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Focus on the Family’s Message to Divorced Dads:

Banake

May 20, 2022
16 upvotes
/r/MensRights
https://ncfm.org/2012/07/news/discrimination-news/discrimination-against-men-news/focus-on-the-familys-message-to-divorced-dads/
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Post Information
Title Focus on the Family’s Message to Divorced Dads:
Author

Banake

Upvotes 16
Comments 5
Date May 20, 2022 11:39 AM UTC
(4 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/utsxh1/focus_on_the_familys_message_to_divorced_dads/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/focus-on-the-familys-message-to-divorced-dads.1119229
https://theredarchive.com/post/1119229
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Comments

[–]YetAnotherCommenter 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Unsurprisingly. Tradcons like FotF will never hold women accountable. They'll always have some Christian "forgiveness" waiting for women.

Not only that, but it makes sense that someone like James Dobson - who advocates for childbeating - would think fathers are fungible and easily replaced. After all, in Dobson's world, fathers are meant to be distant and critical authority figures whom are near-impossible to please and spend almost all their time at work (and when home are mostly dispensing beatings).

[–]SudetenNachkomme 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

lol makes perfect sense. I was in ministry while my NPD now ex-wife was sabotaging everything; my church had me step down and attend a FOTF marriage seminar. Spoiler alert: it did nothing to save my marriage. And of our group mine wasn’t the only one to fall apart after either.

[–]YetAnotherCommenter 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

my church had me step down and attend a FOTF marriage seminar. Spoiler alert: it did nothing to save my marriage.

Let me guess... they basically said it was 100% your job to fix the marriage and put absolutely zero onus on her?

This is why the infantilization of women (be it the tradcon type or the feminist type) needs to end.

[–]SudetenNachkomme 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Ironically no; the messaging they gave us was strongly egalitarian (even though she was the clear abuser in the marriage, and they had even told me that privately). But they did promise to “walk alongside us” as we worked on our marriage, and then basically ignored us for several months until we left. Still stings; I regarded a lot of those pastors as friends, and had they not expressed that promise (this was from the Lead Pastor too), I’d have never held that expectation of them.

Now my ministry is gone, and I can’t go back. Not exactly high demand for a divorced pastor in my area. And I don’t believe I’m qualified anymore either. Feels like a giant rug pull. I had dreams of going on the international mission field and taking the gospel to the nations, my NPD ex-wife mirrored those same dreams to me to get me to marry her. Then the mask came off and she did everything she could to keep that from happening.

Still love the Lord, but man - trust people again after that, even in the church? Not until I verify. Never taking someone at face value again.

(Lol best part was they had me pursue a seminary degree that I can’t finish and have no use for now, and incur an extra $25K in student debt. FML)

[–]B1G_Fan 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Denominational churches are living on borrowed time because they are unwilling to say “no” to the unreasonable demands of millions of females

Interdenominational organizations such as FotF are obviously living on even less time

Nondenominational churches (and extended families) are the way of the future since you only have to say no to the unreasonable demands of dozens of women

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