**The Wolf**

Recently I've seen an influx of posts regarding spirituality and how many in the community have found their way to TRP through spiritual means. I would like to share one of my experiences in my own spiritual journey that only recently has begun to make sense to me. I would love feedback or interpretations of this experience, so please feel free to post.

I will preface this by saying that I have always been a spiritual individual. Some years more than others, but for the past 3 years I have meditated regularly and I will admit that I used to smoke weed to enhance this experience. I no longer smoke, but I do have to say that it did allow for much more vivid imagery and deeper meditation. I am slowly working to get to that point without the use of it, but it is just that, a slow process. In addition, I had been in a LTR with a life sucking bitch. Seriously, she took and took with no regard for anyone else. I always felt drained around her and suffered from depression during that period of time. I believe that this is vital to my understanding of this spiritual event and has made it an extremely profound experience in my life. So without further interruption here is my story.

The ex was back home for the weekend visiting her family. This had traditionally been my time for solitude and I was in a good mental space the entire day. I had cleaned my domain and taken care of loose ends for the week. This was my way of honoring my home and I used it as a sort of cleansing of her negative energy. I prepared my room for the meditation, gathering all the elements required for my journey. I placed a small potted plant, a fountain, 3 candles in the room and cracked the window. Earth, water, fire and air. I took out my two stone totem wolves and placed them on either side of my room facing the doors for protection. I then cleaned my bong and packed a nice big bowl and began to smoke. After I was satisfied with inner energy I then focused my attention to my entire dwelling. I visualize a white protective energy field enveloping my home that will drive out any negative energy and protect me. As always I wait for the wave of tranquility to wash over me so that I may then go into meditation in safety.

This meditation was quite different. I needed answers. I was depressed, tired, stressed, unsatisfied and so many other things at this time. I wanted contact. I had seen a wolf in meditations prior to this, but it only lurked, never speaking or relaying any messaged. I could feel its strong presence in these deep states and I respected it. This time I went searching. I asked for guidance. For answers. For it to finally speak to me and help me find a path to fulfillment. I closed my eyes and began to breath deeply. I am always laying down while meditating with all appendages flat on the bed. No crossing. I felt the falling, the deep emptiness taking over. The loss of feeling in my body and the opening of my mind. My thoughts cease and a stream of imagery floods in. This process takes about an hour as I push myself deeper than I go. I had nothing to lose and felt safe in my space.

I found myself in a room. Marble. Solid marble. I was sitting on bench made of the same material. My legs were crossed and I was in the traditional meditative position. I was not myself, but above it. My point of view was hovering about a foot above my head and looking down slightly. Directly infront of me were two massive marble columns. Roman architecture. They faded to black as I looked up and the ceiling was not visible. Behind them was also black and to my right side. To my left was a doorway. No door. Only marble. I could not see what was outside of it, but it felt menacing. I felt as though I was being watched heavily. I was afraid. In that moment of fear a figure wisped into the room and stopped a few feet from me. It was hooded, in black torn robes. It had no visible legs, but I could see it's face, hair and arms. It was female. Black hair, young and enchanting face. Slender arms and long nails. It came closer and reached its arms out toward me chest. I felt a pulling sensation and from my chest a golden orb emerged. It was warm, and familiar. I felt empty as it left me and she was quick to snatch it away. She consumed it in some manner I was not familiar with and as it disappeared the light in the room vanished. Pitch black. I felt her. I felt her move away and stop at the door. I then heard her say "It is mine. Now find me". Her presence dissipated as I traced it as far as I could. I knew the doorway led somewhere, but I was petrified. I was unable to move and in that moment I lost control. I do not know what happened, but I began to Ohm. Deep, low, bellowing. Ooooohhhhmmmmmm. Again and again. As the ohm's continued the vibrations in the room increased and I felt powerful. Confident and entirely masculine. An orb burst into creation, brighter than the last and illuminated the room. It went into my chest and I felt complete again. I was glowing golden. Aura of pure light and brilliance. I stood up as I regained my control and made my way to the door. I peered out and saw a hallway. I followed.

The imagery faded and returned shortly. I was transported. A forest. Old and vivid. It was nighttime and the grounds had a slight foggy mist. The trees were all consuming. Massive in size and the energy was ancient almost as if to say "We are here and here we shall stay". As I wandered aimlessly I began to feel as though I was not alone. This time I was not afraid. I was curious. I scanned my surroundings and saw it. In the distance, a massive beast. A dire wolf. Brindle fur and glowing eyes which seemed to transition in color. I just looked at me. Saying nothing, doing nothing. Waiting. It was looking into me. Deep into me. I felt its gaze pierce my skin and go straight through my bones. Powerful beyond words. It then turned around and walked through the trees. I knew I needed to follow. I walked for what felt like miles until I could no longer see the wolf through the fog. I kept on in the same direction and approached a clearing. The fog dissipated and I came upon a series of stone stairs each with 2 pillars. The stairs led to a throne made of oak and thorns. Behind the throne was the night sky. Crystal clear and shining with the light of billions of stars.

I stood at the bottom step and paused. The wolf approached the throne from what seemed like nowhere and placed itself on the right side of the throne. Then I felt it. The dread. The fear. I entered a defensive stance and was sure that I was in a trap. From behind the throne a figure appeared. A forest sprite or elemental, whichever you prefer. I knew it was the hooded figure. It possessed the same energy, but had chosen to show itself this time. She took a seat on her throne and summoned me to approach. I did so and stopped within talking distance.

She spoke in a wise yet playful feminine tone "I have something which belongs to you. You may have it, although it will not come now. You must first prove yourself. You will be challenged along this journey for what you seek. You must complete each challenge and in doing so you will earn your light. You may find the light which I have taken to become unfamiliar once you have begun this series of trials. In which case you will have forged a new, more suitable light." She paused, looking to her right to the dire wolf "He will guide you. You have met before, although you have never spoken. He is your strength and wisdom. Your courage and cunning. He is the embodiment of what you seek. He will be with you during each challenge and counsel you in your victories and defeats."

She stood up, turned and gazed out at the vast expanse now infront of her "We will meet again my child. You have much to accomplish and as with all those of flesh and blood, your time is finite. Remember what you seek and the path will reveal itself." She then began to walk toward the night sky and slowly dissipated.

I regained full consciousness instantly. I was startled and looked frantically around the room. I was alone. I felt the urge to write down the experience because I have a terrible memory. It was profound. Almost unreal. So vivid, I felt as though I was there. Since that day I have repeatedly seen the wolf. It is everywhere. I live out in a rural area and hear howling nightly. It's interesting to say the least.

Now how does this apply to TRP? Well I've interpreted this experience as a symbolic entrance onto the Red Pill Path. The words of the forest sprite point to a sort of rebirth if you will. My old light becoming unfamiliar and the new light being the embodiment of the wolf. The traits she describes are necessary to properly transition from beta to alpha and take control of ones life. I could continue, but I believe it would be redundant. I would like to iterate that this is not embellished, I remember her words. It's all I could hear for weeks after.

So with all that said I hope all of you enjoyed my story and I hope it speaks to some of you like it did to me. Again, please feel free to comment. I would very much appreciate it. Thank you all for being a great community and keep on the Red Pill Path my brothers. It is worth it.