In my late teens and early 20s I was a massive pickme. I didn't understand the true nature of men and dating. I often tried to recreate that intense romance with LVM that media, movies, books and society brainwashed me to think that was the be all and end all of what I needed in my life. I used to cry, beg, and explain till I was blue in the face to LVM that the right thing to do was to treat me with humanity and empathy 🤡 I projected my own empathy and kindness onto them.
Begging and pleading and crying made them respect me less, they didn't listen or care. One of the biggest FDS lessons I learnt is that men respond to actions, not reasoning, not emotions, and definitely not you over-communicating. You should not threaten them with leaving either. Leaving a man should be calculated and well planned and thought out. This way you're prepared for any response. Don't go back to them either. Men have less respect and more contempt for women who go back to them.
When I've cried and begged to be treated with basic human decency in my pickme days they just stared blank face at my tears or berated me. When I left with no emotion, they cried, pleaded begged and started jumping hoops to give me what I wanted.
You can cry to your trusted friends, family, therapist. But don't cry and plead with LVM. You're allowed to feel hurt. Just don't beg. If you're sensitive and cry during a breakup that's fine too. Just be firm in your stance on the breakup, don't explain or beg. You can cry those silent tears while you pack up and leave.
