I read some "traditional" family novels during my life, like we all probably did, and I always read about scenes where the day before the wedding all female family members would gather with the spouse and teach her how to please her men in bed, in the kitchen and in all areas of life, how to stay fit and beautiful for him and so on.

I was told by my mother that the day before the wedding her mother and in law had told her how to behave for her man. She, like others of her age, had dismissed those hints and advices as anti-feminist and too submissive, in turn I was never told or shown how to please your SO in a feminine way.

I feel that by coming here I am unveling secrets that are kept from male general knowledge (the trick doesn't look as magical if you unveil the secret!!) and passed on from woman to woman.

While I hear the outside world shouting in my ears what I am supposed to demand and ask for I come here and I am shown respect, along with trust that as a woman I can take my own responsibilities - make myself and the people around me happy.

I can read things that I knew were inside me all along and just needed validation to flourish - I was like this but not in my full potential.

I now make treasure of these kind of advices and examples from anywhere they come (especially from my in-law, I'm going to her place with pen and paper and getting all her recipes her son and I like) and I will make sure to tell my future daughter, possibly before her wedding night, and even before she starts giving in demands of pushy boys, about the pleasure of accepting your femininity and getting the best for you and others out of your existance as a female.

I will also teach her to take direct responsibility for what is not working and to be a positive example even before asking others something. I'll also tell her to not dismiss and blame her man for his sexuality but to appreciate him for his manliness and celebrate it.

I don't know about you but I grew hating men for what they were and what they liked, and I felt the only needs worth listening to were mine. How wrong and childish I was!

I feel like this thread is filling a gap that I didn't even realize was there, I have some catching up to do and I'm working on it.

Does this make sense? English is not my first language so I may have messed up the meanings.