I feel used

We met through an app where I was just swiping for fun. Was just looking for dates, no intend for a relationship. Although she is not my type she had something going and we matched. Turns out she was just visiting and lives three hours away.

We been chatting for two weeks. We had lots in common and I enjoyed talking to her. I really wanted to see her in person. Kiss her, maybe taste some more? So I invite her for some dinner and she travels all the way to me. Dinner, then some ice cream, then drinking some coffee, great date. I drop her off at her train and she kisses me just before the train leaves. Movie material here.

Another week of chatting. I have some business near where she lives in the evening so we decide to see each other. Unfortunately I can't make it on time and we meet only briefly for 5 minutes. We just stand there for the remaining time looking in each others eyes, hugging and kissing. I should make this movie!

Back to chatting again. I feel there is some distance between us. I point out I feel something and she tells me she is doubting she likes me as much as I like her. As in: I am becoming too attached. I guarantee her I am not and this is the truth. We are not in a relationship, only seen each other twice and I am still dating other girls. I mean I do like her, but in love?

We are planning another date and here is where I make a mistake. I told her I was sorry I couldn't make it the last time and will make up for it with this date. Gave her a finger, she took me hand. Still feel the distance. I have to keep conversation with her, her answers back getting shorter with the day.

She call off the date less then 24 hours before. She was feeling ill or something. I react irritated. Am a little disappointed in her. Days later we talk again about how our little relationship isn't going really well and she tells me she is depressed. I have been depressed and I recognize the symptoms. I do believe her.

She says the way I reacted made her feel again I give more about this relationship. She does not want to disappoint me or hurt me. I tell her i am going to take my distance and she should sort things out for her self. Contact me if you want to date again, i am okay either way. Another big mistake: I gave away all the power.

Two weeks go by: radio silence. I moved on and confirm for myself I wasn't the one caring to much. Haven't thought of her a moment. I am so proud of myself.

So here we are, a boring day. I decided to poke her a little, maybe? I am visiting again in her area and have to know something about transport. Just checking her feelings towards me, her reaction and how she is doing. I ask the questions and she is happy to help me.

Then she kept conversation and we are chatting again like before. I hold back, I do not wanna feel like I am the one leading and initiating. She brings up five more topics and she is talking a lot. She wishes me a good night and next morning she starts conversation again. Monday: nothing. Okay, she has to work but back to radio silence again?

She is kinda stuck in my head again now. I really felt like she was waiting for me to start everything again. But now she threw it away again? I feel used. I feel I am getting tested. I know she is bored. She quit her major, is waiting to start again this september and has to work all day right now.

What is my next move? I kinda would like to date her again, but if it does not work out I would be okay too. She is girlfriend material. I kinda wanna ignore her and see how she reacts. I had chosen we should take our distance and now I contacted her. I feel finally in control a bit again and she is chasing me.

TLDR: accusing me of liking her to much. I take distance and then contact again with innocent question. Now she talks again and keeps conversation. Next step?