlement to loyalty in check. No one's perfect at keeping all their shit in check. It can be taken too far like anything else but that doesn't make it bad advice for those who need to hear it. Another example would be employment loyalty. Everyone has some level of loyalty they intuitively expect/want from their employers/employees. There has to be some way of keeping it in perspective though so you don't end up hurting yourself and others. This is just th…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/17 06:25 PM
1

What are you trying to discern with this question? Edit: Just to answer the question - maybe? If it's the fact that she's 8 is what makes him hard then yes but otherwise no.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/17 05:56 PM
2

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/17 06:08 PM
1

I think it's something like If I want to go east and you want to go west, tradeoff is let's go east for a few years, then west a few years, where compromise is more like let's both go north or stay here.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/17 05:48 PM
1

E: Yes. H: Lots - it's a basic requirement of social interaction and the skill exists in everyone to different levels just like any other. Here's the thing - even if you look at people conversing in explicit/spoken language you'll still get a crapton of misunderstandings, cultural variation, unspoken assumptions & value judgements embedded in statements. Just look around this sub - it's a massive clusterfuck of all of the above. And that's with explicit language and no risk sexual violation. A m…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/17 05:41 PM
5

This rings completely bizarre to me - not saying its wrong at all but it's just so completely outside of my experience of the world that just reading it makes me feel like I'm in a David Lynch movie. Maybe we're in super different social spheres. I don't think I've ever heard, seen, or even heard of, any man ever complaining about a woman being overtly and genuinely sexually forward with them when they're in a romantic relationship. I've been in relationships of both styles and the "We should fu…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/17 05:11 PM
1

transhumanist erasure Can't decide if better as an album name or band name...
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/17 04:28 PM
1

A yeah I agree there within this community for sure - I'm more thinking of this problem as a vector for crazy rp shit to gain traction/legitimacy & project out through to the real world via the alt-right.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/17 05:34 PM
1

It's certainly valid to do so - but I think it borrowing terms runs the risk of confusing issues as much as helping define them. Thinking here of people confusing depression for clinical depression and the whole mess of free speech from the government vs free speech in a social/private environment (like with the google memo). Also I think a lot of is-ought bullshit comes from this flavour of confusion when terms are borrowed from evolution/biology.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/17 05:16 PM
1

Man that sounds like a pretty horrible place to live from. I kindof assume there's some sort of obstacle course (of whatever quality) of treatments/diagnosis to get to something as drastic as irreversible surgery. I wonder what the rates/records are like for people who went down different branches of that path. Assuming that something like that exists or will exist, there will be some sort of irreducible slip-through rate. I'd be really interested in knowing at any point knowing how close we are…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/17 04:38 PM
1

what made them think they were a woman inside in the first place? That's a -super- good question I'm genuinely interested in. Brain shit always ends up way more complex than we suspect. I mean though the effects of the gendered hormones seem pretty clear - what is it that's not lining up that clicks into place after hormone therapy? How often does the transition/hormone therapy produce lasting relief from that dysphoria? I've no idea - maybe /u/Princeso_Bubblegum does?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/17 03:22 PM
1

Maybe just your paraphrasing, but I think this probably isn't so different than a cis-man increasing testosterone and saying he feels more manly.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/17 02:53 PM
1

This is like saying "Late people complaining about bad directions/roadsigns just have slow cars/can't drive well." Maybe? Definitely in some cases? Definitely not in others?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/17 03:57 PM
2

thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/17 07:45 PM
5

"rhetoric of the pill people" totally stealing this for an album name
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/17 06:50 PM
1

Hypergamy is mostly about social status - read it as "higher than me and most men in a social hierarchy that's meaningful to me". That's not really what high value means from the male perspective. Nice cleavage is nice cleavage whether on your boss or a waitress. Edit: Talking about pure sexual attraction here.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/17 05:31 PM
4

