For Anyone Who Hasnt seen the Context of the 'Revenge Porn' Quote from the Aziz Ansari Story, Here it Is. Its Very Accurate

Ultramegasaurus · 2018-01-23T13:16:16+00:00

Women are encouraged to feel entitled to relationships after they have sex with men. Society still says that sex is something women "give" and men have to pay for in one way or another. Thus, a man who does not hand out commitment after sex is often seen as evil.

oursland · 2018-01-23T15:04:38+00:00

So many good tid bits in this article. As someone who grew up in the 80s (albeit a male), I can totally relate:

by the time you reach 50, intimate accounts of commonplace sexual events of the young seem like science fiction: You understand the vocabulary and the sentence structure, but all of the events take place in outer space. You’re just too old.

Apparently there is a whole country full of young women who don’t know how to call a cab, and who have spent a lot of time picking out pretty outfits for dates they hoped would be nights to remember.

Putting the encounter in the context of how it would be viewed in the past, perhaps those "prudes" with "crusty old morals" were onto something:

When she saw Ansari at the party, she was excited by his celebrity—“Grace said it was surreal to be meeting up with Ansari, a successful comedian and major celebrity”—which the magazines would have told us was shallow; he brushed her off, but she kept after him, which they would have called desperate; doing so meant ignoring her actual date of the evening, which they would have called cruel. Agreeing to meet at his apartment—instead of expecting him to come to her place to pick her up—they would have called unwise; ditto drinking with him alone. Drinking, we were told, could lead to a girl’s getting “carried away,” which was the way female sexual desire was always characterized in these things—as in, “She got carried away the night of the prom.” As for what happened sexually, the writers would have blamed her completely: What was she thinking, getting drunk with an older man she hardly knew, after revealing her eagerness to get close to him?

Those middle-aged women writing the advice columns of yesteryear had sage advice gained through experience. As my grandmother used to say...."nothing is open after midnight except legs."

The feminist writer and speaker Jessica Valenti tweeted, “A lot of men will read that post about Aziz Ansari and see an everyday, reasonable sexual interaction. But part of what women are saying right now is that what the culture considers ‘normal’ sexual encounters are not working for us, and oftentimes harmful.”

Well, then don't put yourself in that situation. Have some "agency." Take responsibility. If you don't wan't a meaningless hookup--DONT HAVE ONE. But in the 90s-00s, the likes of Valenti would have described meaningless hookups as "empowering."

2018-01-23T22:01:45+00:00

Its almost as if they cannot see the double standard of asserting that it is "empowering" and part of "equality" for women to have sexual desires and agency, but that all male sexuality is "problematic" and "toxic."

2018-01-23T17:26:42+00:00

Yeah, that's pretty much the story of womanhood - although not every woman believe in hating men because they want the alphas and almost always get disappointed time and again.

For Anyone Who Hasnt seen the Context of the 'Revenge Porn' Quote from the Aziz Ansari Story, Here it Is. Its Very Accurate

Comments

#hisbodyhischoice!

Title	For Anyone Who Hasnt seen the Context of the 'Revenge Porn' Quote from the Aziz Ansari Story, Here it Is. Its Very Accurate
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	48
Comments	10
Date	January 23, 2018 12:05 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/7sdxsj/for_anyone_who_hasnt_seen_the_context_of_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/for-anyone-who-hasnt-seen-the-context-of-the.1179923 https://theredarchive.com/post/1179923