One of the few defenses a male in a relationship has under the current domestic abuse laws is to leave.

RicoX9 · 2009-01-16T16:36:03+00:00

If you have children and leave, you have "abandoned" your children. You lose automatically. The court will award full custody to the mother and slap you with child support and probably alimony. In our current environment, there is no way to win if a woman decides she's done with you.

theseusastro · 2009-01-16T22:45:34+00:00

Sorry, chick here -- I don't understand this article. Is this about how you should leave if you are the victim of domestic abuse? Or is this about what you should do if your domestic partner is filing spurious domestic abuse charges?

It seems like rule one in the latter scenario is "talk to a lawyer." In the former scenario, yeah, leaving is of course the best option -- but if it were that easy, that's what female domestic abuse victims would do, too.

Mooshiga · 2009-01-16T23:36:32+00:00

This article has some good points, but I hate generalizations about how The Court or Victim Services will not help you. Courts and victims services offices are different everywhere, and general statements like this deter people from seeking help from the system. Victims Services can be an excellent place to start, and are a great resource to people who cannot afford a lawyer. They have no legal right to stop you from filing anything. If you sense they are hostile rather than helpful, just walk away.

Also, court battles over restraining orders are difficult. But generalizations about how the court will not listen only help abusers. Abusers are also telling victims that the courts will not listen. Male victims of abuse are told the court will not believe them, that the court will find them guilty of abuse instead, and this stops them from coming forward. Moving out and running away are good moves, but sometimes state protection is necessary, and that's why restraining orders exist. In summary, I wish the article went lighter on the "the system will get you!" and heavier on the "consult a lawyer."

2009-01-16T13:41:58+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	One of the few defenses a male in a relationship has under the current domestic abuse laws is to leave.
Author	kanuk876
Upvotes	16
Comments	17
Date	January 16, 2009 9:28 AM UTC (17 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/7q5ro/one_of_the_few_defenses_a_male_in_a_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/one-of-the-few-defenses-a-male-in-a-relationship.1055464 https://theredarchive.com/post/1055464

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