Can I get this girl who likes me to invite me to her parties and shit? I'm less interested in her and more interested in the social hook-up.

cvzfghj · 2015-07-22T05:35:51+00:00

create a linkedin profile. it should go something like this:

background summary:

as it currently stands, my personality on its own is not appealing enough for me to be invited to social functions where many of my peers congregate and interface with one another. unfortunately, without any means of access to "dinnerware" (wink wink), my ability to spin multiple plates is drastically reduced. if i lift and read the sidebar, but do not have a gaggle of hanger-ons to hear my amused mastery, am i still alpha? you understand my dilemma.

experience:

intern @ sorely lacking any & co., day of parturition—july 2015

skills:

a self-starter and team player devoid of charisma yet willing to make up for it via desperate and enthusiastic schmoozing. i am proficient in windows productivity programs and quickbooks. i am also able to seamlessly transition from casual mingling into beta orbiter sycophancy in order to secure important accounts such as HB6-8s, and the odd HB9, which will help raise our firm's prestige immensely. since my experience is limited, i am willing to accept an entry level or temp position. i am certain that the firm's corporate culture will allow my smv to flourish in a short amount of time. i look forward to the day when i am deemed worthy of being promoted from a cubicle to an actual desk with four legs.

now that you've completed your profile, send an e-vite to this girl so she can be added to your connections list. following the method which i have laid out here will demonstrate—with absolutely no room for ambiguity—that you wish to associate with her on a strictly professional level.

after receiving the invite and glancing curiously at your profile, the girl will see that you are in dire straits, seriously in need of human contact and free refills of natty light. any sexual interest she may have had for you will immediately wither away and be replaced by a disdainful yet charitable sympathy for your plight. the combination of pity and the nostalgic memory of her initial attraction to you will guarantee at least one casual invitation to an extremely large bumpin' party. she will then be able to fulfill her "obligation" to you by letting you ride on her coattails towards rockstar popularity while still being able to easily lose you amongst the crowd as soon as you enter the door, thereby avoiding any further interaction with you for the rest of the night.

it is now up to you to use this time judiciously and to the best of your advantage. achieve maximum efficiency in your networking by asking at least 50-60 practical strangers for their digits and/or facebook after you have exchanged the bare minimum of pleasantries/small-talk necessary to not make it awkward.

should the night be a success, you too, like the girl you don't really want to have sex with, will break out of the lonely confines of your chrysalis and emerge as a majestic alpha monarch butterfly.

good luck in your travels, my friend.

EllenJoyyy · 2015-07-22T04:47:46+00:00

Just relax lol. If you keep up this over thinking attitude she might lose the attraction.

Just say something like ay if any parties are coming up let me know.

Don't even worry about her being the key to you being invited to parties. Keep working on becoming a likeable person and somewhat of a social butterfly yourself and the invites will come. Don't waste too much time/energy on this girl just for that! :)

SkorchZang · 2015-07-22T18:01:06+00:00

I'd let her contact me (the "ping", whatever random bullshit she uses for the excuse), and then hit her with it in the face: "so when are you gonna invite me to one of your awesome parties?"

Just throw it out like that is if it was a challenge to her very femininity or at least hospitality.

It still "kinda" implies you're trying to get in her pants, but taking the roundabout route. But then again, you never said anything would happen, so... check your entitlement, girl.

RidleySmith · 2015-07-22T10:30:25+00:00

In business you'd say you'd want her as the equivalent of like a "referral partner" so you could follow similar strategies as that

Keep stringing her along, holding back your sex to get into the parties enough so that you can make friends with people at the parties who can get you invited. After about five parties, she might lose enthusiasm, but by then you'll have hopefully have networking with five partie's worth of people who could set you up after you discard her from your network.... Or alternatively just CALL her asking where she's going next, in like an assertive manner, so that she tells you anyway but doesn't feel comfortable about it... Lol

4benny2lava0 · 2015-07-22T08:47:52+00:00

Throw parties. I get invited to all the parties because I throw parties. My people throwing a particularly big party? I'm there the day before to help set up. There might be ten other people there more than likely more girls than guys.

You establish rapport and now they now when they throw a party they know you will be a great guest and your are responsible enough to help hold down the fort.

But lava I don't have (m)any friends or plates.

Invite people over. Call four acquaintances and have poker night, dinner and a movie, get drunk and play cards against humanity it doesn't have to be extravagant. I went to a walking dead party. We cooked a fancy ass dinner, then we planted our asses on the couch and watched this gay ass zombie show. Still had fun. Snuck out back with this couple to blaze a joint and I invited them to a party with my stoner friends. They return the favor by inviting me to their parties

Now you have bonded with a few people. They will start inviting you to their functions.

You have to prime the pump. Now maybe you cant throw parties where you are at. Hotel parties are cool. Maybe go out somewhere.

Also why are you so hung up on one girl? Girls parties are never as fun or wild as guy hosted parties.

Title	Can I get this girl who likes me to invite me to her parties and shit? I'm less interested in her and more interested in the social hook-up.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	7
Comments	6
Date	July 22, 2015 3:22 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3e5ls7/can_i_get_this_girl_who_likes_me_to_invite_me_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/can-i-get-this-girl-who-likes-me-to-invite-me-to.151454 https://theredarchive.com/post/151454

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