Not sure how to listen correctly without being an emotional sponge

recyclablebantha · 2013-11-06T12:58:23+00:00

I feel like when I ask her questions the give her the opportunity to express how she feels about something, that I am just sponging all of these feelings.

There's nothing inherent in getting her to talk, that means she's going to dump emotions on you. There's nothing in getting her to talk that requires you to sponge feelings up.

Could you be more specific? Perhaps give an example?
What kinds of questions are you asking them?

Galvan123 · 2013-11-06T19:53:14+00:00

Well, I was thinking on that too.

I came into conclusion that there are times that empathy is counterproductive. Dont' get me wrong. Empathy is a must in social relationships.

But there are some exceptions. If you want to level up the mood of a group, you need to not get into their mood and focus on a fun thing to do.

This is similar. Don't live her story. Listen to what she says, think logically "Why is she feeling bad?" "What did she do behind her story?" "What will make her smile considering all that?".

Pit_Sweat · 2013-11-06T23:26:45+00:00

You have to lead the conversation. Sure, she does most of the talking, but eventually there will be lulls and pauses in the conversation where you get the chance to change directions if you want to. So if she starts complaining and emotionally dumping on you, it's your job to change the subject and talk about something else and not sit there and be the tampon.

Also, you have to be able to see this coming and take action as early as possible because if she's practically been crying on your shoulder for the past 20 minutes and then you go "So hey how about that weather eh?" You're gonna look like an asshole.

2013-11-06T09:49:08+00:00

You dont pay attention. You lean back, look around, act disinterested. Memorize the meaning of "laconic" and become it. You're a fucking king, you have better shit to do than to listen to her emotional vomit.

Title	Not sure how to listen correctly without being an emotional sponge
Author	ItWasAllAnIllusion
Upvotes	5
Comments	4
Date	November 6, 2013 6:40 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1q0fap/not_sure_how_to_listen_correctly_without_being_an/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/not-sure-how-to-listen-correctly-without-being-an.1361139 https://theredarchive.com/post/1361139

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