Struggling to Find New Topics After 2 Years of Talking, Need Advice!

dontsleepnerdz · 2025-01-21T05:52:46+00:00

My friend who was in a 3+ year LTR would always try brand new activities, like they would get into sculpting, or play a new board game with people, etc i think you need to explore new things which become fodder for chat

Amaran345 · 2025-01-21T13:38:35+00:00

If the relationship needs "new topics" all the time to keep the spark alive, then it's an insecure attachment because a secure relationship doesn't need that, it just needs closeness and intimacy, two quiet people that are happy with each other is secure, with no fear that the relationship will fail because they are not constantly talking about new things

HomelessMilkman · 2025-01-21T17:07:29+00:00

Topics aren't interesting, you add the energy and enthusiasm that makes it interesting.

Trying 'too hard' is having a 'logical and thought provoking' topic which you've spent time crafting and deliver it without any of that 'juice'. You've missed the point. People watch stupid shit on their phones, not read deep and insightful philosphy; they want the presentation.

Your energy and enthusiasm is 'you', your inflection, your unique delivery, your essense, that's what 'you' bring. Worrying about 'topics' is worrying about things that aren't 'you', it's hoping that the content itself will spur some energy and enthusiasm when you can just offer that yourself beforehand.

You just have to 'share'. You feel good and share that. Content is important because it's a vessel for the energy and enthusiasm you can deliver, but the actual content is 'neutral' until you influence the person to like or dislike it based on how you're leading. You say it dry and monotone, yawn. You say it like the earth just exploded, we're pumped, we're awake, we're locked in. Ultimately, it's just a case of enjoying expressing yourself, just because; enjoying life, having energy to chant 'Taco time' as you conduct your 'food ritual'. It's not sophisticated, just add a little bit extra on top, channel some more energy and passion into whatever.

norwegiandoggo · 2025-01-21T06:08:35+00:00

Focus on their current goals and struggles.

Whatever you have talked about in the past gives a big picture overview of who they are and what they like and so on. But what about their current struggles and goals? Those things always change. Is she down with a cold? Ask her how it's going, how it's changing, what you can do to help. If she studying? Ask her to tell you about her day as a student. Talk about her biggest challenge lately and how she's overcoming it. Does she want to buy new shoes? Ask her what goes into her criteria. Essentially, focus more on current challenges and aspirations.

Consume new content to talk about.

Always be learning new things by reading books, watching videos etc. Whenever you learn something interesting, feel free to share it. I've had so many talks with my GF about things I learned today.

Do something new together.

Instead of just talking, do an activity together. You can talk about the activity.

Be social with other people.

When you visit friends or family - and come back - you will typically have lots to talk about in terms of what they're doing, their struggles, joys etc. You can also do social things together with other people.

Share from your own struggle / journey.

Talk about what is currently happening for you emotionally, and what issues you're trying to adress to improve your own life. Are you exercising? Talk about that and how things are improving..again, this is focusing more on the new things that are happening currently. Rather than past things you have already talked about.

RevolutionaryFuel475 · 2025-01-21T10:03:35+00:00

Travel or make travel plans, discuss art and culture.

mdeeebeee-101 · 2025-01-21T10:10:20+00:00

Are you sexual with her at this stage ? If not, most likely friendzoned.

Dandys3107 · 2025-01-21T11:16:58+00:00

It's very natural to run out of topics if you already have elaborated about everything couple of times. If you want to still deepen your connection you should rather turn to going through some important or unique situations together. Or maybe you relation simply run through expiry date and there is really no point in forcing things and keeping it artificially alive and instead you should rather put your focus and efforts in different direction?

Title	Struggling to Find New Topics After 2 Years of Talking, Need Advice!
Author	Ok-Percentage20
Upvotes	3
Comments	14
Date	January 21, 2025 5:37 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1i6bouy/struggling_to_find_new_topics_after_2_years_of/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/struggling-to-find-new-topics-after-2-years-of.1541754 https://theredarchive.com/post/1541754

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