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Bi-curious, need advice.

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August 13, 2015
8 upvotes

Hello everyone. I'm a 21 y.o. male, and I'm Bi-curious. I have a girlfriend, and everyone I know has no idea I have these inclinations. I don't want this to sound like a coming out story so I'll try and be as straight to the point as possible.

For starters I'm adamant about maintaining my attraction to men a secret, for reasons I'm sure many of you understand. In my case It's purely physical, I have no romantic interest in another man. That said, I'm too concerned about STDs to engage in promiscuous/casual activities with random men. (Or women for that matter.)

I feel trapped in a way, having these urges. Just wondering if anyone has some advice to give me.


Post Information
Title Bi-curious, need advice.
Author altrpthrowaway
Upvotes 8
Comments 5
Date 13 August 2015 07:25 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit altTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/163371
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/altTRP/comments/3gvvwn/bicurious_need_advice/
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Comments

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

I'm bisexual. I have always been bisexual; I came out of the factory that way. I first noticed another boy sexually when I was 13(?). But I grew up in the 80s, where there was a lot of stigma attached to same-sex action. We are now in the 21st century, where there's waaaay less of that stigma.

Anyway, spent my 20s chasing pussy (because I'm more attracted to women), got married at 30, had a midlife crisis and/also realized "Oh my god, I'm 39, and I haven't had sex with a man yet!" It was always something that was on my "to do" list, but I never got around to it. So I talked to my wife about it, and she was "fine", and I went ahead and did it, and the sex was fine. Not mind-blowing, but fine.

Later, we got divorced, for a multitude of reasons, but "me having sex with a man" may have been one of them.

Since the divorce, I've been banging transgender girls, which for a bisexual guy... well, they truly are nature's most perfect creatures.

You're 21. You have a girlfriend. Probably not going to marry her, though (because you're 21), and at some point you guys will part ways. You are currently in a more-or-less committed relationship, though, and to cheat on her with a guy would damage your integrity.

There's probably an 80% chance that if you had the "I think I might be bisexual" talk with her, she'd break up with you anyway. So here are your options: 1) Have "the talk". See what she says. Are you OK being outed to all of your mutual friends? Because that's very possible. 2) Cheat with men behind her back. Tacky, and eventually you'll get caught, then outed. 3) Watch gay/bi porn. You'll eventually get caught, then possibly outed. 4) Wait until you break up, then bang a few dudes. Outlook unclear, but probably fine. 5) Deny yourself the experience until you're 39, then freak out about it. Not recommended.

Pick one, and get on with your life. PM me if you have any ???s.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Are you OK being outed to all of your mutual friends? Because that's very possible.

In my experience with women, it's 100% likely that she will tell all her friends. Not sayin' just sayin'.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep. They'll know everything.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

If you find hooking up to be too risky there's always porn. It's possible to get off/have good "sex"/release by yourself

[–]ObservantOmega0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's not the best choice, but unless you live in a large city there's always risk involved if you want to keep it under wraps.



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