666,886 posts

What's your relationship style/pattern?

by should_ | April 30, 2016 | altTRP

7 upvotes

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Let's take a non-judgmental look at our minds, our perspectives.

Let's behave like our 13 year old selves when we were on Livejournal, or...god forbid...the great Xanga.

This survey doesn't end with "You are a ______!" and there are no traps; I'm just curious how you, the AltTRP crowd, will answer, individually. No wrong answers; don't even be RP with this. (Not yet, anyway.)

I wrote this out of curiosity and to glean some self-perspective by seeing how others answer.

If you want something more substantive as to what prompted me, I guess I'm interested in how TRP is very "Be your own guy, you don't need an LTR," but, how by alienating yourself in that way, it can also cause one to look down at any kind of LTR, seeing it as a male defeat, instead of something else it could be, like mirroring, self-discovery through an other, etc. But this quiz is very open-ended and who knows what side of the rainbow you'll come out of after doing it.

Don't worry about sounding corny, basic, a chump, That Guy, or even blue pill. Feel free to say things like "I just haven't met the right person" and other things that TRP analysis would point and say "bruh, let me tell you what's really happening" and call you out on. Speak from the heart and we can be analytical after.......or not! Call yourself out after if it makes you feel better.

This is the silly-putty of our subconscious, elicited with a narcissist-y fun tween style quiz; we can see where we're at by looking at our answers without judgment. Again, I didn't think of what you really are after each question; I just wrote them.

Masculinity is king, but it's a diary slumber party tonight, grrlz.

Answers like this are no fun: 1b 2a 3c

Answers like this are better: (copy the whole thing into a comment box and delete as needed. type too.)

it's for you, not other peeps here.

I recommend thinking of the answer before looking at example options. Those are there to guide you if you go blank.

0. You are a...

x) (gay man, lesbian, ftm straight, mtf gay, computer nerd with a penis, free spirit but I charge for tricks, etc)

1. What's your relationship style?

a) LTR or bust.

b) Constantly in one LTR after another / Been in one LTR a long time

c) Consistently seeing the same guys who fly in and are here for a little while for weekends/vacation/business / Short term relationships

d) Bang and goodbye, always

e) other: ________ (for example "well it was LTRs. but I broke up and sexing mostly")

2. Do you think there's a reason your relationship style is like that?

a) it's my personality and it's what happens

b) it's how I want it; I could have it differently if I wanted to

c) my SMV is too low, that's why it's like that

d) my SMV is so high, that's why it's like that

e) recent event, it being _____________

f) my job

g) when I was a kid, __________, and I think that caused that, or something I don't remember and repress

h) ________________________________

3. If your relationship style could be different, would you have it be different? perhaps in a certain way?

a) yes, I'm not happy with how it is. you, see _____. (e.g., I want more sex, I want to be a master with guys, I want my LTRs to last longer, I want my boyfriend to respect me, I want to be someone's bitch instead of the man, I wanna be the man instead of the girl in the exchange/relationship, I want to move on and not be the one moved on from)

b) I could technically change, I have the option, but I wouldn't be feeling it by switching it up. I'm fine the way situations turn up with different guys I see. I mean, I could __, but, _. (e.g., I could commit to a guy I'm sleeping with, but it would not be fun or exciting to me; I could just have short term relationships, but I prefer LTRs)

c) I could change it, and hey, I just might try it! Here I go, bitches!

d) ______________________________________________

4. What is one thing (or a few things) that you WANT to be different about your relationships?

a) my physique; I'm ___ and I wanna be _. this would help me, you see, because _.

b) my guys' physiques; they're usually ____ but I want them to be ____.

c) I wish I fell in love easier

d) I wish I fell in love rarely / never did

e) I want my LTRs/flings to last longer

f) I wanna be less jealous

g) I wish I was white(r)

h) _________________________

i) _________________________________________________________

5. What best describes how you see guys and the relationship world? (Again, don't pick the RIGHT answer; pick the answer that best RESONATES with you, even if you 'know it's wrong.')

a) It's a world of (in this case) men competing for each other for the best man they can get. You're either up high or down low. Fatties don't bang charismatic athletes. The best rise and the weak fall. If you're not dating hot enough guys and you want to, make something of yourself. It's not a constant fight, but it is what it is.

b) I like spending time with someone who's fun and who's there chilling with me while I do laundry, see friends, watch movies, and chill.

c) I like spending time with someone who's fun and who's there chilling with me while I be an amazing badass at the club on the dance flo' and in my ambient. I am a huge badass by the way.

d) I don't even think about this shit.

