What is your experience dating two girls at the same time without them knowing about each other?

Mackland · 2017-06-14T13:29:26+00:00

Casually dating isn't that hard, if you've got your shit together. I've had several short term relationships that have overlapped each other at times. It's all about balance. Go into it with the mindset that when you're physically with one of them, it's all about her. (This applies to anything that you spend your time on/doing. Don't waste your most valuable resource with less than 100% effort.) Also, setting boundaries in your mind for how many times a week you see each other helps as well. My rule of thumb: I never give one woman more than 2 days of my week. The only person that I spend half of my week with/on or more, is myself. Benefits also include giving her a chance to miss you, time to continue being the man that she is attracted to, and keeps your social circle still intact.

When asked in the beginning if I'm seeing anyone, my answer is always "not exclusively." That puts it out there from the start that I'm casually dating and she knows that this won't get serious anytime soon (she's probably doing that same thing anyways). This prevents, as you call it, you from feeling like a scumbag. It's all about communication and being upfront with her. If you don't want to be monogamous, and she does, then let her know that you're on separate pages and move on. No need to waste anyone's time.

RedSkeller · 2017-06-14T03:17:27+00:00

Sort of, I've had it happen a bunch of times where there are three women - one finds out and while I don't owe them an explanation, it's a bit of a hit to both of our reputations. I think as long as you have sincere honest motives there is less shame but it's never great to find out you're not the only one, especially when you really have a good connection.

Terdmuffin · 2017-06-14T04:42:14+00:00

I mean they know I'm probably seeing other girls but I usually do my best to keep them from knowing who I'm seeing or when. It's pretty easy because I don't have any social media. Never felt like a scumbag. I don't lie, but I divulge very little info about what I'm doing if they inquire. "drinks with a friend or friends" is all I say if I'm with my guy friends or on a date. If they pry I just ignore it.

Alegretron · 2017-06-14T05:42:25+00:00

Everytime I start to feel bad about one of them catching feelings I simply distance myself from the girl who is getting clingy(total blackout and stonewall of all communication) and spend more time with the other girl. Never get emotional or too attached. They will definitely try to fag you up by talking baby talk or wanting to constantly show pda. Simply and without explanation go spend time with the other girl when you catch a whiff of that bullshit.

[deleted] · 2017-06-15T03:34:41+00:00

Like everything you need to be up front. If you are doing some sneaky shit of course it's gonna end up weird.

And honestly hiding and lying is way more effort than it's worth.

[deleted] · 2017-06-15T05:09:50+00:00

Is it really tough? Do you feel like a scumbag after a while?

No. No.

-drukpa-kunley- · 2017-06-14T06:10:59+00:00

Are you dating two girls at the same time? If not, then come back when you ARE dating two girls at the same time and ask the question again.

By the way, I AM dating two girls at the same time, and no I don't feel like a scumbag.

Title	What is your experience dating two girls at the same time without them knowing about each other?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	2
Comments	7
Date	June 14, 2017 2:14 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6h4luq/what_is_your_experience_dating_two_girls_at_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/what-is-your-experience-dating-two-girls-at-the.180610 https://theredarchive.com/post/180610

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