Yo what's up boys, it's AsianAdonis with the usual monthly post.

I figured out firsthand that I was chasing women for mainly ego purposes, not because I was horny.

I met this cute girl 2 weeks ago and we went on a date to the park. Instantly I could feel that she was super into me and was trying to please and within 3 minutes of us sitting down on a park bench, she was already tracing my jawline. I had done the usual friendly touching of the waist and back but nothing too extreme. Eventually, we end up kissing and we bang.

However, the most important part here was my thoughts and emotions at the time. When she escalated on me so easily, I didn't feel happiness, I just felt an inner emptiness and dread, like I didn't even have to try. The feeling of having something gifted to me based purely on my looks and not on my social skills, which I had been working on, made me pretty disappointed as I didn't really get to game this chick and improve my game.

Another event that led me to the conclusion that getting laid was tied inextricably with my self-worth was my feelings on previous dates where I didn't manage to close. I would always feel like shit every single time and blame myself.

I've identified this pattern now. Although there are periods where I feel like I want to fuck, I still channel that energy into gaming girls (cold approach mainly) but I try to choose not to feel bad when I don't have a date setup because at the end of the day, fucking this chick isn't going to improve me as a person and my self-worth and value as a man isn't defined by girls, but by my actions, thoughts and the things that I create.

Now that I've stopped caring so much about women, a lot of things have opened up. I'm more direct with what I want from girls and usually get it. I don't really care if girls flake or not since there's always gonna be others and they don't really matter anymore.

At the end of the day, girls are the icing on the cake. You don't need the icing to have a great cake and icing won't necessarily make a bad cake better. However, icing can elevate an already great cake. Be that great cake.

TLDR: I was chasing women for ego because I had tied my self-worth to how many girls I fucked. This left me unhappy and after I realized this from a first date, I stopped this and I've been getting so many more girls, but it's left me somewhat empty.

The below Youtube video explains how I feel in more depth:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDS8gumHm6s&t=16s

Youtube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFGBhjOQP509R7pRg__dBfg

Tiktok:

https://www.tiktok.com/@asianadonis?lang=en