What to make of this: Girl is "hot" all night (making out with me, following me around, hugging me from behind, etc.) and then very cold all of the sudden.

2017-04-10T01:07:08+00:00

I believe there was a Katy Perry song about this.

recyclablebanthas · 2017-04-10T05:29:47+00:00

_______1: So much information left out_________

The first time she didn't turn cold. That time I went back to her house and slept over but I decided not to fuck her.

Assuming that this girl isn't a mannequin but a real person, what she did matters and you're leaving that part out.

What was she doing at the time that you decided you didn't want to have sex?
How far did it actually escalate that night?
How did she react to this at the time?

The first time she did this 180, she left the group after violently making out with me. When we met up again, she completely avoided my advances. Whereas 10 minutes ago I would only need to stand next to her for her to grab me and make out, now she looked uncomfortable....

You're kind of dropping us in the middle of it here.

What was happening directly before and after she was "violently making out" with you? This is vital information and you're leaving it out. Something happened there that could have given you a clue and you apparently weren't paying attention.
Where were you guys and what were you doing?
What can you recall about her exact words and actions before and after she was making out with you and then left?

Second time was basically the same. Hot hot hot (again, as thirsty for me as possible, borderline making a fool out of herself)

......she.....then told the Uber to take her to her house after dropping me off.

Again, you're leaving ALL the details out. It's like saying you did some math operation to 2 numbers and got 10 and then asking us to tell you what numbers you used.

What were you doing when you went out this third time? Like before you ended up in the Uber. Where were you when she was "borderline making a fool out of herself?"
Who were you with? Anyone else?

________2: My best guess based on incomplete information__________

I should mention also that I was not being as receptive to her as a would have liked because the people present at all of these situations made it uncomfortable for me to do so.....

Saved the most important hint of information for the end here.

So..... she has been advancing on you and you've turned her down for sex and held her at a distance, effectively rejecting her in front of your mutual friends. Like you don't want them to see it? Then you're apparently fine trying to be more sexual when no one is looking.

And you wonder why she is doing 180s? You're treating her like crap, it sounds like. Which is a turn off.

Alternatively, you've left a lot of information out and it seems problematic that this girl is "all over you" in such a way, in public. Depending on where you guys were, it sounds odd and a little off.

And overall, if you aren't comfortable with PDAs in front of your friends with this girl, then you might change girls and go for someone you aren't embarrassed about your friends knowing about.

______3: Guilty?________

.....with a clear conscience.

What does this have to do with you feeling guilty? Why would reciprocating with her in front of your friends make you feel bad?

DrVonDickerson · 2017-04-10T05:47:09+00:00

If she's cold, be a gentleman and give her your sweater. God, you're forgetting the basics. 101, man.

theoldcrow5179 · 2017-04-10T08:58:53+00:00

I'm getting the sense that there isn't much communication between you guys about your emotions and feelings. You're telling me you're guessing how she's feeling, so I think privately (and respectfully) telling her how you're feeling is the best step. Maybe tell her that you've been really enjoying spending time with her, and you'd like to spend more time with her, and that you're feeling confused, or unclear (or whatever other emotions you're feeling) because of what she's done, and you want to get clarification.

UoAPUA · 2017-04-10T04:45:09+00:00

I think you're on the right track. She's probably wondering why you won't fuck her lol. But who knows, it does sound very weird.

Woujo · 2017-04-10T04:57:12+00:00

Did you become needy and overly aggressive once she was hot?

2017-04-10T06:34:12+00:00

You're probably getting played, she's using you to make her boyfriend jealous.

Raiiderss · 2017-04-11T17:07:03+00:00

Had a girl make plans to come stay with me in my college town before she even broke up with her boyfriend. Broke up with him, came to my place that weekend (a weekend before she originally planned to) we had sex. Then she came back the next weekend for 3 nights, then we just spent another 2 nights just this last weekend. So 3 weekends in a row immediately after her breakup. She's not talking to me now and I'm a tiny bit bummed but I think I get why ahaha

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