Guys who aren’t very talkative, how do you do tinder/online dating?

quinnmcd · 2020-07-10T04:17:48+00:00

Relatedly, if you match with a girl early in the week (say, Sunday) and schedule a date that weekend, how much do you chat leading up to the date?

It varies from girl to girl. I've got dates after an hour of messaging and I've got dates after a month of texting. You definitely want to focus on the girls more eager to meet up and not the ones that are indecisive or just looking for attention. I'll break down my process in the simplest way.

Get their attention in the first message. No "hey beautiful" or "what's up" ask something about her pictures or her bio. If she has nothing in her profile then just make an assumption. "you look like you are artistic. Do you paint?" you just want something different than what everyone else is sending her and give her something to reply too.
Ask basic questions. Ask where she's from, what does she do for a living and if she's in school ask what's her major.
Ask what's she looking for. I love clarity and being on the same page with girls. Usually when I ask this if she's looking to just hook she'll let me know. Girls will tell you they are looking for friends or looking to date. It depends on what you're looking for if you should proceed. Don't force things or think you can change her plan if she's only looking for friends. Don't think you change her mind and make her want to date you.
Get her number. If the conversation is flowing well you want to get off the AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. Jump in front of the other guys and text her.
Flirt and making light conversations. You don't want to let her too much about yourself because you want to save that for the date. Don't text long stories or paragraphs keep it light and fun.
Find common interests. Ask about her favorite tv shows, what kind of music she likes. If you like the same thing let her know if you don't like the same thing tease her and make jokes. Don't act like you all the same things. My go conversation starters are: music, sports, and food.
Ask her on a date. From all the texting you should have a basic idea of her schedule. You should know what she likes to come up with a date that's you both will enjoy. Find a fun activity. I've been doing park dates. I grab us some carryout from a restaurant we've both never tried before. We sit on a blanket and just talk for a good hour. try to keep it short. If she has a good time she'll want to see you again.

After you ask her on a date it's a good sign if she's excited. You don't want an "I'll think about it" or "I'll let you know when I'm free" those are soft rejections. you probably asked too early or she's not interested enough. Buts are good though. "I'm not free this Friday BUT I will be free Sunday" when you ask you ask to be like "WE (important word) should go on a DATE (another important word you want to be clear on your intentions) at (place) and (time) on (day)" Make sure she knows it's a date and not a friendly meet up or just hanging out. Don't ask to hang out because she'll think you're just friends.

Don't waste time. it shouldn't take longer than 3 days to a week. If makes you wait longer than 2 weeks for a date then imo you should drop her. If a girl likes you or has interests she'll meet up when she has time. Girls that make you wait usually keep you around as the backup plan. After waiting 2 weeks or more I usually run into a girl that is more insecure or emotionally unavailable.

Don't be discouraged because most guys don't get a lot of dates with their matches. Out maybe 30 matches on bumble two months ago I met up with maybe 5 of them. I easily could have got more but would have wasted time on boring girls that I had little interest in. Enjoy yourself, dating shouldn't feel a chore or frustrate you. Focus on just trying to get to know awesome people and being open with new people.

Codeye65 · 2020-07-11T01:29:46+00:00

You - Hey how are you?

Her - Good

You - wanna have some intimate fun times?

Her - yeh sure.

You would be surprised how often that works that way.

NCreature · 2020-07-10T01:13:50+00:00

Doesn't Jeffy or Todd Valentine have a course on exactly this? I think its Jeffy.

Title	Guys who aren’t very talkative, how do you do tinder/online dating?
Author	Walripus
Upvotes	4
Comments	3
Date	July 10, 2020 1:07 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/hofi5b/guys_who_arent_very_talkative_how_do_you_do/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/guys-who-arent-very-talkative-how-do-you-do.1498471 https://theredarchive.com/post/1498471

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