I am insta-friend-zoned a lot because of my voice.

2011-07-20T20:16:13+00:00

Most likely it's not your voice, but your vowels. The stereotypical flamboyant homosexual men's speech has very drawn-out vowels. (Relevant: http://www.suntimes.com/lifestyles/5497252-423/straight-or-gay-vowels-in-speech-may-give-it-away.html)

If you don't want to change the way you pronounce vowels, maybe wave your arms around less?

Mujestyc · 2011-07-20T20:51:44+00:00

sign language ;)

bonus points to if you teach her abc's

2011-07-20T21:17:22+00:00

Embrace it. Watch some interviews with Neil Strauss. My gaydar was going off hardcore watching him, but he is one of the most successful PUAs ever.

2011-07-21T01:25:14+00:00

First impression: Be a stereotypical manly man for the first half of meeting.

no_dating · 2011-07-21T04:24:12+00:00

First off, this isn't such a huge handicap. Look up a video of Neil Strauss and hear how fruity he sounds! So you're not really blazing a new trail here.

However, it is NOT what you say, but HOW you say it. This is the basis of seduction and all effective communication. Subtlety and implication are very powerful, but if you sound like a fruitcake, it could come across as being a gay and a bottom. Remember, gay men do sometimes flirt with women as a way of being friendly.

Unless you want to become the next Neil Strauss, and have women think "how did I hook up with such a fruitcake?," I suggest that you learn to speak like a man. Your voice needs to resonate in your chest, use the bass end of your vocal cords, and reserve the higher tones for emphasis and questions. Unfortunately, your problem is beyond just sounding boyish; you sound gay. You don't just need an injection of testosterone; you need to completely reconstruct your manner of speaking, and your friends will notice.

On the bright side, you'll be able to summon up the best, most convincing gay voice for your playful antics after you've straightened this out.

howtogetmanvoice · 2011-07-21T04:40:23+00:00

I had kinda the same issue and here are my options/advice:

1) Embrace it. This is about understanding/developing/appreciating your identity. This is your choice. Personally, I think you'll be more confident with a deeper change /pun

2) I read in some ebook that the reason for high-pitch voices is your vocal cords getting stressed/stretched by your neck muscles failing to support your head (weight). Basically, you need to develop your neck muscles so they can support your head which allows your vocal cords to relax. The exercise I remember was laying down on a couch/bed with your neck hanging over the edge. Lay on each side and curl your head/neck from hanging over the side til you reach near your shoulder (the up position) or as far as you can go. Do 3 sets of 6-10 reps for each side of your neck for a few days and you should start noticing a difference.

3) Personally my problem was more of an issue with taking an active voice. Mostly throughout daily conversations I'm reserved and talk quiet, almost sad or depressed like I had a bad day. Eventually I got fed up with this (and people asking if I'm alright) and now I take an active voice and look at speaking as a way of acting/living. IE: change your tone for a line and it makes/breaks the set. This is all brought back to being confident/happy- your voice can change your mood and vice versa IMO. You got to view how you speak, not just what you say, as an attribute of your personality. You have a decent amount of control over this, it's just a matter of taking the effort.

lordfat · 2011-07-21T17:38:46+00:00

Look up Meehow on youtube. He talks like a fag and pulls girls left and right.

2011-07-20T20:02:26+00:00

I was going to offer some books and CDs on developing your voice to where you want it to be, but you said you like your voice and don't want to change it.

So it's all about what you say, not how you say it. Girls won't assume you're gay if you make it clear right from the start you're interested. If you don't want to change your voice, you could change your body language.

Title	I am insta-friend-zoned a lot because of my voice.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	3
Comments	12
Date	July 20, 2011 7:35 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/iv3vf/i_am_instafriendzoned_a_lot_because_of_my_voice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-am-insta-friend-zoned-a-lot-because-of-my-voice.1320438 https://theredarchive.com/post/1320438

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