Hey all - potential for a meetup is approaching and I have a couple of quick questions about kind of a peculiar situation. I've seen many posts about the debate between asking for IG vs Phone number and this is sort of along those lines.

Background: cute girl works at a restaurant I started going to infrequently a few months ago. We've had good interactions thus far. Holding eye contact, plenty of smiling/laughing during convos, pleasant and positive introduction etc. All positive things afaik.

Worth mentioning that I also work in customer facing food service so am fairly certain this was a bit beyond general cordialness to a customer.

We had a good introduction that while a bit gross, was still humorous: I went to their bathroom and literally could not access the toilet as someone had peed all over the middle of the floor.

I went back out and said "hey I'm sorry cause it's gross and I really hate to do this to you (she had approached me as I exited) but someone's peed all over the ground by the toilet" she started laughing with an eye roll kinda "oh god".

I shared a funny similar story, followed by "I really hate to interrupt your closing activities with someone else's inability to aim" (as she has been working on glasses behind the bar before the discovery) and she looked at me laughing again and said "that's super real of you" and I said "what's your name by the way? I'm [name]" and she said "oh I'm [name] nice to meet you!" And extended her hand to shake mine (which I had not done, as we were kind of farther apart at the bathroom).

To get to present day, a few days ago I went in to pick up food and said hello to her, and she told me the restaurant was closing in less than a month. I immediately make the executive decision that I will not be exiting without asking for her number.

So we talk about the circumstances of the closing with another couple employees for about 20 minutes, and then I talked directly with her about her career, what she was studying, what she was gonna do after it closes etc. as I'm starting to leave she's over by a table finishing up some silverware and I say "hey, I don't want to lose contact - can I get your number?" Her response was "oh I don't give out my number, do you have IG?"

I did not have IG. I'm not a big fan of zuck products so I said "oh, no! I'm not big on social media, FB and all that..." And she said "yeah but it's great for connecting with people! - you make one and come back here and I'll give you mine"

I'm in a relationship already, and it is open to women as my partner is bisexual. She is my world, and I'm having a real kick meeting new people and wondering whether it's possible to hook them up with her 😂.

That being said, we are at a place where it's very low pressure on us when it comes to the dating environment. We are very happy with each other, very sexually explorative, and we want to share that with someone else. If they're not interested, no worries, we are happy to just make new friends if thats all it comes to!

We are simply looking to expand social circles, and get a better read on people when first getting to know them. As the search for thirds in our relationship has happened in the recent year, I have been cleaning quite a bit of rust off the dating ability and am still in the process. I'm appreciative of all your advice!

Also, I now have an IG and will be going back on Friday.

Question 1: in this context, do you think her saying no to the number but asking for me to make an IG so she could give me hers is a good sign, or an extended form of "letting me down easy" that the attraction isn't really there? I feel like me not having an IG was already an easy out, no? If she is attracted, I have literally zero experience with IG, what's the best way to escalate?

Question 2: to that end, if I go in and the vibe doesn't feel right, or feels too casual when she gives the IG, is it worth my time and/or appropriate to say something along the lines of "look I'm not trying to waste anyone's time - we're both adults and it's been long enough we've known each other to determine if there's attraction and interest in pursuing more. I think you're super cute and have enjoyed all of our conversations so far and would love to get to know you better, but if the feeling is not mutual or it's not something you're looking for, no worries - take it as a compliment, and I'll see you around!"