Crosspost "TIFU when I fell in love with my wife" from /r/tifu:

Random throwaway account.

Last year my best friend (28f) and I (29m) got married. Not due to love, but because we made a pact at the beginning of our 20s, that if we approached the age of 30, and neither of us had found the love of our lives, that we would marry each other. It felt like a joke at the time because the two of us were 100% convinced we would have our soulmates by now. Like everyone else in our social circle.

Watching all of our friends getting married and have kids eventually made us go "sooo about that pact...". Cue the wedding. It was surprisingly easy to sell our random relationship to the people in our lives because most of them assumed we were dating anyway. I mean, how could a single guy and a single girl JUST be good friends? It's unthinkable!

The first few months of married life were awkward but fun. Awkward in a sense that we were still figuring out the rules of our relationship, especially in regards to sex. Are we fucking, are we not fucking, and if we are, do we ever call it "making love", is love even allowed? And so it went on and on. But like I said, it was fun. We enjoyed the process. Even the failures. Such as intimacy.

The sex didn't work for her. She struggled to unsee me as her long time friend whenever we attempted to sleep together. Like, she would literally cover her face during sex because of how awkward it was for her to look at me while I'm inside of her. Not gonna lie, it stung a bit. But we were still able to laugh it off. We agreed to stop having sex with each other and decided it was best to sleep with other people.

Fast forward to 2022. Valentine's Day is approaching. My first Valentine's Day as a married man. A married man who's come to realize he has fallen deeply in love with his best friend / now wife. A wife who had sex with 37 people in the first year of our marriage. Two of those people are mutual friends. Five of them are regular hookups. One of those regulars still needs to return my Ghost of Tsushima video game, which he borrowed after sleeping with my wife on my fucking birthday.

I've had sex with one other person since our marriage. One time only. Sleeping with random people is not really for me, wife or no wife, especially not when I have feelings for someone specific. I'm not comparing body counts to shame my wife. She's done nothing we didn't agree to beforehand. That being said, I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. I can tell by the way my wife looks at me that I'm not her Romeo. I'm the close friend she can share the details of her sex life with, among other things. If I decide to express my feelings now, I feel like nothing good will happen.

So, on Valentine's Day, I'll play my part and get my wife a cute card and some flowers before I leave her to be with guy #38. She showed me his Instagram. He's a surfer with a fucking shark bite scar on his body. I hope that scar still hurts (sorry I'm being mean).

Anyway, that's the end. If anyone ends up reading this post and leaves a comment, please help me laugh about this. I'm good at laughing whenever I'm unhappy, but I'm gonna needs some help with this one.

TL:DR Married my best friend based on a pact. Fell in love with her. Doubt she feels the same. Now I'm stuck as the side character in my wife's diary of a young woman.

Posted by HugTheHusband | 12 February 2022 | Link