My last LTR ended like 1 1/2 years ago, it was the typical monkey branching story. It was not the first time this happened to me and I am glad that I found TRP after this and had explanations for the stuff that happened in my life.

Since the breakup I concentrated on myself and didn't go for any approaches, you could call it light monk mode?!

Things changed the past few months and I became aware of a few women giving IOIs, but they aren't women I would consider dating/fucking: Sister of a really good friend, coworker - bros before hoes, don't fuck where you eat.

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So 2 or 3 weeks ago I thought: Fuck it, let's get back into dating and doing stuff with women. Yeah, the dick also wants to get wet again... So I tried it with Tinder.

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After writing with a few women here and there a HB7 (maybe 8 at good days) caught my interest. The conversation went really well, so I asked her out after 2 days of writing a few messages and got her number after her being a bit resistant on this part (bad experiences, weirdos on the internet - you know this stuff). Before the date I was constantly answering way later than her, I really didn't give a fuck and just enjoyed the conversation. She instantly replied with a counterproposal after I made a proposal for a day to meet (IOI) and was most of the time answering within a few minutes.

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The date: We met for having a beer at a river. Conversation went fluently and we kept mocking each other as in the conversations by text before. She is in no way LTR material, but I was enjoying her company. KINO was implemented by both sides. Unfortunately I didn't end the date, she did (she had to get up way earlier than me) and most of you guys would say that the date lengths of 3 hours was too long.

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Here's my problem: I am now constantly overthinking this! My brain is melting because I constantly think about all the stuff that happened, how I should proceed, what I should be writing, when I should contact again etc. I am constantly thinking about the jokes we made in the last conversation after the date and if they were comfort tests or shit tests and how I should react to them. It's so fucking weird and exhausting! I am constantly considering if I was too off-putting in these conversations (before the date she said multiple times that she is looking forward to meeting etc. and I didn't agree fully, instead I kept this humorous: "I also think this will be okay." etc.). She also kept trying to get to know me by text before the date, but I constantly told her that we should keep this stuff for the date (texting only for logistics - doesn't work 100% in online dating). After the date a similar conversation started where we both stated in our sarcastic ways that the date was alright etc and in my opinion there were shit tests or comfort tests involved where I didn't react succesfully.

How do I end this overthinking? How the fuck did I end up doing this and why am I doing this? I'm always trying to sort parts of the conversations by text and while dating and the physical behaviour into categories: Was this a shit test? Was it a comfort test? Did I react accordingly? Should I have escalated more? Did I tell too much about some private stuff? When to write her? When to setup another date? etc.

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So. Fucking. Exhausting.

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How to stop this?

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PS: This is spreading now to a 2nd interesting conversation I'm having on tinder where I am thinking about all this stuff too: When to ask her out/for her number? Am I answering too slow? etc... In addition to that I was always wondering what a succesfull social life would look like, but this would be a topic for another threa.