My Red Pill journey did not begin with the discovery of this site, but rather from a gut-wrenching experience with a girl back in high school that taught me the harsh realities of social relations.

From that terrible experience, I have since learned to turn off my brain for anything other than academics. This means that when I'm interacting with anyone, I follow my gut feelings that guide me towards the things I want to say or do. My life has significantly improved since I started doing this, but I still feel empty and discontent.

Whenever I have a good time with a girl I start getting thoughts like "I should fuck her, I am a failure if I don't fuck this girl." Even though I'm not feeling that tingly lovey-dovey butterfly feeling in my gut when I'm with the girl, I still get these thoughts demanding me to fuck her for the sake of fucking.

I don't know whether my intentions are being guided by my gut or my brain and I need advice.