Talking to Girls in public - I am still anxious AF after 3 years

DLmessi10 · 2017-11-26T07:50:22+00:00

Be courageous Courage is not the act of feeling no fear, but act of feeling the fear and going things anyway

kinpsychosis · 2017-11-26T09:55:51+00:00

It sounds to me like you are worried about messing up the approach itself.

Don’t approach with the ocular desire of succeeding, approach a girl with the intention of fucking it up.

It honestly doesn’t matter if the girl turns you down or not.

Actually, spoiler; you will be turned down.

Not because you did anything wrong but because there are a lot of factors that come into play for why she isn’t interested that has nothing to do with you at all.

You could do everything right and still be turned down.

Ever since I started talking to girls without an end goal in mind it has gone a lot better.

In fact, you shouldn’t even be hoping to do anything until you get to know the girl anyway! Maybe she is batshit crazy, maybe she isn’t your type or whatever the reason.

Always test the water for just as much as she decides if you are her type, you should also be wondering if she is yours.

Conclusion: Go out there with the intention of failing, not succeeding.

Edit: another thing, unlike guys, girls flirt for the sake of flirting.

So even if she has no interest in you, she may still decide to flirt.

2017-11-26T15:51:54+00:00

Time is not a measurement of skill.

You say 3 years, but said you never approach, so reality is you have probably less then 30days of actually game skill. Which is why you still have AA.

2017-11-26T11:31:43+00:00

It think you should accept your feelings when you are around girls. Take a deep breath tell your self you feel nervous being with these girls. Then allow you self to have fun and be in the moment.

SIC_redditcruiser · 2017-11-26T16:42:04+00:00

Experience = confidence. So if you are nervous getting experience then tell your body you are excited when you are nervous, because your mind doesn't know the difference between excitement and nervousness. Also chew gum. This tells your body that you are eating and there's no need to be nervous because you are safe.

Mr_0range · 2017-11-26T17:13:05+00:00

I was the same way when I first started. In high school I was the shy guy that girls only saw as a friend. In college when I first started learning about this stuff, I was terrified of approaching girls. My best advice for you would be to start small. You have to build yourself up to approaching a woman.

Start by smiling at strangers you walk by. Then start saying, "Hello" or "Good morning." Then start small conversations with women with a goal of talking, not on seducing them. Go to the mall and ask about a product you're interested in. Just get them talking so you can start feeling comfortable with the idea of talking with women. Eventually with enough practice you can make approach. Good luck man.

photogenic_penis · 2017-11-26T23:07:40+00:00

There are a lot of guys that watch MMA, even watch martial arts videos, but have never trained. They aren't fighters or martial artists. They're fans.

Social skills need to be practiced. If you never get into conversations with strangers, you aren't going to be very good at holding a conversation. Go out and talk to people. Make a joke to the person in the supermarket line. Ask your waiter a question. You know... talk to people.

Look into their eyes, listen to what they say, stay centered, be normal, know when to smile and say bye. Be willing to have a few weird interactions. If you need to, read a few articles on how to make small talk. Watch Joe Rogan- that guy can talk to anyone.

I know it feels like a big deal to start talking to an attractive woman out of the blue- it feels like a big deal to me a lot of times, too. It really isn't. The prettiest girl is just a primate like me and you.

2017-11-27T17:42:01+00:00

If you have to almost approach a girl 1000 times just to actually approach one once, then that's what you need to do.

Repetition. Repetition. Repetition.

No one can stop the man who is willing to lose 1000 times to win once. No one.

Title	Talking to Girls in public - I am still anxious AF after 3 years
Author	yahoofrz
Upvotes	19
Comments	8
Date	November 26, 2017 5:41 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/7fkziz/talking_to_girls_in_public_i_am_still_anxious_af/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/talking-to-girls-in-public-i-am-still-anxious-af.1437470 https://theredarchive.com/post/1437470

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