Being on this subreddit makes me more self-conscious.

puaCurveBall · 2012-08-14T21:25:55+00:00

Do you have any hobbies that you are good at?

The same thing happens... if you are good at ping pong, you'll laugh when you think about so many people playing who have no idea what they are doing, not using spin or keeping ball low to net.

Learning about game is about raising your level of game. If you are fine with your level of success, then you don't need it. If you are looking for better success, then you need to get better... ignoring the rules and mindsets that are out there won't help.

I look at it as any skill, if you are looking to be the best, then you have to accept that you'll suck for awhile and will have to deal with a steep learning curve... just name of the game for anything in life.

avonv · 2012-08-14T23:34:56+00:00

you need to decide what is for you and how you define success. sounds like you haven't defined yours own goals but are letting others define what your goals should be

joecartoon72 · 2012-08-15T02:24:49+00:00

This is completely natural. I was in your exact situation (I feel that's said so often here, but I guess that's why people come here, because so many of us have been there before) a few months ago. I got out of a, putting it lightly, absurd relationship, and I was definitely hung up on them as well. Then I found this sub reddit, and felt as well that it was making me so much more self conscious of all these "rules" and dos and don'ts. And truth is, it is doing this, but I'll let you know this: that stops once You have fully grasped what everyone here is talking about, and you basically evolve into that better person you are aiming to become here.

How I see it now is this: when you're learning something new, lets say a new workout routine, people will ALWAYS tell you to focus on form and technique, it's the most important, etc. And this is true, it is the most important, and while you learn this new "work out" you really need to focus on form again and again. But eventually, you stop focusing on the form, because it becomes second nature. It's there, and perfected, but no longer on your mind.

This is inner game, and in my opinion is much harder to master than outer game (in my personal opinion), seeing as that just takes multiple approaches over and over again. Inner game is a mindset that needs to be overcome and mastered. My advice would be to try to get out of your head more often (I know this is a lot harder said than done), do anything that helps you stop thinking (I personally love to sing, act, rock climb, or play guitar, and while I do any of these I do not think, I do). This is basically the complicated way of saying what everyone else here is saying: have fun with your life. The more and more you do this, the more this mindset, this lack of thinking and more doing, will spill over into your game. Best of luck mate.

Title	Being on this subreddit makes me more self-conscious.
Author	Depressed_Economist
Upvotes	9
Comments	4
Date	August 14, 2012 9:12 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/y830j/being_on_this_subreddit_makes_me_more/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/being-on-this-subreddit-makes-me-more-self.1301624 https://theredarchive.com/post/1301624

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