(From A Liberal) A Tipping Point: We've Finally Noticed Boys' Struggles

mhandanna · 2020-06-05T21:08:32+00:00

An article about boys (and men) and how we need to advocate for them. It is from a liberal persepctive. The left really need to step up and advocate for mens right. Right now there are many advocates for men and boys, and they are nearly all from the right. I was actually really suprised to see how many prominent peple actually hold very MRA views (In politics, media, public figures) - men and women but they are nearly all conservative. I was actually suprised how MRA they were, especially the women, who were very pro MRA type things (and perfelctly understood issues such as feminsm gone mad, toxic masculinty being a front used by feminism to demonise men, boy crisis in school, metoo hsteria) which is good, but at the same time I fear that as some of them are older, that generation mindest will die off.

"Five years ago I wrote that I couldn’t “see myself joining people with whom I disagree sharply on almost all other social issues, so I can't see somehow becoming a conservative to help my sons, my grandsons, and young males across the country. But I can't stand feeling so alone either; so all I can do is urge my fellow liberals to make this part of their agenda too. Maybe boys haven't been the victims of laws and obvious -isms, but, as a group, they have been the victims of, at very least, neglect, and they need help from across the political spectrum.”

mhandanna · 2020-06-05T21:19:53+00:00

A good quote in the comments (I googled the name, I think her son commited suicide and as she said she works in child trauma)

I'm appalled, as a licensed mental health counselor, child trauma specialist and mother of a son by your statement, "Maybe boys haven't been the victims of laws and obvious -isms, but, as a group, they have been the victims of, at very least, neglect, and they need help from across the political spectrum.” Boys suffer sexism and legalized abuse everyday with no political outcry:

It is legal for boys to be held down, their penises forcibly handled and their foreskin completely flayed from their glans, causing severe physical suffering and emotional distress, for no medical purpose.

Although empirical studies have shown that boys make up more than half of sexual assault victims and victims of dating violence, they are the neglected and overlooked victims of abuse, especially abuse by girls and women- Abuse of boys is ignored or minimized.

Boys are the primary victims of all forms of child abuse, with mothers being their primary abusers. This fact is ignored by the mental health field, legislators and political groups.

Boys are the primary victims of suicide, but this fact is often minimized and buried.5.At 18, boys are forced to register for the military, regardless of their beliefs about violence and war.

It is also well known that most boys are kinesthetic learners and need to move in order to learn, yet schools refuse to accommodate the needs of children, especially boys. Instead, there is an epidemic of pathologizing boyhood and chemically controlling boys.

Boys are stereotyped as dangerous predators and in the fields of mental health and juvenile justice, they are not treated with the same compassion, empathy and understanding as girls.

All over our culture, in the media and in day-to-day society, boys get the message that they are stupid, bad, dangerous and not allowed to be nurtured, comforted, sad, championed, loved, or cared about.

If you don't believe these and the many other abuses of boys to be evidence of "victims of laws and obvious -isms", then perhaps you should liberate yourself from political sides and take an honest look at the suffering of our boys.

And the reply by the amazing Karen Straughan:

Hi Laurie, I've enjoyed some of your vlogs on YouTube, and can't thank you enough for the passion and compassion you've demonstrated regarding these issues.

I find it strange that someone as sensible and centrist (on gender issues, at least) as Christina Hoff Sommers could be described as "polarizing"--though I suppose when all gender issues are considered to lie under the rubric of a group that is actually, genuinely polarizing, being a centrist might seem "extreme".

I have been very outspoken about genital mutilation, and it seems to me that the feminist take on my advocacy is that by opposing male genital mutilation, I am somehow asserting that FGM isn't horrific or wrong. When I say that you can find "studies" coming out of Yemen and other countries where FGM is practiced that "prove" FGM has all the same benefits as the studies we have used to justify MGM, and that these cultures defend the practice using the exact same bogus reasoning as we do to defend MGM in the West, I get accused by feminists of promoting FGM!

It's astounding that this bizarre reaction to someone saying "both are wrong, there is no excuse for either" is not seen as polarizing, or zero sum thinking. It's astounding to me that my centrist and equalist position on it is considered "extreme" by the ideological group that has a stranglehold on gender issues.

And it's astounding to me how so few on the left, at least in positions of power, are willing to take some responsibility for correcting a situation they helped create through their blind support and enabling of "equality advocates" who have, for the most part, never promoted actual equality.

The very same historical prejudices regarding women--that they are kind, nurturing, and have good intentions--bamboozled the left into swallowing their gigantic gendered threat narrative whole, and attempts on the part of the right to correct this have been too regressive and sloppy to do any good. People like Hoff Sommers are too easily painted with the same brush as Limbaugh--"don't listen, they're dangerous, anyone who speaks against the excesses of feminism wants women back in the kitchen!"

This is, perhaps, the first time in global history where society is willing to tolerate pervasive public and even institutionalized speech about *their own men* that is disturbingly similar to the way Nazis talked about Jewish men in the 1930s, or the way Hutus talked about Tustsi men, or the way the KKK talked about black men. That this author wants to help boys is admirable. That he is somehow oblivious to the parallels between what feminism says, and has said for 150 years, about all men, and what the KKK historically said about black men, is disappointing.

Anyway, I've been rambling, but again, I was delighted to find you here, valiantly continuing to push that boulder up the hillside, and I couldn't help but respond to your comment with a heartfelt thank you for all you do, and some commiseration from a fellow soldier.

adlerchen · 2020-06-06T07:44:01+00:00

This is from 5 years ago. If anything, I would say the men's movement has only made ground with conservatives. Liberals still don't want to listen. They're quadrupling down on female CEOs as the highest priority gender issue of our age, not the boy crisis and family formation and stability. It will be many years before there will be a left wing Tucker Carlson. The left still is infected with misandry and thinks the "future is female" and "males are privileged." They interpret, cynically or sincerely, any discussion of men's issues as a secret attempt to "oppress" women. Their worldview is zero sum, and they have their side to win total victory for. They won't continuance any reflections on how men's and women's lives and well being are intrinsically interconnected with each other.

SonnBaz · 2020-06-06T10:46:01+00:00

If this is true then it's a great victory for us

Title	(From A Liberal) A Tipping Point: We've Finally Noticed Boys' Struggles
Author	mhandanna
Upvotes	23
Comments	5
Date	June 5, 2020 9:06 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/gxd3df/from_a_liberal_a_tipping_point_weve_finally/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/from-a-liberal-a-tipping-point-weve-finally.1063347 https://theredarchive.com/post/1063347

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