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[–]awayofthought4 points5 points6 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I can relate. I think it is how most men operate. Most people are constantly oscillating in regards to their mentality, focus, and their drive. Very few people wake up in the morning and are ready to go whateer they set their mind to.
I find that the best way to improve and make your frame more consistent is to constantly push yourself towards discomfort. This is why TRP advocates going to the gym, hitting on girls, getting paid etc.
Action steps:
1) Start talking to strangers EVERYWHERE. In line, public transportation, walking around. Hit on girls, find cool contacts, and improve your ability to communicate.
Whenever I am going to a party, I just immediately "ping" three girls there. I don't care if they are hot or ugly; I just walk up, say hello, BS for a bit, and walk away. By the third interaction, I am "socially lubed up".
2) Try new things. Routine kills your ability to be uncomfortable. Do new exercises, go to a different bar/club, try new activities.
3) On those days that you feel you have completely lost your frame, just keep pushing to get back there. You have to push yourself through those mental barriers and try to embody that Chad mentality again.
Sometimes I visibly shake or my hands tremble when I speak to people.
I have never experienced this, but this could be a symptom of a greater underlying issue. Is this coming from a place of insecurity or just overall general anxiety? Might be something to this or it's all in your head.
Reply if you need anything clarified.
[–]TwelvePac0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
A point to be noted about my hand-shaking is that I never noticed it myself, it was only when my friend pointed it out, that I became aware.
Usually it's not from a place of insecurity, rather overall anxiety. For example, when I have 'off days', I realize it and try to push myself out of my comfort-zone (in context to those rough days) and my hands shake when I'm doing so. However, other days I can push myself out of my comfort zone with zero signs of anxiety.
What did you mean by 'there might be something to this'? -- Should I be concerned?
Thanks for the input bud!
[–]awayofthought0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I was just making the connection that this hand-shaking might be coming from a place of anxiety and maybe even insecurity. Or it might be that you are going way out of your comfort zone, which is a good thing.
I wouldn't be concerned until you see it affect your everyday life. Being nervous around girls you find attractive and even other guys is normal. One thing I do recommend is become aware of your body and what it is doing. Take notice of all your ticks/fidgeting/movements that might show that you are uncomfortable or nervous.
Learn to control your body and its responses to certain situations. It is amazing to see what you can control if you actively think about it.
[–]kenpachitz2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You develop a routine for your mental health and hold onto it like your life depended on it.
Things like getting enough sleep, lifting, eating right, keeping your surroundings clean, making to-do lists and crossing them off, dressing up, meditation, a hobby you enjoy, socialising with people you care about, and seeing your favourite plate or FWB.
Any time you fall off the wagon, forgive yourself because life can be a bitch at times, and you get back on it ASAP.
As long as you work on integrating these things into your life, you'll keep an even keel for longer and without issues.
[–]room_303 points points points 9 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
A little point to start drilling into your head which will always be relevent in your life. Every single person who isn't you has got insecurities and is racking their brain as they are talking to you with worries about themselves and if they are presenting themselves well.
They might to have a little more than average anxiety or trembling, or maybe they used to have panic attacks one year ago but this year they are better, day in and day out with each interaction and time they stepped outside they grew more and more confident, their voice found it's baseline, their walk, their talk, their lore has grown better, they are not perfect, you are not perfect, three steps forward, four steps back, slowly you will grown into a man.
Thanks for the advice bro! - which foods and exercises should I implement? I've been trying to swim daily and lift 3x/week for a while now.
[–]badchad_isglad0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I have had the same problem...still do on occasion. Whenever I did not get enough sleep, eat right, workout, stay on routine, etc. I suffered in my daily interactions.
We all have off days, but not taking care of yourself causes the biggest fluctuations.
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[–]awayofthought4 points5 points6 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]TwelvePac0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]awayofthought0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]kenpachitz2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]room_303 points points points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]TwelvePac0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]badchad_isglad0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link