Since a young age, I was exposed to some social standards orientated towards women. Here in Russia, we have very old proverb "Бабий век - 40 лет" (translation: woman's century only 40 years). In short it is about the life span of women's value like fertility, youth, health, strength, and then about menopause and everything following like infertily, health issues, weakness, loss of femenity, becoming a grandmother at that age and etc. We have similar ideologies about traditional values in Russia. I was told from a young age that women should start a family life at the youngest age possible due to biological clock and because this is that "all 'NORMAL' women want, duh? A high-quality feminine woman is a woman of God, wants nothing but to be a housewife with a big family, and submissive to her husband. " Well, that eventually made me feel like a complete weirdo because these wishes of every "normal" woman never came to me naturally. Also, I noticed in HS that no matter how nice of a person you are(hi to all nice guys and femcels), guys are not interested unless you are a pretty. Obviously I bloomed and became pretty later, but that didn't help my mental state because of the feeling that my real value as a person would be multiplied by 0, if I'm not young, beutiful and fertile. So I secretly wish till this day to perish young before I turn 25 when it's already the time to accomplish all the above. I feel myself like some sort of defective woman at 24, disgusting old failure, not pure as a girl, my beauty will vanish soon with my eggs lmao. So yeah, RP can be destructive and lead to self-sabotage.