6. What do you think most strongly affects an lgbt's relationship/sexual/mating patterns/habits?

a) Their first romantic/sexual experience in the lgbt world

b) How handsome/hot/beautiful/ugly they are

c) Their traumas/personalities; high school; how they see the world

7. How might your parents describe you? How does a stranger see you on the train? How do your friends see you? How do the last three people you've slept with see you? How would someone looking for a boy to fap to on the internet describe you? How would you describe yourself? (complete sentences = better)

x) ____________. ________. ______. _, ____, _. ________. __________________________________.

8. Wanna say anything else? Something not covered, something you wish was here, a critique of this format/approach, something you weren't able to say.

a) Listen mang, ____________________

This part is a you-are-this. I'll tell you what it is when you post and what it means for you. You'll be very happy you did it; I promise.

I) Describe your favorite color in three words.

II) Describe your favorite animal in three words.

Love you guys.


Post Information
Title What's your relationship style/pattern?
Author should_
Upvotes 7
Comments 7
Date 30 April 2016 02:17 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit altTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/163389
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/altTRP/comments/4h2qb5/whats_your_relationship_stylepattern/
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[–]should_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

0. You are a...

x) gay man

1. What's your relationship style?

Consistently seeing the same guys who fly in and are here for a little while for weekends/vacation/business / Short term relationships. Bang and goodbye, always. Haven't been official with someone in nine years but cute, handsome guys are interested in me, and I have sex with them or 'hang out' with them. I don't think I do it for the attention; I think I'm genuinely disinterested in being needed and like spending time by myself. Being around others all the time isn't a requirement though I do like going out and being the center of attention or just having a great, memorable time in an explosive way with others occasionally.

2. Do you think there's a reason your relationship style is like that?

I grew up since I was little being very hard on myself, anxious, and heady, with a love of being funny and clever and seen as skillful and fun and lovable. I was very shaken internally but a goofball on the outside, and technically had a lot of friends but never felt like I did.

Today, I like having sex with guys with fantastic physiques and am often picky of how masculine they are, and think "hey, maybe I should actually have a boyfriend" when I see others with them, or I remember that the whole point of life for some is that ecstatic being with a guy who gets you, enjoys spending time with you, and who you feel completes you. I think I'm missing out by not having those experiences more often, but where is that guy?

3. If your relationship style could be different, would you have it be different? perhaps in a certain way?

There are guys who I like hanging out with who are thirsty for moving up the levels with me, but if I decided to be boyfriends with one of them I would be deeply upset. I just wouldn't want to introduce them to my parents or any of that, or even have sex with them much. After seeing their naked bodies again, and the idea he's got no one else really on his waiting list, would make me disgusted with him. I also am repelled when guys more bottom-y than me show thirst to me in any way, but this is a feeling I have deep down that I don't think I openly show or that affects my actions too much in the moment. (Maybe the parent thing is seeing too far in the future and I should just let shit unfold, and throw a bone to an opportunity that looks just ok but could be better...)

I think I just need to keep improving my physique, masculinity, and move up in leagues, and I might be happier. I also need to be someone who actually enjoys spending time with people a lot of the time and regularly, and not just sometimes. I have something of a social life and I'm consistently seeing people but my shut-in side is real, even if I don't have the stereotypical body type associated with it.

I think I want to be super masc and tap into that energy so fully that I'm a beast among mere mortals. But maybe I should just enjoy boys and my time and the present and getting along with a cute guy who likes visiting me regularly, and hopefully I can tolerate it if he isn't a rippled god.

4. What is one thing (or a few things) that you WANT to be different about your relationships?

I want to experience being an average guy who has relationships because it feels right and it just happens to him, and also experience being an alpha douche who is the inseminator because masc. I'm the target of a lot of blond smooth cute bottom (tall?) types, so they must see something dominant about my dark haired and surprisingly-more-masc-than-them self.

