Advice for a 20F who’s only had sex once and has vaginismus

new-crystal · 2020-08-22T19:18:04+00:00

I really relate to you. I have awful self esteem and am scared to let boys see me naked as well. I’m embarrassed because I’ve never even had sex, that’s how self conscious I am. I get upset and feel like I’m missing out when my friends in college just hook up casually or have sex with their boyfriends with no stress. I feel so behind and I don’t know how to get out of it. I would also like to hear if someone overcame this problem

PMmeSexyChickens · 2020-08-22T19:00:34+00:00

Have you been to the doctor for the vaginitis? There is meds and therapy for that

Bubble889 · 2020-08-22T20:14:05+00:00

Stop worrying so much. Yes seek medical attention if you continue to be concerned, but speaking for all guys this doesn’t matter. So this should be for your pleasure and not because you feel like some type of failure at sex. Intercourse isn’t the only way to have sex and you shouldn’t use intercourse as the way to be validated. Also your weight is fine and healthy. Guys like healthy girls. A stomach is normal. Don’t mess with it. Work on getting happier. Don’t worry about your friend’s sex life. Just because your friend hooked up with guys you are interested in doesn’t mean you can be interested in them.

Princessleiawastaken · 2020-08-23T01:28:57+00:00

I also have vaginismus and can’t get passed the dilators that are close to penis size. I’ve just done oral and fingering. I hope I can get better one day, but for now I’m able to enjoy other kinds of sex.

PeekAtTheBottomRight · 2020-08-23T03:19:38+00:00

You’re a very strong person. Believe me, there is a guy for every girl out there. Plenty. Just put yourself out there and you will find new people who are genuinely interested in you. Depending on the guy, your weight does not matter too much. Especially if you’re within a healthy BMI. Also, you don’t have to have vaginal sex to have a good time. Find help and work towards improving your vaginismus, but most guys won’t be pissed off at that. Make out, try new things, and be open to meeting new people on one of the many dating apps out there. You’ll get where you want to be. I know it.

belikemichellee · 2020-08-22T20:15:38+00:00

I would totally recommend you to find a good therapist, because what you need to do right here is to work on yourself, build your confidence and raise your self esteem. Remember that if you don't value yourself, no one else will. Positive thinking is good, but I don't think it's the way to go.. it wastes a lot of your mental energy on trying to stay positive while you're miserable. It's better to acknowledge your emotions and ask yourself why you are feeling this way. Also, you should look out for better friends, you need people that are encouraging you to grow and develop. You could start that by engaging in some hobbies, and by working on something larger than you, you will gain skills, people will notice that, but most importantly, you will feel better! Are you working out? Being active and doing sports does wonders for your confidence, and for the body as well! As for the vaginismus problem.. I think it is at least partly mental..so you should clearly solve the previous issues first! Also, I think it would be better for you to look for a long term relationship with a kind partner, who you will fully trust 😊. But as I said before, start by working on yourself, and feel comfortable to DM me! You can do it!

2020-08-22T18:56:48+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	Advice for a 20F who’s only had sex once and has vaginismus
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	7
Comments	12
Date	August 22, 2020 6:53 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ieo4q0/advice_for_a_20f_whos_only_had_sex_once_and_has/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/advice-for-a-20f-whos-only-had-sex-once-and-has.1500859 https://theredarchive.com/post/1500859

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