I think it's a little more like... if you ask someone what they like in a waiter, they might say stuff like 'courteous, friendly, prompt etc etc'... The fact that they should take your order and bring your food might not actually come up because it feels so 'intuitively obvious' that it might escape overt discussion. Like there's a discrepancy between what feels like a given and what doesn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/17 05:36 PM
3

If you're thinking of taking up something you should already be checking out sessions in person for fit - deploy your bullshit meter there. If you find its a hippie-aikido shop then keep looking. Different places and arts treat the whole gender thing differently. Really. Trust your gut when you check them out. Odds are that exercises a guy in a dojo is handing you a few days a week being softened by a female presence are really unlikely to be your bottle neck. Way bigger variables are days of tr…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/17 08:03 PM
1

It's the mental tool thing. Like religious people saying "God is testing me". I think there probably isn't a God thats fucking with them & assigning letter grades but the sentiment does buttress people's determination & resilience regardless. It's specifically referring to points where you can really tank your attractiveness which deserve a bit of extra attention if you're talking about sex & relationships. Every one of those example questions is an opportunity for a guy to get butthurt even tho…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/17 08:01 AM
1

My understanding of morality is that its a module/capacity we have in us that imbues things we experience with feelings of rightness and wrongness that have a ring of absoluteness to them. How this module gets wired up depends on both culture & inherited traits . In some senses its arbitrary, and how truly objectively something is or isn't moral is really just a function of its "agreeosphere" footprint. I think the way it matters most is that it's a massive influencing factor on who should be ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/17 08:07 PM
1

Disingenuousness begets disingenuous. If you approach an interaction in a dehumanising, transactional way, expect the other party to engage in the same dynamic. Totally agree - I was more reacting to the phrasing of 'a date' when there was a mention of years but after above it looks like you were speaking more generically.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/17 04:36 PM
1

...You pay for the dates!" My wife did this to me for a long time, and she worked while we dated 2 years and for the first 3 years of our marriage. I feel like that dynamic could make just about anyone feel like Walking Wallet.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/17 04:09 PM
1

If it's an explanation that's purposefully dumbed down because of a low opinion of women then yes - mansplaining seems to be by definition is misogynistic There are plenty of other reasons for patronizing explanation, like general misanthropy, massive ego, or simply a bad guess at someone's level of experience with something. Calling something mansplaining (or not) is asserting the reason and plenty of people aren't going to guess right all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/17 07:57 PM
2

yes definitely - my 'diet' is about 50% each way. Was on video only for what must've been around 10 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/17 07:03 PM
1

36m - spent adolescence w/o internet porn, but also got laid all through high school in a boarding school ltr. I actually stumbled on a yes to this some time ago - I had completely switched to video for years and years, and stumbled on some site with pics and was surprised at just how much they still worked. I think it's something to do with the effort that goes into the eroticism of them maybe? Can't say whether it's due to being wired to pics only when younger. One thing I do know is that with…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/17 06:53 PM
1

Speaking as an ass/hips/leg man I'm gonna have to say no on this one
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/17 06:03 PM
2

relevant xkcd
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/16 09:11 AM
2

Yeah there are a lot of crossed wires there - especially when it comes to who needs what advice. If your compass is broken it can be real hard to separate the wheat from the chaff. It's something I notice in kendo a lot actually - we run into the problem a lot of beginners hitting the wrist too hard and its a common complaint heard in the pub. But there's a subset of people who hit waay too light for whatever reason and I always make sure when teaching them to take them aside and just say "You k…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/16 04:55 AM
10

Well for me personally it was: being raised in a household where masculinity was dismissed with an eyeroll was told that people value women more because they can give birth (5 year old me was like "Women better, ok got it.") plenty of smart woman, dumb male advertising growing up In general though there's a lot of media that can be interpreted in many ways. Ironically during my trip through the red pill I started seeing -it- everywhere in media too where I hadn't before. Like sure the main char …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/16 02:05 AM
4

