Context: I'm usually dating a few women constantly. I typically only go on first dates and never bother again, most of the women I meet are meek, boring, and we hook up once or twice and I just never bother again. I don't feel particularly attracted to any of the women I date. I recently got out of a relationship in which my gf cheated on me and that's really fucked up things for me. I mostly enjoy the company of women and I used to date a lot before my gf so the transition was seamless. But I haven't I haven't really enjoyed sex at all since my gf. I'll admit the sex with these women was often rushed, cramped(in a car), and usually it would end quickly on my part. I haven't been keeping any relations with any of these women, whether sex happens or doesn't happen or will happen on the next date I don't bother.

Main post:

I've been dating a lot recently, it's become routine and boring to me now so I went on a date with this girl expecting the same hook up then part ways.

She's average, a little overweight even but her personality polarized me and that worked for her, in fact, she annoyed me a little and I kind of hated her. It was a good change from the boring girls I've been dating. While she may not be the best looking her personality is a mirror of mine, and I like that a lot. She's smart, and witty, and a little bit charming and very vulnerable which is attractive but she has low self esteem and is incredibly self deprecating and is kind of very unfeminine to be honest.

I'd go out with her except the girl is an emotional mess. She got out of a 3 year relationship 4 weeks ago. She's not over her bf. She admittedly uses online dating apps to validate herself, she's on 3 different sites which is fucked up.

She hasn't ridden the cock carasoel yet because she's new to dating but she is desperately searching for alpha cock. her number is 3. All her dates went awfully and I was the first good one and honestly I doubt most betas could handle a girl like this. The first date we went on, she got a little too tipsy. Her polarizing personality and drunkenness turned me off and I didn't bother to kiss her. I planned on not meet her again but I had fun talking to her, exchanging banter, etc.

I just wasn't particularly attracted to her. This however, is usual since I'm rarely if ever attracted to the women I date. I don't know how to feel about them. She has this image of me as some super player that sleeps with many women...she told me she would be perfectly fine being monogamous to me while I spun plates. That was pretty fucking cool.

She was something else though, so after her sending me a bunch of texts after our first date asking for a second I decided to go on another date with her. She texted me, "Just kiss me damn it!!" At least she was entertaining and fun and I enjoyed talking with her. She baked me cookies and brought them with her as an apology for being dumb and drunk, that was sweet and a turn on.

We chilled on the beach and talked, we were physically comfortable with each other but she talked a little about her relationship. We got a little buzzed and I went in for a kiss, however she hasn't kissed anyone since her bf and would do silly things like look away, start talking very quickly, make her mouth in a weird shape, or try to break the tension by saying something stupid or silly and laughing but she kept saying she wanted me to kiss her.

Normally I wouldn't give a fuck and go for it but I didn't because I empathized with this girl and started caring for her(beta). I didn't mind because I wasn't particularly trying to fuck her so I enjoyed this game of teasing her, making her nervous. It was endearing but at the same time it turned me off and i was "over it." It told me she wasn't ready. She nibbled at my neck and started to get a little turned on.

We transitioned to the car and started cuddling and talking, I was over trying to fuck her and very conflicted whether I should go for it or not. Mostly I felt bad for her situation, I was holding on to her boobs and ass under clothes but it was a more of an intimate sensual thing. She was stroking my face, hair, body, etc. I liked cuddling with her since I haven't had that intimacy in a long time and I had hooked up with so many women and had shitty sex I was over wanting to have sex with anyone.

Basically I sort of friend zoned this girl?

Eventually she got really turned on and started kissing my neck, biting my ears and being very aggressive. She basically tried to kiss me for 20 minutes. It turned me off and I told her bluntly I wasn't interested in kissing her or having sex with her but she kept trying. It got a little awkward for me. She was disappointed I didn't kiss her or fuck her and really wanted it.

My reasons that I didn't tell her where.

  • This girl is a mess, not ready to date a guy. Her problems where a turn off for me and I felt bad for her.

  • I enjoy hanging out with this girl and I'm afraid sex will ruin the relationship

  • I enjoy her companionship

  • I don't want to be the rebound guy. I never wanted to see my rebound girl because of the bad feelings it stirred in me.

  • The sex won't be enjoyable for either of us and it won't feel as good as her bf because hookups are never equal to relationship sex and I don't particularly care to have sex with her.

  • I'm worried about my performance, which admittedly hasn't been that good

  • She's on the search for alpha cock, and wants to ride the cock carousal and I don't want to be emotionally involved with her

  • It brought feelings of my breakup back.

  • I'm slightly uncomfortable at liking a girl who's a mess, so my natural reaction is to turn away.

  • I'm scared of getting involved with anyone right now. I don't trust women anymore and I'm still hurt over what happened. Trust/Intimacy issues.

So what should I do TRP?

  1. Hook up with her and see where things go, possibly become fwb or transition to friends(Possible)

  2. Become friends(Unsustainable because I don't like non-sexual platonic relationships with women)

  3. or stop talking to her?