Finding an actual purpose.

I’m 18, have hit the gym 5-6 times a week for the past year, I used to play floorball.

When I’m graduating in a year and a half I want to keep studying(I really like school and it has always been “easy” for me) and become an engineer.

I’ve gotten some coochie throughout the past 2-3 years(not plates).

However, this may sound ultra gay but girls haven’t been THAT interesting to me before. Of course I love sex but I’ve had dry months in my life but still felt as happy as when I fucked a girl I was dating 5 days a week.

When relationships have ended I haven’t mourned too much about it, I’ve always had things keeping me distracted instead of sitting at home crying like a bitch.

HOWEVER; I dated a girl by the beginning of this year and during this time I was moving places. So when that relation ended(not because I moved) I was left with a feeling I had never experienced before. I felt that I had done something wrong. I think this happened because my mind was all over the place; I had just moved, I stopped playing floorball because I moved. So I was left with my thoughts and too much time..

I started searching for answers and ended up here, which I’m thankful for.

My in real life game is good, caring about my appearance/frame, eye contact, escalating and such things have been “common sense” to me, I mean a girl ain’t just gonna pull down your pants and suck your dick out of nowhere.

However, on the texting bit.. it’s quite painful to think how wrong I’ve played things from time to time now that I’ve learned how it’s supposed to be done, I’ve not been a needy bitch but I’ve definitely caused myself to lose frame(and sex) by texting dumb shit..

I haven’t started the pussyhunt yet(because of bad logistics for another 1.5 month)but now that I know how it should be done I think too much about it, when I’m not busy doing anything else all I think of is how I want to start gaming and fuck bitches and I know that should not be my purpose in life.

I guess being successful in school is also part of my purpose but I am already and I can’t study 10 hours(no, I don’t have that much free time) to keep my brain distracted, it wouldn’t give me better results.

I’m very happy and I’ve always been, but I know it’s not healthy nor beneficial to think about bitches all day.

What should I do? Try to waste time, find something I’m really interested in?

Sorry about the long rant, any advice is much appreciated.

TL;DR. I feel the urge to fuck girls, I think about it too much and I know that shouldn’t be my only goal in life. I do well in school and got plans for the future, what should I now in the meantime to keep my mind busy?