5. What best describes how you see guys and the relationship world? (Again, don't pick the RIGHT answer; pick the answer that best RESONATES with you, even if you 'know it's wrong.')

Mostly me measuring myself against a standard. Lightly badgering myself with questions like: How come everyone else has had a relationship more recently than me?

6. What do you think most strongly affects an lgbt's relationship/sexual/mating patterns/habits?

Their traumas/personalities; relationship with parents; peer influences (maybe especially close gay friends, and other close friends).

7. How might your parents describe you? How does a stranger see you on the train? How do your friends see you? How do the last three people you've slept with see you? How would someone looking for a boy to fap to on the internet describe you? How would you describe yourself? (complete sentences = better)

Parents see me as: smart, thoughtful, sensitive, handsome, determined, kind

Stranger sees me as: I see someone with a fairly good looking face, an inherited figure that works and could use more, and clothes that are fine but not impressive and probably not updated often. Aaaand he just talked to himself.

Friends see me as: creative, funny, friendly

Last three people who sexed: cute guy who I enjoyed playing dad-son with in bed; boy I like seeing and fucking and kissing when I'm visiting for doctor-y business trips; a sucker who fell for show biz promises I made.

Fappenator: good face but needs more muscle definition and more masculine expressions, nice ass tho

8. Wanna say anything else? Something not covered, something you wish was here, a critique of this format/approach, something you weren't able to say.

Maybe being with a sweetheart since high school is nice; someone who you grew up with and bonded with you through similar struggles and times. So...a common identity? We are really just finding ourselves with relationships, aren't we? Or maybe not; for most people it's not a quest; it just feels right.

This part is a you-are-this. I'll tell you what it is when you post and what it means for you. You'll be very happy you did it; I promise.

I) Describe your favorite color in three words. mysterious, profound, spiritual

II) Describe your favorite animal in three words. needy, cute, snuggly/cuddly

[–]AceofRains0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

  1. Gay man

  2. Relationship Style Have always been single. I understand how promiscuous gay men are. In that I would prefer an LTR, but I'd rather keep the relationship safe, open, and honest. I trust no one but myself. Nobody has shown me reason to place trust.

  3. The reason it's like that I wasted a lot of time thinking I liked girls but viciously fapping to gay porn every night and not working on my self value. I didn't make an opportunity to experience a relationship. Even when some girls offered themselves to me, oneitis brought me back to the same silly hoe. I meshed the redpill experience I had with my coming of age and out of the closet all rolled into one big cluster-fuck. Everywhere I go, I am objectively seen as the brilliant young man I am, but I will never be loved for it- only really by declined older men who see the value in my potential. In that, I don't expect another man's commitment- especially if it's masc4masc which is what I desire. The men I have dated treated me like a joke, most of the time the excuse being I'm too young, even though they all conceded me to be far more mature than even themselves. Another role in it is being ever so slightly overweight. I'm fat enough to be rejected, but fit enough for it to "not be an issue." I never meet people who share this body type everyone is either a narrow twink, jacked, or morbidly obese. If I do find someone of my variety they are already taken, or closeted- and I don't do pussies who can't be open about who they are- not anymore, even if it's to save face.

  4. Would I change anything? Not at all. I'm happy this is who I became. I'm hot. Even though I'm not at the pinnacle of my sexual value, I'm getting my beach bod for this summer and by the time I'm 30 I will be a nicely tanned and toned salt and pepper stud- irresistible. I already have grey hair in the right places so I know I'm about to look like Mr. Fantastic. At that point, age will no longer be an excuse to not date or fuck me.

  5. What do you want to be different about relationship? I want more intimacy. I don't know if that's something that is simply achieved with the right person, or if people fail to be intimate due to their obsession with porn, or even my lack of higher sexual value. Maybe it's a combination of all of it.

  6. How do I view the relationship world? Gay couples tend to start looking like twins. It makes sense considering the term "Jealusty". I think a lot of gay guys fall for the heteronormative relationship model and fall flat on thier asses every time. They fail to realize that men want sex, but try to build this façade of commitment. When people fail to account for the fundamental differences in gender and power, I have a very "I told you so, laugh about it to my self." I enjoy chatting with couples and DL married men, but it often comes back to remind me that I'm just a lonely old hound dog but because I embrace my masculine virtues I physically can't shed a tear about it anymore even if I tried.

