Question regarding first 'proper' relationship

Jack__Knife · 2017-05-26T16:44:38+00:00

I guess i'm just looking for some advice on how to maintain the attraction and ensure that i am not 'chasing' her or being needy.

A needy man is deeply afraid that what he has to give is not enough (or that he is not worthy). How not to be needy- In fact, you don’t need to be a bad guy for women to be attracted to you. However, I personally believe in learning from others. So, yes, you can learn many things and habits from attractive men.

Being late for a date – In fact, women come late to dates all the time. It’s just a date, you can be 5 minutes late. In fact, you will find out that even if you are late, many times the girl will come even later. And don’t bring flowers!

Don’t call more than once – You called the girl and she didn’t answer? There is nothing urgent that you need to tell her. She might call you back (some girls do), and if not, you can try calling again tomorrow.

Don’t be too available – Don’t answer every call from her. If you are busy in the moment, she can wait. Show her that you have other things to do and other people to meet with. Yes, you can tell her that you are busy even if you’re not. But the better option is really to have hobbies and interesting things to do.

Flirt with other women – A great way to not be needy is just to have other women and other options in your life.

React to her moves – Neediness is a relative thing. If a woman tells you that she loves you, you can say that too. But if she doesn’t answer your calls, and mistreats you, so do the same.

Don’t show that you want her more than she wants you.

marthdotsk · 2017-05-26T17:13:11+00:00

I think you need to ask yourself if she has to be your number one focus in life. My opinion is that she doesn't. Sounds harsh, right? But her number one focus in her life is... well, her life. And yours should be yours.

Your life has much, much more than "this one girl" to offer, and that's what you have to keep in mind. If the girl stays in your life, cool! Unlikely in this day and age, but definitely cool if it happens. However, she shouldn't be what your life revolves around. From your perspective, your interests should revolve around your life, not the other way around.

So yeah, focus on improving your life and yourself as much as you can. If she's around to support you, great! You should also be around to support her in that endeavor. If she's not around, well she's not around, but you can still kill it in life. However, acting needy will hinder her, from her perception, in her own endeavors. Hence why she gets cold feet.

So my opinion is that you need to reconsider your focus. It's a matter of mindset at that point.

2017-05-26T19:07:08+00:00

I have a steady GF and rarely text her unless I'm setting up a date or I find something relevant going on in my life and want to share it with her. A needy guy is afraid of losing a girl, you really shouldn't be, and if you do, well the relationship is probably at an end anyway.

Title	Question regarding first 'proper' relationship
Author	turbo100
Upvotes	1
Comments	5
Date	May 26, 2017 3:07 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/6dhie3/question_regarding_first_proper_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/question-regarding-first-proper-relationship.1425237 https://theredarchive.com/post/1425237

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