How to find the right therapist for circumcision grief?

AllYourBaseboard · 2019-12-14T15:58:21+00:00

Hi. I'm really sorry you're feeling that way. I asked this question on another sub a while ago. Maybe you can find some useful advice there:

https://np.reddit.com/r/askatherapist/comments/bv8c1u/how_to_raise_topic_of_circumcision_in_therapy/

I can't think of any good "screener" questions, unless you're willing to ask directly about circumcision in an email. Therapy is a bit like dating, so you'll need a bit of resolve to keep looking if the first therapist you find is insensitive, or just isn't a good fit.

Also, I saw a study recently that said female therapists tend to be more receptive to circumcision's harms compared to male therapists. Low sample size, but here it is (link to full PDF on the page):

https://www.newmalestudies.com/OJS/index.php/nms/article/view/261

If you know you're more comfortable with male therapists, then I would say that overrides everything else. However, I've personally noticed that men tend to take very strong stances on this issue one way or the other, while women tend to be more fluid, curious, and empathic around this.

Good luck! If you find a good therapist for this, please consider sharing your story on /r/CircumcisionGrief (as long as you're comfortable, of course). I'd love to hear someone's success story.

P.S. I originally saw your post in /r/sex, and I'm so glad you posted here. /r/sex is a bad place to discuss circumcision. Also wtf askmen, why would they threaten a ban???

mgtowolf · 2019-12-14T16:28:00+00:00

btw I asked this in r/askmen and it was removed and I was told I would be banned for asking again and to enjoy my dick

That's fucked up yo

Lethn · 2019-12-14T16:07:16+00:00

Fucking hell, I don't know what to tell you on that, hopefully someone here will have something but unfortunately there are still a large number of people who consider circumcision to be a normal thing that men should shut up about.

I have no idea if there will be any genuine help for you I'm afraid.

theskullcrusher8776 · 2019-12-14T16:40:09+00:00

Maybe try to do foreskin restoration it's better than staying like that but it can take a while. Maybe one day foregen will be able to fix this issue. As of the subject of therapy I can't really help you sadly but I hope you will feel better

trash62 · 2019-12-14T18:25:35+00:00

btw I asked this in /r/askmen and it was removed and I was told I would be banned for asking again and to enjoy my dick

Seems like askmen is really just a group of guys trying to impress the ladies.

I don't know what to say about the grief except that for me it was about the limitations imposed by identifying as a body. Our bodies (and the male body in particular, curcumsized or not) are pretty lousy at sex.

The part of my life that was taken is ultimately tied to this, and I went on to practice some spiritual exercises which (with years of practice) are showing me that the sensation was never really in my physical body to begin with. That to really enjoy it, I need to step out of body identification itself.

If you are ticklish, you might start there (if you decide to do what I did) where, exactly, do you feel the tickles. Pay attention, I bet it isn't in the body. :)

Wouldn't recommend seeing a professional. Psychology pretends to be a science, but it isn't. All you would end up doing is validating and encouraging some feminist psychotherapist. In essence, a professional might end up making the problem worse.

z770i1 · 2019-12-16T00:42:46+00:00

Just try different ones. The best bet

Title	How to find the right therapist for circumcision grief?
Author	Ctown_struggles00
Upvotes	8
Comments	6
Date	December 14, 2019 3:44 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/eal768/how_to_find_the_right_therapist_for_circumcision/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/how-to-find-the-right-therapist-for-circumcision.1202105 https://theredarchive.com/post/1202105

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