  7. What affects gay mating patterns? Well it could be a number of things. I recently broke the silence with the man who took my virginity. I ghosted him, but actually came back to thank him. My first time was passionate and comfortable. Do I wish I got to fuck a porn star my first time like some people...? Fuck, yes it do. But I remembered it worse than it was, and despite all the men I've fucked, none of it was special like that- and it's became what I crave. Besides that, I was reading some of Ayn Rands views on male sexuality. While I'm lazy to go back and link it, I basically agree that my desire in a partner rests with the value I have for my self. If I settle with another man, we will be hot shit together. I have that much value for myself, and refuse to settle for lower than that.

  8. How does the world view you? My parents may describe me as the son they are more proud of- a title easily earned. My brother is a fuck up and a klutz, and self righteous about it too. A train passenger would note that I am a good conversationalist but know when I had enough to talk about. People enjoy my company- and always register me as an intellectual within the first 5 seconds. My friends call me everyone's best friend. I don't turn my back on anyone, lest I get stabbed. The past 3 people I've slept with I didn't get to know. Maybe this one kid we clicked really well. He was DL with a gf, but I felt so bad because I couldn't cum. It was then I decided to start nofap. Someone on the internet might say something like "Hey, hot pics man. You have beautiful eyes. You're so sexy. Where are you from? What are you mixed with?" I am the hero of my story- that's the best way I could put it. My name literally translates to "Rugged hero of fair hair." I have an unbreakable will and a heart of gold.

  9. Comments Listen mang, I'll be honest. lately I have been questioning my sexuality. But I know I've always been attracted to men even before I was conscious of it. I never brought my self to try with a women since oneitis clouded my judgement. My mom once asked me why would anyone choose this it sounds so harsh, to which I replied "exactly." I know that being gay will only be a really lonely path, and I don't expect another man to walk with me. I just have no interest in pursuing women- especially after ingesting TRP. After finding TRP it's safe to say I could get a girl with relative ease. I know what makes them tick, I know how to make the ticking stop and make the tingles begin. My mom wants me to give her a grandchild and I am to oblige. She'd spoil them rotten, but I couldn't have it any other way, because I want my child to have more than what I had growing up. If it's a boy, I want to teach him the things that I didn't have my father around to teach me. If it's a girl, I want to be that father who protects her virtue and teach her to value her self and her hooha. I can't say I'd want to be with the mother of my child though, but I think I could find someone who I'd be happy to call my baby mama. But I'm not sure if I can really do that. She'd just settle with her beta bux or Chad if she's hot. And the child would be less and less mine as the years go by. How I do long to be a salt and pepper daddy though...

  10. Bloody, Fast, Revolutionary Winter, Fierce, Striped

[–]should_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

PMing you meaning of color/animal adjective choices

[–]theRedPikachu0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

0) My sex is male, but I don't feel very masculine at all and I never really developed a gender identity. I'm culturally male, and I'm less female than male psychologically. I've thought of the possibilty that I might be partially cisgendered and partially agendered, if that makes any sense. Whenever I try to say to myself "I'm a man" or "I'm a woman" or "I'm transgender" it doesn't feel right and it doesn't fit and it feels kind of hollow and fake. And yet I know that I do still have at least some gender-ish tendencies.

I'm just barely attracted to women at all and I have a much stronger preference for men.

1) A

2) H-it’s a combination of A B and C. Partially is that I don’t see the value in flings or one night stands, i wouldn’t want to make myself too physically or emotionally vulnerable to someone I don’t trust enough. Also my SMV is pretty low on average. I think there are some outliers, but they’re very rare.

3) D I don’t think so. Not unless flings and one night stands are necessary in order to make an LTR

4) H Actually having one. All of my familial relationships are kinda one-sided considering that I friend-zoned my mother and my sisters. And as for romantic or sexual relationshiops, I've never been in one of those either.

