How To Spot Crazy:

Before I start this, I want to make clear that there is no concrete definition of "crazy". There are varying degrees of what we like to call crazy and even then, it seems a harsh term because we all have our issues that can be worked through with the right help and mindset.

I would also like to point out, though, that no one changes any self defining characteristic unless they alone believe that there is a problem and want to change(similar to drug rehab…). Not because you said they need to or gave them an ultimatum or any other reason you think should work because, trust me, it won't.

  • Insecurity: This is the root of all evil. Insecurity is the basis for every form of crazy from daddy issues to just about any other internal problem your girl could possibly have. If you're smart you wont underestimate what deep rooted insecurity can make a person do. That being said, we all have our faults but what I'm talking about goes beyond that. This insecurity defines their lives, and affects just about every important decision they make. It is the underlying reason for every common trait of the crazy I'm about to give you.

  • Extremes are bad.Take this advice with a grain of salt but I feel it can pretty much be applied to any aspect of life. If they have no girl friends, no guy friends, have never had a relationship(this may or may not be a problem depending on age of course), have had an abnormal amount of relationships or hook ups for their age, do an abnormal amount of drugs or drinking… I could go on for days but the point stands. Extremes are almost never a good thing because they represent an attempt at compensation for lack of something. Every girl shit talks, gets jealous, hooks up, has insecurities, and wants you to show love and acceptance to an extent. What you need to look out for is when these things are taken to an extreme.

Again, with every one of these examples, keep in mind that there is no "yes" or "no" answer to whether it applies to your girl. The only question is to what extent. No one had a perfect childhood and some kids can handle their shit better than others, so these examples need to be paired with subjective observation and a good dose of common sense.

  • Family Issues (it's not always daddy's fault)- I say this because it is, in fact, not always daddy's fault. While a father may have a slightly larger impact on his daughters psyche regarding dating and befriending males, many times it's simply "parent issues". Often, girls will seek what they lacked as a child. Sadly enough, this is the situation with a lot of children who experience and early death or abandonment from one or both parents. If it was the love of a father, as it often times is, she will probably seem clingy, seeking acceptance and constant reassurance of your affection. Maybe they were never "good enough" or second rate to one of their siblings growing up. Maybe their father was dominant and abusive making them gravitate towards an abusive and controlling boyfriend or the other way around. Be wary of rocky parent- child relationships, especially ones devoid of love, as they almost always spell trouble. The effect of a damaging childhood can vary from person to person but it always has some significant effect and never a positive one.

Rule of thumb: If you meet the parents and one or more of them is what you would consider crazy and/or unstable then chances are your girl caught some of the crazy too. The parents almost never lie.

  • Friends: If they can't maintain platonic friendships with girls or guys what makes you think they can successfully handle a relationship? This pretty much holds true for anyone. If drama and chaos is a main component in their other relationships, why would yours be any different. Things like constant shit talking and hating on people shows extreme insecurity and is a big shiny red flag for you to watch out for. Likewise, very often girls with little to no friends will quickly make you the center of their universe and, needless to say, they wont want to give you up the day you decide you've had enough.

  • Manipulation, Jealousy and Trust: This is a pretty common one across the board. If she's constantly trying to make you jealous or trying to get a reaction out of you by flirting or talking about other guys, this is a bad sign. On the same note if she is pessimistic and constantly tired or hurt or sick or anything of the sort this is someone you want to stay away from. Misery loves company. If she attempts to keep you with her by threatening herself, you, your things, your loved ones, and especially your cat. Get the fuck out. No exceptions. Any kind of lying, snooping through your belongings without reason, or constant interrogation of your comings and goings are all big red flags. Also, if this wasn't obvious enough, your girl should never be upset at you or "jealous" of you having a good time without her. Within reason.

  • Materialistic: This one is fairly self explanatory. Buying her something, especially an expensive something should be a rare treat given because you genuinely want to make her happy with no underlying motive. Not because she'll "surprise" you when you get home if you buy her that necklace or any of that bullshit. Do not trade material for sex. She will clean you out and move on to the next sucker. You're together because you enjoy each others company not because you make 100k+ a year.

  • The Family Seeker: Ahh the infamous I only poked a hole in all of your condoms so we could have a baby and live happily ever after girl. This should really be under the family issues section but i felt like it deserved its own. This girl never knew what it was like to have a real family and is desperate for that feeling of security and belonging. If you two have just started seeing each other and she's constantly commenting on how cute your kids would be, the wedding dress she wants, and how twenty years from now you better not still be working at sonic, leave before she uses your little sea monkeys against you.

Lastly, listen to those around you. Feelings for someone are blinding and sometimes an objective view from a friend can really reveal a lot, even if it's hard to accept at first.

I'm sure i missed a lot so comment for additions guys.