Texting with someone today and they brought up sex. Kinky unusual sex. Sounded like fun. I wanted to know what this person liked about what they were thinking about but felt a pitfall.

Could have just gone down the "Whats exciting about that?" path... but a lot of times people don't know why unconsciously they want kinky sex. The answer I feared and stayed away from was "I don't know." And they might not. But theres usually something deep behind kinky desires. What do you folks do when you want to know the why behind the why but don't want to crash into the "I don't know rocks." Those rocks are the death of mind blowing sex.