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I want to ask a question of those who are good at social circle game

RussianBoa · 2021-10-31T06:35:01+00:00

AKA naturals, IMO, because they go hand in hand. It's kinda late here, but it's something that's been bothering me....

RussianBoa

October 31, 2021

1 upvotes

/r/seduction

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Post Information

Title	I want to ask a question of those who are good at social circle game
Author	RussianBoa
Upvotes	1
Comments	7
Date	October 31, 2021 6:35 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/qjjs5g/i_want_to_ask_a_question_of_those_who_are_good_at/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-want-to-ask-a-question-of-those-who-are-good-at.1273234 https://theredarchive.com/post/1273234

Comments

[–]norwegiandoggo 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]RussianBoa[S] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

So, naturals and those good at social circle game are in my mind synonymous.

S.C. game is my cryptonite, but earlier this year my friends set up a triple date with themselves and me and a girl named Danielle. They game me her number, we chatted a bit afterwards, then she ghosted me.

So: here I am, ghosted by someone WITHIN his social circle. I see Danielle every couple of months, incluing last night. And logically, I feel awkward AF, and try to not interact with her. A part of me wants to approach her and be like WTF I can't even enjoy myself because of your ghosting ass. But that's not socially calibrated, now is it?

But also, I don't like to feel awkward and uncomfortable around a group of friends - because of the actions of one individual. And it would be silly to proactively avoid going to functions where she will be present. That's just childish and immature.

This is one of those damned if you do, damned if you don't. Any SC-proficient guys able to guide me in the right direction? I'm 34, and facing a problem of a 14 year old, and yet: here I am.

What do, fellas?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]RussianBoa[S] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]norwegiandoggo 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

So, naturals and those good at social circle game are in my mind synonymous.

Naturals are often good with social circle game..but that's doesn't mean everyone that's good at social circle game are natural. I'm not a natural.

S.C. game is my cryptonite...she ghosted me So: here I am, ghosted by someone WITHIN his social circle. I see Danielle every couple of months, incluing last night. And logically, I feel awkward AF, and try to not interact with her.

Guys with good social circle game also get rejected and ghosted by women in their social circle. It happens all the time. Don't think they have a perfect success rate, they don't. However, the difference is that they're very smooth and cool about rejection.

So you got ghosted. How does it make you feel? Inferior? Weak? Sad? Dissapointed? Like a loser? Like social circle game is your cryptonite? Awkward? That they're all making fun of you or look down on you? These are all bad ways to handle rejection. Instead, a natural or person skilled in social circle game is 100% okay with it. They see rejection as a natural part of life. They just chock it up to incompatibility. She just wasn't interested. Not every girl will be, despite the fact that I'm a super attractive guy, I can't win them all. But that doesn't mean I will kick her out of the group. She's of course welcome and will be treated with respect. She will feel that her rejecting me had zero consequences and she will feel comfortable.

There are no situations that are awkward unless you make them so. This is a new situation and people are going to look around for someone to take the lead in what the "tone" of how everyone is going to react to that. So you can either set the tone that it's cool and you're still a hot as fuck guy and she doesn't know what she's missing. Or you can set the tone that you're a loser and things will be awkward now. It's up to you.

A part of me wants to approach her and be like WTF I can't even enjoy myself because of your ghosting ass. But that's not socially calibrated, now is it?

Yeah, damn right. If you do this, you appear angry for being rejected, which is a big no no.

What do, fellas?

Let's say she joins you for the next social outting. You can simply walk up to her and say "I apologize for my friends trying to set us up or push you into some kind of group date. You should never feel pressured to do anything you don't want to do. Friends?" And then hold out your hand.

Last thing I'll leave you with is that people with good social circle game have typically created their own social circle and they are therefore the defacto leader of their group. The fact that this girl who ghosted you can "show up" to social things you are all doing as a group tells me that you didn't create this group and/or you aren't the leader. Because if you were the leader you could simply choose who to invite and who can't come. So if you didn't want to see her again, no problem, she just wouldn't be invited. Trying to do social circle game in a group when someone else is the leader/creator of the group is usually very difficult.

[–]RussianBoa[S] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link