My LTR calls me this often, and also says i have an ego. She says i never appologized to her ever either. Typically, she will cause drama every now and then. I wont bite, as she creates a problem for no reason. I'll ignore it or move on and make light of it with AA or AM.

She'll come at me and accuse me of being defensive when I don't defer to her view. If i don't say anything short of "you had a point i should have done xyz" and all that kinda stuff(never have) she will call me defensive and stubborn.

She often says "you make me feel like im in the wrong", and "its not about who is right or wrong" in these situations, bringing that aspect up on her own.

My general approach is to not even bother taking it seriously and move on, and not defering to her over some manufactured bullshit. But it does get me wondering after a while. Is the perceived "defensiveness" a bad thing in terms of my behavior from a RP perspective? or is it just womanese for trying to get a rise out of me