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Jlucky14
[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
This is more common than you might think. Many (not all) women really hate being single, so when they're unhappy in their relationship instead of breaking up with their boyfriend they just get all flirty with other guys. Once they have secured a new bf or are very close to doing so, that's when they break up.
People who say stuff like "if she cheats with you, she'll cheat on you" are correct but are missing part of the picture. She'll cheat on you if she thinks she can do better. But a lot of women just work like that. It's not something you should get upset about. It's just how the game is played. Sometimes you steal the girl, sometimes the girl is stolen from you. That's why you don't get too invested.
[–]anonoah 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This. I have lots of female friends who (whether consciously or not) do this. It's called "jumping". The rationale that I've heard is basically that they don't realize that they're unhappy in their relationship until suddenly they meet some new guy who is making them happy.
I personally kind of hate jumpers because its so cowardly, but I also have a close friend who does this and she's still a good person.
Interestingly, I had a FwB situation with a girl who had a boyfriend recently. I never really understood what she was thinking but she was otherwise a good person.
On the flip-side, I once stole my one-itis girl from her BF and was very happy. Eventually we broke up and she jumped to my best friend. So there's also that.
I say go for it, just don't get attached, and set boundaries.
[–]tantricengineer 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I call this "emotional failover": a procedure by which a person automatically transfers emotion to a "duplicate" (replacement) partner when it detects a fault or failure with their current one. This is obviously naive way of going about relationships, but we still see it happen all the time.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If she is willing to cheat with you, she will cheat on you. Don't get involved with her - why fuck up another guy's life?
If you are really keen on getting involved and she complains about her bf a lot and it seems like their relationship is on the out, tell her to give you a call when she's single, but not before. You're giving her all your attention for no return and she still goes home to her bf.
Been on the end of this myself. Had a girl I hung around with ask to sleep with me, always asking to come back to mine. She had a bf at the time and I said that she was welcome to back to mine but not whilst she was still with her bf - did she dump him - course not.
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[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]anonoah 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]tantricengineer 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link