I have a curious dillema that I have not seen discussed. I'm in my late 40's btw. I get morning wood, no worries. However, occasionally I can't get hard without my wife participating. It's as if I'm depending on my wife to get hard. If she doesn't reciprocate, then my dick is just flaccid.

This is probably a validation seeking behavior, so what's the best way to address this? How do I stop needing validation? And what are some exercises that would help me get hard on demand. I feel like my issue is anxiety/mental and not physical.