5) Kind-of A, but a little more cynical than that

6) C

7)

How my mother sees me: Smart, motivated, compassionate, has Asperger's syndrome

How my friends see me: smart, kinda annoying sometimes, funny (at least when I’m not trying too hard), openminded/accepting (in regards to people), closedminded/ignorant/oblivious (about other people’s opinions and perspectives), worries too much, overly skeptical

How a stranger on the train sees me: they’re probably not paying attention. Anything I say will probably go over their head, and I probably often don’t seem interesting enough on first glance. I think, in general, I only start to seem interesting to people when I talk, and only if they can understand what I’m saying. I suspect that this is the reason why I almost always have to be the one approaching other people to possibly befriend them, rather than any of them approaching me.

How someone who was looking for a boy to fap to on the internet would describe me in order of most likely to least lkely:

A. No response. No one like me would even show up in their searches.

B. "What!? I thought he was in his forties!!"

C. Hair levels and distribution=semi to moderately sexy for an older man even though he's in his early twenties. Height=too short. Muscles=almost nonexistent. Facial expression/body language=not sufficiently confident/strong/powerful. This response would occur subconscously in probably about a second.

8) Nice, Simple, Bright and Fun, and because of that Seriously Underestimated and Annoying to other People

9) Can I pick a plant instead of an animal? No? Fine then: Smartest Fucking Bastards in the world (and still stupid.)

Also hi, I'm new here!

[–]should_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Welcome! Will PM with meaning of those last adjectives

[–]shinglefoot 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

  1. You are a...

x) Bi-sexual man

  1. What's your relationship style?

e) other: Infatuation after infatuation when I was 15-19, then the switch flipped and I fucked whoever I could whenever I wanted (boys, girls, trans...if my dick liked you, that was enough), then just got out of my first LTR (1 year) and realized why I didn't do them in the first place.

  1. Do you think there's a reason your relationship style is like that?

a) it's my personality and it's what happens

  1. If your relationship style could be different, would you have it be different? perhaps in a certain way?

d) Honestly? I'd be able to not have my bisexuality flip like a goddamn switch at the most inopportune times. Like, I'll fuck guys for a bit, find one who I want to fuck a bit more regularly, and then all I'll be able to think about is pussy. I'd like to be able to tell my dick "DOWN BOY, WE'RE ON THE COCK TRAIN FOR NOW, I'LL GET YOU PUSSY IN A WEEK OR SO."

  1. What is one thing (or a few things) that you WANT to be different about your relationships?

a) my physique; I'm in shape and I wanna be drool-worthy. this would help me, you see, because I shave my head, and it helps a ton if you're bald AND have a ripped bod.

  1. What best describes how you see guys and the relationship world? (Again, don't pick the RIGHT answer; pick the answer that best RESONATES with you, even if you 'know it's wrong.')

d) I don't even think about this shit.

  1. What do you think most strongly affects an lgbt's relationship/sexual/mating patterns/habits?

b) How handsome/hot/beautiful/ugly they are

  1. How might your parents describe you? How does a stranger see you on the train? How do your friends see you? How do the last three people you've slept with see you? How would someone looking for a boy to fap to on the internet describe you? How would you describe yourself? (complete sentences = better)

x) Charismatic but unfocused. Scowly bearded hipster. Like no one else they've ever met, conversationally, psychologically and relationship-wise; one-of-a-kind. The asshole who broke her heart, The guy who finally fucked her like a woman, The guy with the beautiful cock that he couldn't stop sucking. Bearded hipster with gorgeous cock. I'm overly-analytical in situations, but once my mind is made up there's no going back. I don't apologize for my sexuality, because it's so fucking fluid, and I've learned that my cock wants what my cock wants. I'm constantly trying to better myself, but sometimes I'm too lazy for my own good. I wish I was more consistent.

  1. Wanna say anything else? Something not covered, something you wish was here, a critique of this format/approach, something you weren't able to say.

a) Listen mang, I'm a weird case, I admit. I tend to want guys because of their bodies/cocks -- their faces/ages/etc might as well be all blurred out or paper bagged, and it varys from big daddy types to little twinks, but the one thing I love is a beautiful cock. Women, on the other hand? Trans or CIS, I find such a range of them attractive, that it's almost a problem.

This part is a you-are-this. I'll tell you what it is when you post and what it means for you. You'll be very happy you did it; I promise.

I) Describe your favorite color in three words. Blue before sunrise

II) Describe your favorite animal in three words. Sleek frolicking otter

[–]should_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nice, PMing now re: I) and II) and stuff



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