Are You A Slob?

Yesterday I was reading RooshV’s recent post “18 Reasons Guys Don’t Get Laid” and one of those reason has been something on my mind lately, what I consider to be a fundament of what some call Inner Game-not looking like a slob.

In Manosphere circles, of which I consider the Game/PUA portion to be a part of, there’s a great deal made of how Women in our time have let themselves go-you don’t need me to recount the ways. Virtually every week, if not more frequently, somebody out in the Manosphere will bemoan the Dowdying of Feminine America in one way or another, usually in the most unflattering of terms. While there is certainly something to be said here, I’ve always found the exercise itself to be the very kinds of feminine behavior (bitching, whining and moaning) that so many Men one, claim to despise, and two, are supposed to be above; afterall, to be a Man is to take the bull by the horns and make things happen, NOT sit on the sidelines and bleat on and on about shit nobody, least of all YOU, can do a darned thing about.

Right?

So, in light of the aforementioned, and in solidarity with Roosh (somebody I’ll definitely be reading more of in the coming weeks), I thought to dedicate the first of what I hope will be many posts focused on helping guys up their Game for real.

So let’s begin. Like Roosh said, are you a fright to see naked? Don’t get me wrong here-no one’s saying you gots to have six pack abs and 0% body fat-but looking like the Michelin Man, like you’re about to ape Octomom any minute, hell to the naw, that does NOT make a Woman moist. The Obsidian Axiom #10 is very clear on this point: when you’re fully clothed, take a look down-if you cannot see your belt buckle, you could stand to lose a couple.

And you don’t need to join a gym to do it-Russell Crowe got in shape for his role in The Gladiator by doing farm work. In fact, and I say this as a lifelong Blue Collar Guy, it was rare to see many Men having pot bellies, double chins and the like. Simply put, the more active you are, the more likely you’ll be in shape. Make it a point to move your ass early and often. Walk-alot.

Next, let’s consider your grooming. While they’re some posers and haters out there, I proudly proclaim the Axe line of Men’s grooming products to be a Godsend to Humanity, because as a Man I know for a fact that A LOT OF GUYS STINK. To me, Axe is akin to the Garanimal clothing line they had for kids way back in the day, where you matched things up according to the animal you saw on the clothing. Axe makes it really simple for a guy to wash his ass, AND the best part? It didn’t cost an arm and a leg to d it either. Hey, if you can afford to go all out on toiletries and cologne, do your thing bro, but most guys, especially the slobs, either can’t or don’t yet see the value in such an exercise. Axe is a great starting point, and believe me when I tell you, the Ladies WILL thank you for it.

Next-the haircut. Now admittedly, we Brothas are a bit tighter in this regard, so I’m afraid this has to be aimed abit more at our Brothers from Another Mother, so to speak-unless you’re a certain type of personality, loose the Steven Seagal ponytail, that’s so 90s. Same deal for the combover-if you’re losing your hair, SHAVE IT ALL OFF. Women like neatness in a Man, and having a nicely clan shaven head can and will turn many a Woman on, even, especially, those who don’t normally go in for that sort of thing. Same deal w/the grungey stubble thing happening that I see a lot of Hipster White Guys do-it’s not appealing and makes you look dirty. Get a good shaver and shave.

Staying in shape will reflect well on your face because it will emphasize your jawline; this will work very well if you aim to rock a beard or goatee, which has always been seen as an “Alpha Male” look. The trick is to keep it groomed nicely, but if done well, Women will most definitely like it.

Next, clothes, and this goes for both White and Black guys, who tend to be on the extremes of the spectrum here. White guys tend to wear their clothes too tight; lots of Brothas, too darned loose/big. There needs to be a kind of meeting of the minds here. White guys-WEAR A BELT WITH YOUR PANTS. That’s what the belt loops are for, and Women LOVE a Man who accessorizes well. That means, hats, gloves, scarves, belts, etc. You don’t have to go into hock for this sort of thing, just take a Sunday afternoon at Target or H&M and look around and try out stuff. You’ll be surprised what you find.

Brothas-PULL YOUR PANTS UP. No one is interested in looking at your boxer-encased butt or worse, your impersonation of Joe The Plumber Asscrack. And those long as White Tees? Oh my. Yo, Dickies are a line of clothing FOR WORK, so if you’re gonna wear em, actually have ajob to go with it, OK? And I don’t know where the idea of aping Charlie Brown’s baseball cap thing came from, but it looks absolutely ridiculous, and it needs to stop, pronto.

Many Brothas like to wear their hair long, like in braids or locs-that’s cool, but KEEP IT UP. Nothing looks worse that a Thug Nigga who really does look like a Thug. One of the great things about having styles like that is that you can always get a Sista who’ll only be too happy to do your hair for you. So hop to.

In a nutshell fellas, instead of complaining about how Women today look, how about taking a good looking in the mirror and objectively assessing how YOU look? Take some care about your appearance. You don’t have to be the next Brad Pitt or Denzel Washington, but you can look a lot better than you currently do-and while its true that Men are more visually driven than Women, keep in mind they ain’t Helen Keller, either. Women have always liked a well dressed, fit Man, and always will. Follow these simple rules and watch your Game takeoff.

Now adjourn your grimey asses.
The Obsidian