Tips for brown south asian man living in Europe?

norwegiandoggo · 2025-05-30T06:33:47+00:00

The style in Asia is quite reserved and passive compared to Europe.

To adjust you can definitely be a bit more up front with your intentions. Instead of asking her to hang out, ask if she wants to do a coffee date.

As for your conversational style; You're doing a few mistakes.

You're trying to gather personal information about her early on. This can seem like an invasion of privacy. Start out by talking about something else that has nothing to do with her personal data.
You're using too many full-switch questions. Every question you ask is beginning a new topic. Instead, once you begin talking about a topic and she answers you should stay with that topic a bit longer and ask multiple follow-up questions to whatever she is answering.
Your questions are a bit boring and standard. Can you come up with something more unusual that stands out?
Don't just ask questions. Also make sure to add statements to your conversation. Information should flow both ways equally.
Instead of just exchanging normal information like it's a work meeting - try to bring up topics that would spark emotion. Or spark emotion by joking or being playful. You want to create some emotional highs.

HistorianOk2573 · 2025-05-30T03:19:44+00:00

I found out the girls starts looking around mid convo or just leaves.

This happens when they get bored, which tells me you are having platonic and safe bland conversations but I'll keep on reading...

- Convos that I have almost flow well like " where are you from / I like your city- country / what's your hobby / oh you are very interesting, I like that " these are my first few lines

As i predicted your conversations are the most generic, safe, neutral and bland you could have. No risks, no tension, no challange, no mystery, no anticipation, no curiosity at all, and very little personality displayed... Just a conversations about facts about each other,... Not exactly thrilling stuff.

Being bland and safe will bore women. You need an edge, soemthing that makes women think thigns like:

"Holy shit, did he just say that? How dare he." "Wow, that's a bold thing to say", "oh my god he is so shameless", "jeez this guy has no filter", "he literally doesn't give a fuck", "he is so real",...

You think a conversation like "so i was born in south asia, and i study politicla science, and i really like to spend my free time playing ping pong and rock climbing.." is gonna make those women think any of thsoe things i metnioned before? Obviously not..

Same goes for when she says stuff about herself, and all you have to say is validation "oh mhow interesting, oh wow impressive..." you are not creating any excitement, or showing any persnality because literally your conversation sounds exactly teh same as every other guy, you put an ai detector and would probably come with similar conversation. Safe and predictable.

- but I do not know how to convince her to go on a date with me someday

It's not about convicing girls. It's not about impressing them, or proving your worth so that a girl gives you a date as a reward... It's about making them feel excitement, curiosity, adrenaline, desire, surprise, tension, suspense, anticipation, euphoria, laughter, and making them feel understood.

- Is it even ok to let her know that if we hangout its gonna be date next time

That's a very clunky way to say it, not very smooth. She should know from the tone of your voice and your body language and your words that you are hitting on her directly from the get go, that you are sexually attracted and interested in her. You should not have to clarify that you are thinking of a hangout as a date. She should feel lie you are containing yourself from almost "devouring" her sexually...

You covey that by having a cocky smile, biting your lips suggestively in a subtle way, looking at her lips in a kinda obvious way but not explaining to her why you are doing, so that she feels mystery about your next move. That's masculine, that's seductive,...

You tease, you poke fun at them, your povoke them, you accuse them of things, you mess with them like a bratty little sister that you don't take seriously and want to get a little bit mad just for fun, you make fun of them lightheartedly, you push them away in lighthearted ways before pulling them back in when the tension is high.

You don't respond with logic or objectivity to women's questions as that's predictable and neutraizes tension. You respond with subjectivity, exagerations, provocations, and an "i don't give a fuck how you take my answer" vibe.

- If she asks: "Are you always like this with girls?"

you don't say "~~no, only the ones i like~~"

instead you say: "Worse. You’re getting the polite version... for now.”

- If she says: "DId you just stare at my butt?

You don't say "~~i didn't mean to~~" or deny it.

Instead you say *"*you call that, a butt?"

When your vibe says “I’m not here to convince you, I’m here to enjoy myself by making the atmosphere playful and tense" that's when you begin to seduce women, instead of being boring.

BostonHusky24 · 2025-05-30T03:21:39+00:00

There’s nothing wrong in being virgin. You are feeling nervous around women and they can sense it instantly killing the attraction and curiosity they had for you. Don’t provide straight one word answers - gets boring

If she leaves mid convo means that you both don’t share same thought process. Its like I am automatically friends with some people but not with others. We have common life patterns maybe same goals same values etc. what you find fun in they may not enjoy those things the same way.. so there’s the disconnect.. and conversation gets boring.

You should learn when a conversation is going to get boring and take an early exit before she starts looking around and not at all a bad thing because remember that you entered in the conversation with the aim of having fun and not getting any “result” and if you were there for result then you will act desperate or you gotta practice so much that even you’re desperate from inside but you appear so chill and relaxes and happy and high value.

And stop comparing from other brown men. Some are having fun some not despite race or nationality.

FactCheckYou · 2025-05-30T14:28:50+00:00

you might enjoy Master of None (2015-2021), season 2 specifically

POSITIVEBEACON · 2025-06-03T12:24:11+00:00

I’m a 19M Indian student will be moving to Germany soon too. Why do you struggle more there ? ??

Title	Tips for brown south asian man living in Europe?
Author	unga_bunga520
Upvotes	2
Comments	7
Date	May 30, 2025 1:40 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1kys66q/tips_for_brown_south_asian_man_living_in_europe/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/tips-for-brown-south-asian-man-living-in-europe.1553448 https://theredarchive.com/post/1553448

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