tl;dr: Self-aware Beta, don't know if I should trust my mates. Needs adivce on screening friends.

1st part backstory, 2nd part problem, 3rd part questions.

Hi, I'm pretty new to TRP. Been lurking TRP and other various Red Pill subreddits for 2-3 months now. I am 20 years old, and currently studying my third year of psychology at uni. I am the first son of a Strong Independant Woman (SIW), single mother. My mom is a 3rd wave femminist, and infact was an assertiveness trainer for women (very strong minded). My dad was a criminal, AF. Never served 'real' time due to being an outstanding Machiavellianist. Dad divorced my mom. Mom got depressed, I became an emotional sponge with BP upbringing. Had an abusive childminder, had facial vitaligo and was bullied in school. Been mostly beta through school up untill uni (due to lack of real world and sexual experience, had sex with 3 girls, lost my virginity in first year) and was diagnosed with anxiety and depression last year.

However because of my genes and family I have a strong character, strong morals; classic underdog. I have a good athletic build, good looking and confident. I am now on the path to becoming great. I worked out a bit when I was younger after being bullied, and rejoined the gym 2-3 months ago. I have also started mma this month. I am off anti-depressants and have my first appointment with my therapist on Monday.

I was always getting AMOG'd and shit tested by guys I became friends with because my strong character but naivety I think. I am intelligent and psychologically aware enough to recognise this, but due to my lack of RP knowledge, being emotionally immature and sensitive it was hard to understand and combat this effectively.

I am living with two guys, B and C. B has been brought up with a SIW single mother and strives to be the Alpha. He is soliphistic, C&F, has experience and knows that being a dickhead can get you girls. He constantly acts like this with the girl. He has RP knowledge but I doubt he knows TRP because he seeks constant validation, admits he is crazy and always feels like he needs to talk. I trust him because he said he fell out with his mates because they betrayed and couldn't take that he was the alpha male. He says he values loyalty and incorporates it into him frame. C is much better with women I feel, he knows of TRP. Isn't the solidest Alpha though, was bullied also, and had a slightly difficult nuclear family.

A girl came round today who I kissed last year. I orbited her for a bit but hard and soft nexted her after I found out she was fucking another guy. I am indifferent about her now. After meeting her B, chatted to her quite a bit over social media (he has already slept with her mate). He also agreed to meet her in town with us today and knew when she was came back to the country. I asked him if he wanted to fuck her and told him I wasn't bothered but he said he wouldn't do that. He is in bed with her now, so I am assuming they have fucked or something. (However, I think she is looking for comfort, considering B's constant supplication and validation seeking and not to be relegated from the couch).

C has also noticed B's behaviour with the girl and told me today that he suspected something once or twice. I respect him for being a mole rodel to me but has done things in the past which has made me suspicious of him. In first year, I called a girl up to my room (call her X), who was giving me IOI's. I asked if she wanted to get with me, she said she really wanted to but told me she was fucking another guy (which was real). I said 'that's cool' and she left the room. However, I still wanted to fuck her, so I turned her around in the corridor and kissed her. It was passionate but she broke off. Afterwards she told people I was a bit 'rapey'. After reading RP it was just a hamster to protect herself, cover up shame. She even told us she was the girl who 'ended up sleeping with guys in her group'. (this girl has fucked 3, possibly 4 guys from our group now btw). C found out what happened and began to lecture me about how I shouldn't treat girls like this (which in truth he was partly right because I approached the situation totally wrong). C then starts fucking X shortly after this.

In second year, I was still anxious with girls, after being called rapey. I start chatting to another girl I fancied. I fucked it up and now this girl is C's girlfriend. He knew I fancied her, and started texing her immediatley after, even possibly at the same time as me. He even flirted with her when I was there. I was too anxious to do anything anyway. I don't care anymore now though, but all of this has made me suspicious of him, one of my good alpha friends fell out with C too and was suspicious. However I think this is just tough love and C being oppurtunistic.

Am I being naive? Or should I be naturally cautious? I don't want to play he said she said. I don't know if I should just continue trusting my mates. Should I confront B, don't want to give of needy beta behaviour? Is it wise to trust a guy who says or displays he has no morals? I felt uncomfortable about C telling me what he thought, and everyone picked up on this. I told B and C I would tell them later (only if advice here says I should do), I told them I was thinking. I need insight on knowing if these guys truly are my mates, or if I should just carry on being me and achieve greateness.

note: I go out with these guys and ideally would like a group of wingmen and real friends I can trust for game, comradery and loyalty. I am also buying; How to Win Friends, No More Mr. Nice Guy, 48 laws, Models. I also have another group of mates I don't live with but deem true alpha's. I would happily chill with them, but I don't know if it's wise to just cut B and C out.

  1. Because I live with them. 2. Extreme change can be maladaptive. 3. I like and respect these guys (however this could change if I find out they are lying and/or using me). 4. I know these guys aren't the greatest alpha's yet but I recognise the potential (I'm thinking of becoming a coach, I do coaching in my psychology course). 5. I want to create a group of true alphas. 6. I recgonise and identify with their faults because we are all similar and have had similar backgrouds and upbringings.

Also, if anyone has any links or advice about how to get into coaching in the U.K. please let me know. Thankyou for the all advice and guidance.