Feel like there should be a razor to avoid attribution to gender differences what can be explained with universals. If you can't explain it first with "people suck in this way" or whatever, then start looking at gender, not the other way round. I think approaching life in this way would avoid a lot of needless firing up of in/out group ape subroutines and stereotyping.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/16 07:23 PM
2

I see her article as mostly virtue signaling and/or pr for herself, and their video made for honestly a pretty easy target. Also feels like there's something behind the scenes between the bands that would account for the disproportionate response? Their video was pretty hard to watch for me, like viscerally repulsive, watching these guys just giggling like teenagers asking for money clearly not taking it seriously. C'mon guys show me that you care enough not to just laugh as your careers circle …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/16 11:32 PM
1

For the slightly bored: http://www.qwghlm.co.uk/toys/dailymail/
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/16 06:10 PM
1

My best understanding of the current theory on this is we're just born with a moral sense - a piece of wetware we have like a sense of gravity or whatever. It just gets wired up to different things depending on culture, temperament etc, but is a genuine part of our reality as we experience it. A good paper by Steven Pinker on the subject: http://www.uky.edu/AS/PoliSci/Peffley/pdf/PINKER%2008%20The%20Moral%20Instinct%20-%20New%20York%20Times.pdf
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/16 06:37 AM
3

To be sure - not saying baldness is universally attractive but refuting that bald & sexy are mutually exclusive.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/16 10:39 PM
4

dude: walter white dwayne johnson patrick stewart bruce willis samuel l jackson ving rhames avery brooks tom hardy ron perlman jason statham edward norton more guys i cant remember Yeah they're all celebrities sure but being bald totally works for each of them and lots of us plebs too. You have to commit to it to make it work but its definitely no showstopper. Honestly it's actually one of the easiest ways you can add a little edge to your vibe.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/16 05:07 PM
2

Yeah def - was just un-critically thinking how to implement so it wouldn't disrupt flow of sex... All you need is a thumbprint enabled phone/smartwatch app connected to your government database entry containing all of your crypto-certified legal contracts/preferences! What could go wrong! :D
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/16 02:40 AM
3

I feel like there's a good black mirror episode in here somewhere...
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/16 01:59 AM
6

Something to think about untangling in all of this is the difference between proximal and distal causes. Take eating for example. We like salt, sugar, and oil (proximal cause). We're not holding some notion of trying to survive pre-agrarian pseudo famine (distal cause) that we could 'just admit to ourselves if we dug deep enough'. We just really really like the taste of those things. Of course we can guess at the causes for those flavours being wired so tightly to our dopamine circuit, or become…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/16 03:38 PM
1

Thats really interesting - I hadn't really considered that but it does make sense in the whole loner millhouse way. Just goes to show how open to interpretation this stuff can be.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/16 05:22 AM
1

For me the Thor/Loki thing demonstrates how much difference confidence makes. It's a film about Thor's inner struggle while being pitted agains Loki's unshakeable confidence. We got to see Loki's graceful swan but Thor's frantic paddling. He's pretty to be sure, but it's the wry grin and always getting the last laugh that makes the biggest difference here I think.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/16 12:08 AM
3

So my unicorn is: SMV-wise: physical parameters any doctor would call healthy/athletic rock/goth/counterculture style(this or this) BDSM switch Probably mid-20's Overtly expresses at least some sexuality Sex around once a day or every few days. RMV-wise: the 15 things but specific to me: Is a grown up former counterculture/bohemian sort of person who's found success/happiness being in a job that's putting something into the world they think should be there - as opposed to someone who's chasing s…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/16 06:35 PM
2

I think disagreeing with the opinion but still finding the sticking to of their guns attractive. "Totally disagree with their position on eugenics but hey at least they're not waffling on it to get laid!"
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/16 05:50 PM
5

