It’s unfair and misogynistic to pay women $.77 for every dollar a male worker is paid! Isn’t that what we’re told endlessly by our mass media and our politicians who are endlessly fighting the oppression of Patriarchal society and it’s malevolent scheme to keep women down? The wage gap is one of the MOST important issues that we as a country face today!
Well, I’m here to offer the the solution to this problem!
Not only should women be paid the same as men, companies should pay women MORE than their male counterparts! In this way, companies can accomplish two things at once:
1) By attaining the reputation for paying women more, a company will be able to attract and hire enough female employees to satisfy the Federal Government’s unofficial quota system, which can actually audit your employment records and decide that a company has been discriminatory and fine them heavily. By paying women MORE than their male colleagues, they can avoid running afoul of our great Government as it protects our freedom and liberty!
2) By paying women MORE than their male counterparts, companies will then be able to treat all of their employees fairly and equally! If a female employ screws up or engages in unethical or bad employee behavior, the company will then be able to fire her without fear of being sued for discrimination…after all, she was being paid more than her male counterparts, so OBVIOUSLY this company does not discriminate against women!
Don’t you see, all you old, white, rich guys that run the companies of this great nation? By paying women employees MORE than the male employees, you will then be able to have an equal workplace!
Ahhh…but you see, I must confess: I am not the first to come up with this brilliant idea. Apparently some high tech computer companies have already figured this out!
Women in Tech Make More Money and Land Better Jobs
Well how about that…
…equality at last!
Now that’s a great article, noting a watershed moment in the history of our Brave New World Order — but unfortunately, the comment section of that article has been invaded by a host of misogynist trolls!
Look at the comments of one guy going by the name of Longterm Consequences:
As an employer, it is much cheaper to give females a 3% salary premium, on average, than to pay idiot lawyers to explain why a woman fired on the merits was merely paid at parity with men, or heaven forbid, lower than some of the men.
But let’s be honest humans.
Can anyone tell me the names of any of the killer software apps ever conceived of and made by a woman?
It might be that vision thing again.
Just might.
Some women do have it for tech, but it seems to be extremely rare.
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Just to be clear, my point is that it seems only safe to fire a woman if she was being paid more than her male peers.
So think of it this way: if you want to be able to fire a woman when you find out she isn’t good, you best have paid her a salary premium all along the way.
Get it?
Think of it as paying firing insurance on her!
If you pay the premium, you can fire her. If you don’t, you can’t fire her because some scammy lawyer will loot your company for the crime of firing a WOMAN.
And people wonder why China is eating America’s lunch.
Why is that guy so…so…hateful? He must have a tiny penis and cannot get laid!
Here’s another comment by a pathetic creep, who no doubt can’t get a date with a big, beautiful, empowered and independent single mother! He’s most likely some loser still living in his mommy’s basement, masturbating to porn!
Hire a woman, hire a lawsuit.
This is why businesses outsource jobs to Asia. Don’t get mad at the Indian workers, just because they happen to live in a country where feminists can file bogus lawsuits on businesses that make it expensive to operate in America.
Feminism causes outsourcing. Remember that.
Alright America…it looks like we still have a looooooonnnnng way to go when it comes to achieving equality between the genders! I can’t believe there are still neanderthals who still think this way! Wake up you disgusting creeps! This is the 21st century!
So wake up Corporate America! Start paying women MORE than men, and we can have a much more fair and equal world for our daughters to grow up in!
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Special thanks to the Man Women & Myth – Truth, Lies and the War on Men website for the image used for this article.
