I fell in love with this girl I was seeing my last semester of college. She broke up with me in March. I lost 10 lbs. I haven't spoken to her since even though I'm still thinking about her every day. I graduated college in May. I'm unemployed still. Student loan payments are coming up in a short while. You think that would be enough motivation for me to get up off my ass and find a job but no. I'm depressed and all I want to do is sleep. I had been working out 6 days a week after the breakup up until July when all of a sudden my past anxiety problems have crept back up on me and I've been fighting back panic attacks for the last 2 months. I had gained 25lbs and some good strength and now I've started shrinking again because I had a minor panic attack when leaving the gym a few weeks ago and I'm hesitant to go back. I feel completely incompetent in the job search and that I can't do anything while all my friends are working and making moves. I masturbate about 3x a day on average. I have zero motivation.

I'm seeing a therapist now and starting to meditate. I really need some help because I need to get my life together.