I'm getting a trolling vibe from this comment - "I've tried everything from shaming, to guilt tripping, to buying her dresses 2 sizes too small." Seems like something a blue piller would say as part of a standup routine parodying the redpill. Seriously - read that in a Groucho Marx voice in your head with laugh track and all. If you're not a troll then yeah those are probably the most hurtful forms of feedback you could have given her and you've got a ways to go to undo that harm before even get…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/16 03:02 PM
0

yeah I'd feel a lot worse for him if he hadn't taken that attitude to my wife. I probably should have said ex-friend. :/
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/16 09:12 PM
4

Yeah totally agree. A lop-sided relationship like that is pretty unfair. I have a friend who was in basically a one sided poly relationship and it did horrible things to him inside. The whole thing was based on the whole "no one owns anyone" principle. She really did treat him as her main (I don't know the technical term) But man did he hurt on the inside from it and it came out in a weird mate poaching behaviour where he couldn't accept the validity of others' monogamy otherwise he'd have to fa…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/16 08:39 PM
2

Where's the tipping point between being confident and unafraid of competition, and being pragmatically anti-competitive in a free sexual market? This feels like nuclear no-win territory where you have a choice between showing dominance to go toe to toe with someone's instinct of free agency or demonstrating the courage to be a 'fighting champion'. Honestly this is where I get lost on the borders between really accepting the open sexual market place and polyamory.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/16 08:15 PM
1

The taboo of jealousy? edit: Not that they'd actually be ok with it but rather would likely be repressing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/16 07:58 PM
1

I think the difficulty is when speaking in generics. The word appropriate carries an aura of absoluteness that makes it hard to debate with without specifics when different perspectives & worldviews are in play. Personally I think the examples above are inappropriate because they're subverting a relationship which is the primary reason for the interaction taking place at all- speaker to audience or staff & customer or professional to professional or whatever. There are more ambiguous situations …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/16 07:56 PM
1

I think this is a problem of internal and external perspectives - Everyone wants to be loved for who they feel/think they are. I mean honestly that's probably a hard requirement for it to even feel like real love in the first place. We've evolved necessarily with instincts that, as a general rule, are consistent with external value. There comes to be a disconnect of course when it comes to individual differences and worldview, and also the whole "what if who I am inside just wants to masturbate …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/16 06:42 PM
2

I'd be pretty hard pressed to say it has no role. It's value depends on what you point it at, whether it's academics leading to achievement or social observations or wit or humour professional success or whatever and will definitely help get you to closer to 80 in whatever sphere of life. Some of those things will be more or less attractive to different women.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/16 01:35 AM
3

It's a sarcastic term cartoon-izing their intentions.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/16 07:37 PM
2

Can't put my finger on it exactly but I feel like there's is a good translation in here for men of how holding on too tight to things feels to a woman you're with; what the result looks like from the outside if you're insecure about your job or height or status or whatever else.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/16 06:18 PM
1

yeah definitely ran into that - for me now it serves kind of like an exit sign when I'm stuck in 'model world' without knowing it - sort of a mental inception totem.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/16 04:27 PM
1

So much this. Source: Doing this really fucked me up as a person. Counseling was the answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/16 03:19 PM
1

What we're being talking about here is a meaningful difference in intention between a threat and genuinely exercising freedom to leave a relationship due to not getting what you want out of it. Yeah they're both technically coercion but the dictionary definition applies to such a trivially wide range of human interaction, both benign and malignant, that it becomes meaningless to use. Just to be clear the root sentiment I'm hearing from you is 'Women shouldn't have to make sexual choices based on…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/16 03:31 AM
1

The difference here is that you own the watch.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/16 02:25 AM
1

There's a really good framework for some of this in Ken Wilbers' work - dealing with the internal and external perspectives. http://rationalspirituality.com/articles/Ken_Wilber_4_Qudrants.htm You can totally be right in front of a real live person and your core/real experience can all the while be pointed at the concepts and ideas they trigger. In that sense your perspective is still 'external' - you're looking at some construct inside your head. Your core experience isn't wired directly to your…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/16 11:48 PM
6

