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[–]NecessaryCook2 points [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link
Is there an element here where your mom's mistreatment has extended to a dislike of ALL women? You sound very self-aware, have you tried therapy?
[–]itcudMALE POSTER[S] 2 points3 points4 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]NecessaryCook2 points [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
Tbh I feel like this is going to take tremendous self-work because childhood trauma and narcissistic parenting has such lasting effects, but you can definitely make great progress. You should read psychology books about narcissistic parents, emotionally abusive people, manipulative people, and also philosophy books. I think once you see the scientific explanations as to why you feel the way you do, you’ll get some relief. There is solidarity knowing you’re not alone and knowing it’s not your fault that your mom was so cold and mean. You can definitely get through it and start seeking out more positive examples of femininity. Are there any women you admire? In science perhaps? Read biographies about women. Watch movies of their stories. Try to foster empathy for them. Many women have been in a similar situation where their parents were also not the best. Develop that kind of perspective. Everyone’s human and not everyone is going to be like your mom.
It makes perfect sense you feel broken, who wouldn’t be with all that trauma? But at a certain point you have to make a decision not to let that define you and to be the architect of your own life from now on. I believe it would be empowering for you to read in depth about how your current situation is a result of bad parenting. Feel all the feelings. And then, delve into philosophy or find deeper meaning in life and begin thinking about how to move forward once you make peace with your past. Think of it as two options, you’re either going to let that shit mess up the rest of your life, or pick a date to get your shit together and start living your best life again.
Check out r/raisedbynarcissists for a community of those like you, might be a good thing to ask them too.
[–]itcudMALE POSTER[S] 2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]mothboyi 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link