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[–]rickyseddit 5 points6 points7 points 13 years ago* (13 children) | Copy Link
Don't listen to wombat999 please. My rule is usually if its under $10 theres no question you should pay, unless she insists twice. If she insists once, say something like, "It's ok you can get the next one ;)". If she really insists let her pay, shouldn't turn it into a big deal.
Now, one thing that seddit has taught me is don't do things like dinner dates with a girl you don't know well. You could be set up for a few hours of awkwardness and a hit to your wallet for nothing because you realize you were only physically attracted to this girl but had no real connection. It also puts a lot of pressure on both of you needlessly.
Same goes for movies, absolute waste of money and time and super awkward if its a girl you haven't closed with yet. You sit next to her and don't learn a thing about her for 2 hours. Don't do it.
Something better would be a daytime activity, maybe a picnic, some sport that you both play, billiards/pool, the beach (if you're closeby, bowling (super easy for kino). Anything that is fun and interactive, and allows you to show that you are a fun and friendly guy. It's better if its a place that you go to often because that shows that you are a socially valuable man. Think of something creative and different and she will have fun and probably be into you.
Then you can transition to another place. This is where I get to my point: if you have two activities, you can take turns paying. There is no rule that says you have to pay for every activity; however I think the general rule of thumb is, the more she likes you, the less important it is that you pay. But that's only in my experience.
This answer turned out pretty long and rambling but I hope it helps.
[–]NaturalAFC 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good advice, thanks. Yea, I actually live in a coastal town, so we will probably walk to the beach after getting coffee if she's down. I agree on the dinner date thing; it is good for getting to know someone, but it's too cliche IMO.
Bowling is always a good choice, but I like to bring girls to a gun range. It's different and (as long as they're not shooting something crazy large) they usually really enjoy it.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
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[–]rickyseddit 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
Some people use seduction as a tool not just a means to an end (sex). If you really insist paying for coffee is that terrible you are pretty cheap. And your attitude towards women seems a little crass too.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]rickyseddit 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
A tool to better oneself socially and be more successful with women as well as other areas of life really. The end game may be sex alone for you and lots of people and that's totally fine, but some people actually enjoy women and see them as at least somewhat more than a vehicle to bust into.
Noone said anything about being the "nice guy", lose the false dichotomy. You can be confident and attractive without being a douche, and if buying a cup of coffee makes that big of difference your game is weak anyway.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]rickyseddit 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Not telling you how to live your life but apelike kinda does fit now that you mention it. There's more than one type of guy who pulls bro, trust me. Have fun being a douche though it sounds like you really have it figured out.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]rickyseddit 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Every once in a while? Try errday bro i'm jerkin it right now, Sandy from spongebob is a babe.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's really your call. Don't pay for dinners or any of that bullshit but a $4 coffee? You are inviting her out, and you don't want to look cheap either, or make it awkward.
IMO I would suggest to not verbalize paying, but simply act as if it was already agreed. Have her order first, then put your order in while talking out your wallet. When I do this a lot of the time the girl will resist me paying, and after some token resistance I simply just let her.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]rickyseddit 5 points6 points7 points (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]NaturalAFC 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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