Background: Married 10 years, 3 kids. Own home. Wife is stay at home mum.

I admit I've been an asshole at times, but I've seeked help and received therapy. I've never cheated, I think I'm a good husband and she tells me I am.

Sex is currently 2 times a week. It involves zero foreplay and I'm expected to finish in 30 seconds as that's how long it takes her to cum. There is only 1 position in the bedroom and that's her on top... If I suggest other positions I'm shot down with her then threatening nothing.... Sex is booked in advance on the same days and she will never do anything spontaneous...

If I ask for anything during the week it ends up being the most unenthusiastic handjob while being told to hurry up...

I just want her to be more intimate and to tease me and include foreplay but she doesn't do it.. if I suggest it's just like I'm waving a red flag at a bull...

Before we got married it was 10/10 effort from her to me every day of the week... Now I feel as though I get the last...

Even a weekend away or spoiling her with cash or gifts gets minimal in return....

Am I being selfish as she tells me? Am I expecting too much?