There are two very common issues for Aspies when it comes to conversation.

Either they’re told they don’t say enough. Or they’re told they get on a topic and talk about it for waaaaay too long.

A simple approach to solving both these issues is: change the subject.

When you change the subject, you always have something new to talk about, which actually solves both problems.

If you always have something new to talk about, then you can minimize the issue of not saying enough. At the same time, if you always have something new to talk about, you can minimize the issue of endlessly talking about one topic.

In addition, changing the subject keeps things interesting for the woman.

But what do I change the subject to?

The answer is anything. ANYTHING. It doesn’t matter.

Now the biggest concern I hear with this is: What if it’s not a good topic? What if it’s not an interesting topic? What if it’s not the right topic?

Here’s the key: No “topic” is inherently “good, interesting or right.” What makes it good, interesting or right is your ability to talk about it (i.e. you know something about it therefore you can talk about it in an interesting way).

So, since Aspies generally like predictability and order, prepare in advance for a date.

Make a list of 15 things.

6 topics which are “small talk” topics - simple things that you know about, which don’t require either person to reveal anything too personal to the other.

6 topics which are “deeper” - slightly more involved things which may require either you or her to reveal more personal information to the other, such as interests and passions.

3 deep questions. These are questions that would get her to reveal personal information about her hopes, desires and dreams.

Have some interesting things to say about each topic.

Now you have 15 interesting things to discuss and a plan to change the subject regularly so the conversation doesn’t get stale.

Check out more articles on making conversation here.