Good first interaction, but no date (Need advices)

djdante · 2019-03-11T22:16:04+00:00

So, it doesn't sound like a great outcome for you here.

There are lots of women who are flirtatious by nature - one of my close friends is like this - She never does anything inappropriate, but she always gives men (myself included) this lingering eye contact that feels like it's screaming 'i like you'. And she has no clue she does it (some flirt with guys on purpose just for attention of course) - it's a habit she picked up that makes guys treat her better and she's trying to break it but doing anything different just feels weird to her.

So Back to your question - evidently she wasn't eager even if she was giving the signals - Consider friending her yourself? She likely has other cute female friends. It's an opportunity to expand your social network.

biological-NakSu · 2019-03-11T22:30:54+00:00

Mmmmm i can really help you with that because there could be a million reason why she told you so. But your story made me remember something a friend of mine told me once. She said that for her (but for most girls in general) is easier to get flirty and wild during parties because it doesn t have a lot of social tension behind it, and even if she ends up making out or fucking a guy who she doesn t particularly like or that someone would tease her for , she can always blame it on the alchol or other stuff; she also said that she would probabily turn a guy down if he asks her out after a party even if she liked him because planning a first date is more tedious and gives her anxiety over her looks, her preparation,stuff to talk about, embarassment of a first meet up... and a lot of stuff should perfectly allign to make her say yes. So eventually she told me that if i ever got "frisky" with a girl at a club, got her number and all, and wanted to have a date with her, i should firstly ask her out with some of our friends in common or other people we could bring, so that she wouldn t feel embarassed, anxious or have to be 100% focused on you all the time without having time to breathe or relax a bit. I dont know if this is the case, but it popped in my mind after i read your post

Not_My_Real_Acct_ · 2019-03-12T00:01:34+00:00

The thing that I used to do, was to 'put them on ice' for a while. Here's why this works:

Attractive women are nearly always in some kind of a relationship. It could be a full-on BF situation, it could be a FWB situation, it could be that she's chatting with someone and she hopes that it leads to more.

So if I attempt to get a date, and she politely turns me down, I just 'put her on ice' for a while. That might be three weeks, it might be three months.

75% of the time, they'll end up initiating an interaction with me. Could be via email, phone, text message, whatever. That situation is ideal; if they're reaching out to me, it's a sign of interest.

If they don't reach out to me, I will eventually reach out to them, but it's gonna be a while.

Between the day that I met my wife, and when we got married, was over 20+ years.

So you can do this routine for ages. If they're into you, it's not like they just forget about you.

Twenty years is a bit extreme, but you'd be amazed how long you can put people on ice. In another case, I met someone online and we didn't go on a date for three YEARS.

Last but not least, obviously you have to be doing this with dozens of people or it doesn't work at all. If you're putting all your energy into one person, putting them on ice doesn't work.

BlackPyro · 2019-03-12T09:07:28+00:00

I haven't seen anyone talk about the night of the interaction, so I'm going to ask about that as I believe that's where the root of the issue is. You said you had a good interaction, but you didn't escalate to physical contact of any sort as far as I know. I would have pushed the escalation as far as I could, and then when I knew that a SNL wasn't going to happen, settle for the instagram/number/snapchat. You missed the window of opportunity where she had you framed in her mind as the fun, exciting guy. Now that she has seen you in your moment of inaction and has transitioned back into a logical frame of mind, the good vibes she felt are going away. The whole "we could meet with friends" is the nail in the coffin in my opinion. Don't do that, because she's taking you out of the "potential mate" pool by not having a one-on-one meeting. I'd say drop her and go after over girls. If she comes back around, let her ask for the date, and I mean one-on-one date, no friends.

Title	Good first interaction, but no date (Need advices)
Author	SycarFC
Upvotes	3
Comments	9
Date	March 11, 2019 9:34 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/azz50z/good_first_interaction_but_no_date_need_advices/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/good-first-interaction-but-no-date-need-advices.1464167 https://theredarchive.com/post/1464167

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