Depends on empathy for who & why. We are pretty much all (outliers aside) born with a sense of empathy and a sense of morality, both of which end up being sort of 'wired up' to different behaviours & ideas. Empathy can be switched on & off pretty easily with flags, rhetoric, being wronged, seeing someone as a threat. We all have 'empathy' in varying amounts but its more of an inborn mechanism that gets wired up to things based on our perspective and worldview. A more informative question might b…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/16 11:16 PM
5

It's a running joke in Archer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_yuq7-gk1Y
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/16 10:54 PM
2

tits are just an example - my point is that whatever thing you you find hot about a girl has nothing to do with any insecurity of yours. op is arguing the double standard: man is insecure about height is labeled insecure woman likes height and is not labeled insecure just a case of some wires being crossed and comparing the wrong things
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/16 10:34 PM
1

Yeah that's unfortunate - I feel like RP can have a real negative effect here, where a guy's fine, and suddenly given a crapton of stuff he could be insecure about that he never would have been before. This is of course because of the underlying insecurity but it's easy to conflate that with a load of content (like height) and never solve the root cause. This is the main reason why I think therapy/counseling is a good way to go first before/along with red pill ideas - its real easy to get lost i…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/16 09:48 PM
9

Apples to oranges. A woman having a preference for tall men has no more to do with her insecurity than your preference for tits does yours. I think the double standard is 'women can feel insecure about the SMP but men can't' but that's not what's being argued. Jury's out on whether its fair but I don't think we can change it until some sort of genetic engineering singularity.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/16 09:30 PM
2

I think feminism is most concerned with protecting/maximizing female sexual choice (as experienced by women), ideally setting up a situation where a woman never gives sex if she doesn't want to. A fantastical ideal of this being something like Inara from firefly, always having high value suitors lined up and having her pick of them. Honestly I think the core intention there is a Pretty Good Thing™ Where things get dissonant is when their sense of freedom being impinged by the real world market l…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/16 09:17 PM
2

I think what you're talking about is a symptom of why some people end up in the red pill, and is something people continue doing once they're there. I'm an artsy sensitive poetic INFP male who ended up in STEM in my early 20s to pay the bills and made a career of it. What I experienced over the course of my career was a kind of crushing of all that intuitive raw experience, and my experience being rooted in a world of concrete systems constructs as if living in some sort of matrix simulation in …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/16 08:05 PM
1

Here's where I get lost with the whole power exchange thing. Complete power exchange seems at odds with sensible safety. Some of the greatest power anyone can have is the ability to say no - ie: safewords and other boilerplate. I don't understand how someone can experience 'complete and utter submission and helplessness' while holding that power - unless all the power exchange stuff in BDSM exists within a suspension of disbelief layered on top of that? If so it seems way more sane, but a bit se…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/16 08:49 PM
1

Breaking into the local university football stadium and having sex on the 50yd line was probably the most romantic thing I've ever experienced.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/16 05:19 PM
2

I think it just means that discernible insincerity is a massive people repellant. I think a generous red pill translation of what well meaning people are trying to say with it might be: "Don't try to cheat the SMP, cultivate legit value instead and have the courage to face the results honestly." I think the whole bogeyman-ness comes from an aggressive bitter-beta interpretation: "don't change anything, shut the fuck up and stay in your hole" or comes maybe from aggressive blue pillers who don't …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/15 06:37 PM
4

only anecdotal but in most of the times & places I've ever seen catcalling it's seemed to be more about males showing off their libido & daring to other males (and themselves?) and actually has little to do with actually pursuing a woman at all. from an rp perspective I think it might be some primitive attempt of showing off a lack of approach anxiety. Just randomly making people uncomfortable for the sake of your own ego is just a dick thing to do and ppl shouldn't do it. As an individual you'r…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/15 06:15 PM
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